She's killing me

Since the girls went to school (and got sick) Samantha has been waking regularly throughout the night. Like, 5-6 times a night. Occasionally Alexis will wake, too, but it's usually just Sam.

We've tried getting them to sleep in their own beds (doesn't happen, they get into bed together), changing the bedtimes routine (to include longer cuddles), and then (at 2am) letting her cry herself to sleep again (she doesn't). Between me sleeping with two thrashing toddlers in a 100lb rated twin sized bed and bringing her to our bed, I'm starting to crack. I need some real sleep.

So, what is this? Is it a growing pain of child care? How do I help her through it? Is this an age thing? What is going on??

 

I would start a reward system. If they stay in bed all night without asking for you they get X. Make sure X is something good that you would not normally give them under any circumstances at 6 or 7am. We use jelly beans and hershey's kisses as X. Make sure you give Alexis her reward every day even if Sam wakes up. Make sure you talk about how great it is. Make sure your husband does it. You can phase it out easily after she is sleeping again.

 

When it happens with my kids, I go in, hug them for a bit, put them back in bed, and leave. The second time I tell them I love them but I need sleep and I will see them in the morning, and I don't go back. They might cry a bit, but the phase never lasts. When it comes to sleep we've never given in and always done a 'tough love' approach, even when they were babies. They're pretty good sleepers overall now... I think they know that we won't come back.

 

I went through the same thing with one of my twins at the exact same age. We were going through a lot of transitions around that time... no more binkys, potty training, toddler beds, and news of a new baby. He was getting up around 5 times a night while his brother slept right on through. He would wake up screaming, but was easy to settle back to bed. Unfortunately, we battled this for 3+ months. I don't know if it was a phase, but I tried A TON of things to help him. Some things that I think helped are (some of which you have already tried): sleeping with the door open, sleeping with a Twilight Turtle in his bed that he could turn on when he woke up (strangely, a night light in their bedroom made things worse), longer cuddle time before bed (also helped both boys settle down quicker and the bedtime parties went away), and moving to a regular bed (his new full sized mattress is SO comfortable, better than my bed!). I did read that around that time, kids can start dreaming and having night terrors... could've been that. There were a few times when he would wake and just be out of it. That time was so incredibly difficult and I totally sympathize with what you are going through!!! Good luck!!!

 

Oh yeah, like the other poster said, I do something called "sleep treats" for when the boys "stay in bed, be dry, and be quiet." I remind what they need to do to get a sleep treat every time I put them to sleep (night time and nap time). For us, it is a dum dum sucker.

 

Ours are 2 years 5 months and we're going through the EXACT SAME THING with Twin A. We tried "crying it out," but she's in a toddler bed and doesn't have a gate on her bedroom door - end result: a tired, hysterical twin racing around the house waking everyone else up. We tried a reward chart where she could earn stars for a big prize- her sleeing sister got the prize after 7 days (yes I threw some sibling rivalry in there to sweeten the pot); twin A tore the chart off the wall daily for nearly 2 weeks after earning only 3 stars, two of which were for nights where she woke multiple times, but at least went back to bed quickly without throwing a fit. We tried waiting her out - I'd lay on her floor by her bed - over an hour later, she was still up playing with her breath (making a weird sucking, blowing noise); I, however, had fallen asleep twice. I even tried massaging her to sleep until my shoulders hurt - somehow she managed to fight it.

I am not sure that there is some magical cure or fix. No one has replied with a cure to my previous post. The only thing that has somewhat worked is having the twin use the restroom when she wakes. This has led me to wonder if she is waking because she is developing awareness of her full bladder and not wanting to pee in the nighttime diaper - but this only works occasionally.

So, big hug. You're not alone in exhaustion central. I should note that I have spoken with two other moms whose kids are doing the same thing around this same age. Here's to hoping they outgrow it SOON!

 

As a side note, Twin A was the one waking up in our house, too!! Hugs to BOTH of you!

 

Sounds like she formed a night waking habit after her illness kept her up and now she's testing you. It happened all the time with my son. He would often wake at the same times, because it was such an ingrained routine. I went the tough love route after trying everything else for weeks first. But it was so hard to break the habit with him. A couple things the dr. recommended to me, which I didn't really try were to gently wake him before he woke up (if he was waking up around the same time all the time) to try to alter his internal clock and break the habit. He may have gotten into the habit of waking at the same point of a sleep cycle all the time - which would explain the multiple wake ups. The other suggestion was to try a sleep aid like melatonin. I was a little leery of either suggestion, so I didn't do them. And like always, the phase passed on it's own - just not as quickly as I would have liked!

 

My twin a wakes at night still sometimes. She doesn't wake anyone up though. She just gets in my bed and goes back to sleep...well not always my bed I've found her in my grandmas bed (we live with her) and her sisters bed so I'm not sure she isn't sleep walking. Rewards did help lessen it though.

 

I got my twins this owl night light that turns green when it is ok to get up. I told them they had to stay in bed until it turned green. it took a couple of times of me walking them back to bed, but they learned it within a couple of nights. It's big and the color change is dramatic enough for two kids in separate beds to see, which is a huge plus. You could even combine it with owl stickers in the morning or something.


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