should i be the human pacifier

Please throw your two cents this way. I am so frustrated. so tired.

General stats- I have twin girls that will be 1 year on Feb 4th. They were born at 37 weeks on the nose, healthy and strong (no nicu and weighing 6.4 and 6.6). They are my fourth and fifth children.

Since they were born I have put them down for regular naps when they are awake. They know how to go to sleep on their own. This is hardly EVER an issue. With my other children I really just focused on nailing down this daytime routine and the nightime eventually just sort of took care of itself. One day they just sort of "got it" and started sleeping through the night.

This has not been the case with the girls. Like I said, the daytime- no problem. The initial GOING to bed- no problem. But making it all night??- a whole different story. Sometimes one or both might make it til morning and sometimes one or both will be up 45 minute intervals wanting to nurse all night. One child definitely wakes more than the other but it is a problem for both and there seems to be no rhyme or reason for the waking OR the sleeping. It's like, sometimes they feel like sleeping through and sometimes they don't (and especially for one of them they usually DONT).

This has been so frustrating for me. They are good babies who don't normally fuss for "no reason" so I have been paitent on the nightime thing. Not to mention I have three other children besides them so I thought maybe a few "mommytime" nurses in the night wasn't really a whole lot to ask. But instead of them getting better they are getting worse. They are almost a year old for goodness sake! I am so tired. SOmethings got to give. Any advice would be much appreciated.

 

Do they have non mommy pacifiers heehee? Also since you say they are almost 1 could it be teething since you say they are good babies who don't normally fuss for "no reason"? How about an ear infection? (I know the chances of both at the same time is slim but I always forgot about that possibility when I had an irritable lo.) What about a cribside soother? Is one waking the other? Short of that at their age I would probably try CIO. :unknw:

I did read somewhere that babies sleep cycles change radically through their development and waking at different stages during their nighttime cycle is common, some go right back to sleep and some babies have a hard time getting back into their cycle without help.

I hope you get some good answers and that they start sleepeing better for you momma!!

 

First thought is first year molars?
My twins were very similar and small so I kept nursing them at night. They finally slept through the night at one week before they turned 1, it was a realllllly long year. Our nanny took them overnight to her house for 2 nights, the first she gave bottles, they each took less than an ounce - so clearly really not hungry, the 2nd night she let them fuss, low level fussing for <5 minutes and then went back on their own. When I was around though they wanted to nurse for comfort.

Not sure if my experience helps, but hopefully you are at most days away from good sleep.

 

My short answer is that at age 1- no.
Long answer- only if you want to be.

I do think it's better at that age to be figuring out how to go back to sleep by themselves. If you think it's teething, I would try the Tylenol, etc. If it's not something medical, crack the whip when ready, LOL.

 

Good lord, I have the male version of your twins. They are now 19 months old, and they still wake up regularly (Probably 3-5 nights a week somebody wakes up.). They go down fine, and generally sleep the right number of hours.

The only thing that has helped is CIO, and I mean the not going in at all variety. It's not a miracle cure like some would suggest. We've had to do it over and over again--anything can reset them back to the night waking--a trip to grandma's, an illness, teething, a nightmare, you name it.

The only real hope I can give you is that they have very slowly and gradually gotten better. I know my boys didn't STTN regularly until 13 months old, and it is very slowly getting to be fewer and fewer nights.

 

If I were you I would probably stop nursing and have DH over a cup of water instead. There will likely be tears involved. CIO usually takes 2 nights of "training" for us. However, we have had to retrain them a few times, mainly after illnesses, or new night wakings. What we do is go to them if they cry and pat them and offer a paci, without picking them up. Then we leave. There is little to no crying involved anymore. They don't wake up much anymore, except we do get early morning wake-ups during the 5 a.m. hour.

 

Hi, we had a very similar situation with our twins at one year. We met with a sleep specialist to figure out a plan. We weaned them and used a modified CIO. My DH and I were both so sleep deprived we couldn't take it anymore. I saved the details of our plan. Let me know if you want me to post it. Ours are really pretty good sleepers now. I feel like a human again now that I get sleep at night! Beth

 

I would say that if it were me, at that age, unless there is a reason they need to be eating in the night I would try to wean them off of it, for your own sanity. CIO would probably work if you can do it or a modified version even, if you need to. I know it's hard, but your sleep is important too and they may just be waking out of habit at this point.

 

Okay so here's an update-

we decided to do a version of CIO. Since what I had being doing was SOOO comfort intensive (taking them into bed with me, nursing all night) I thought leaving them in there to cry with no contact was too much. So I thought I would let them intitally cry for about ten minutes and then go in there, pick them up, give kisses and snuggles, and rock them for a bit and put them back down (knowing full well this could cause them to get really mad as well LOL). Then wait about 30-45 minutes before going back in and repeating the process.

The first night this process took about 2 hours. The second night one slept all the way through and the other cried for 2 and 1.2 hours. Last night they both got up and burped during the initial soothing and when I put them back down they went to sleep. So I think it is working! Regardless they have both gone three nights without nursing so keep your fingers crossed for us.

These last few mornings have been the first in a good long while that I have started my day without feeling like I have a hangover or something (pounding head, dizzy, etc) just from having 5 hours of straight sleep. I am hopeful we are finally turning that corner where we all get more sleep. With three other little ones to take care of in addition to the twins I could sure use it!

Thanks for the input!

 

:drinks: Woo Hoo!!! SO happy for you!!! :banana: