silly question but I cannot figure it out

Jack (14 months) does these silly little tantrums when I pick him up. He is fine until I pick him up to go somewhere or change his diaper or clothes or whatever it is I am trying to accomplish. He squirms and wiggles and wails and twists and arches his back and kicks, the whole nine yards. It does not last long and I have really tried to work with him. I tell him that I am going to pick him up on the count of three so that it is not a surprise and he has some warning that he is going to have to stop doing what he is doing. I realized that his sister, Lily, does not mind being picked up quickly in the middle of something but it makes Jack VERY mad.
Regardless, nothing is working and I almost drop him half the time. It is not that big of a deal; however, I was wondering your opinion on the following:

My delimma is - if I were to ignore the tantrum (as most recommend) then would that mean putting him down? Of course, putting him down is what he wants so wouldn't that teach him that his little fit is working?

See my point? I know I really should not overthink this but I am sort of hoping to find something that might curtail these little fits rather than encourage them.

 

Both of my girls do this on occasion, usually when a diaper change is involved

I don't put them down, I just grab and go. I try to mentally and physically prepare myself for the flop and arching so I don't drop them. It has come close on a couple of occasions They still manage to catch DH off guard for whatever reason. If they're being really looney, I try whispering in their ear. That seems to catch their attention and make them focus on me instead of trying to escape!

 

My Jack does this too, and it always catches me off guard because in most other ways he's "the calm one". I usually take a second to try to calm him down, then just keep doing what I need to do, explaining what it is as we go. But so far, 90% of the time he keeps fussing unless we arrive somewhere he'd rather be, eg. DH's office or the kitchen.

 

I think you are actually thinking how I would think about it! If I give in and put him down - it's working for him!! So, I would probably try the whispering as well. That's a GREAT idea!!!

Otherwise, I think it's a big ol' phase that you'll get through!!

 

Kevan does this -- his favorite trick right now is to "climb" me when I'm holding him, and then wiggle and throw himself backwards, and I end up nearly dropping him half the time, too.

I usually hug him close and zerbert his cheek, or snort like a piggy right in his ear, which always makes him giggle. If I can get him to laugh, he stops fighting me for two seconds...

Regardless, I still have to practically sit on top of him to change his diaper. It's ridiculous!

 

I wouldn't put him down because he'll just learn to have bigger tantrums until you give in.

Can you try picking him hup and playing a game with him for a monute before changing? How about a piggyback or a shoulder ride, airplane or tossed over the sholder, jumping/ skipping over to the changing area? Basically being silly to distract him.

 

My Jack also does this (maybe something with the name, since mine makes three just in this thread? hehe just kidding...). My perspective on ignoring basically involves continuing everything exactly as normal, without any changes in plan. So in this case, pretending that your child is behaving just fine, even if he's being a total lunatic. I think talking to him and distracting are great tactics. Beyond that, just another of many lovely phases we'll all endure.

 

diaper changes were a nightmare at that age...it's much better now, Jake listens and stays put...Becca, well 'no comment.'

it really frustrated me because when they were newborns, diaper changes were the only things i liked doing because *i* controlled the timetable.

But to your question, just power through what you need to do. He is just asserting his independence.

 

James does that. I've learned to pick him up a certain way that makes it harder for him to thrash around. I grab him from behind (my hands under his armpits), then pull him up to my chest (with his back facing me, his head is level with my bewbs), then I hold him with my right hand while I slide my left arm across his chest and grab his right thigh, then I tilt him across my left arm and hook my right arm around his legs or hold his arms (depends on what's more dangerous at the moment). He can arch and try to kick and we're both safe until I lay him down for his change.

And I also made a game out of it. James loves to pretend he's a cat so I make meowing noises to him and he thinks that's great!