Sensitive Face

One of my LOs is very sensitive about anyone touching her face. For example, I have taught her to wash her own face with a wet washcloth so I only need to do it myself when she is really messy. She likes cuddling but usually not face to face or kisses. She just does not want to be touched in the face. I am fine with her sort of saying "this is my body, I decide" - it's a very healthy attitude - but at that age there are some things a mom needs to do. So I could use some advice on 2 challenges I have with her right now:

1. Applying sunscreen: Putting any kind of lotion or cream on her face results in tears or even a full tantrum; she will really fight me when I need to do this and immediately wipe it off with any bit of cloth she can find, a towel, her t-shirt etc. I have tried showing her how to put lotion on her face but she just daps at a few spots which is not enough for sunscreen. Going without sunscreen is not a choice now that we are having such beautiful sunny days, especially as she is very fair-skinned. For now I just apply it calmly and consistently and try to ignore her protest and to hope that some stays on. Does anyone know this problem? Does anyone have any ideas how to make it easier on her?

2. Wearing an eye-patch: She also needs to have one eye completely covered for at least half an hour a day by doctor's orders. We have not managed this so far because she will tear it off, again with a tantrum if we try to prevent it - short of holding her hands with force for the alotted time we cannot make it stay on. We have tried making it a game, so mom and dad and brother also wear one; we have cute ones with pictures, let her pick one, show her before and after in the mirror; we have tried making it a non-isue just sort of sneaking it on while she is otherwise occupied and distracting her. Right now we are giving it a break. Any ideas for when we start a new attempt?

TIA.

 

Didn't want to read & run... No advice here - does the eye doctor have any advice/ideas for little ones who won't wear the patch?

Also I'd do the same thing re: sunscreen. I'd apply it as best possible while she was having her meltdown, and hope it soaked in enough before she wipes it off. But I'm sure it is exhausting to do this every day. Dare I ask if she'd wear a hat?

Best of luck!

 

Do you think she has this aversion because of the patch and whatever issues she's had with her eye that now she doesn't like anyone/thing near her face?? Are you allowed to use that spray suncreen on faces? I've not tried it myself but could she close her eyes and you could mist her? Sorry, if that might be too much to ask of a little one, not sure. Will she wear sunglasses? Could you somehow combine the patch and sunglasses, or block out one side. I don't know, not much help from me

 

Thank you for your ideas.

The face sensitivity predates the eye patch. She does not have a problem with her eye that she notices, but her sight is far weaker on one eye than on the other so the doctor recommended to "train" the weaker eye by covering the better one because children of this age tend to start "turning off" the weaker eye and they are still building nerve connections for sight so this would not be good thing (I hope this makes sense, I am not at all good with medical terms). The doctor actually prepared me that this might be battle we lose, lots of parents do, but it's worth a try before she has to wear glasses (which probably would be just as difficult, and a lot more expensive).

She does wear a hat (mostly) but she is so fair, like me she gets sunburnt from next to nothing, so a morning or afternoon outside with a hat is not enough protection.

I will have to try a spray sunscreen - good idea.

 

I could be wrong but I don't think you can apply spray sunscreen directly to faces. The ones I have used always specify not to spray directly onto the child's face, but instead to spray onto your hand and rub on, so I don't think that will help you. But maybe you could find a stick sunscreen to use. They are a lot thicker than the creams in my experience, so even if she still doesn't like the feel it may be easier for you to get on/harder for her to get off than lotion. It may also be possible for her to apply it properly herself. Otherwise I think the only thing to do is to carry on fighting her to get it on and try and hold her for a minute or two after to give it a chance to soak in.
My younger sister used to absolutely hate having sun cream on (on any part of her body) and she is very fair skinned and burns easily. My older sister and I used to have to literally chase her down when we went to the beach-she would take off running as soon as the sun cream came out the bag-and drag her back to our mum so she could force her to put it on. We must have been quite a sight! :lol:

Is the eye-patch a cloth one (like a pirate eye-patch) or one of those medical ones that needs to be stuck down? Perhaps trying the other kind would work, although it's probably a long shot if she dislikes things touching her face that much. Could you try giving her some more control over it? Say letting her choose when she has it on (before/after lunch etc) and put it on for herself.
Could you have a 'special' activity for that half hour, something she really likes that you only do while she's wearing the patch, say watching TV or doing colouring or playdough. Or have a reward chart for wearing it, start with a short time and gradually extend it; first she gets a sticker (and/or a small treat like a chocolate button) for every two minutes she has the patch on, then every five, every seven and so on, or even increase it by just one minute at a time if she finds it really hard. You could also use that tactic to break the half hour up into smaller chunks-so she wears the patch for two minutes then takes a break for five minutes. If you try that it might be helpful to get a timer so that she can see the time she has to wear it running down (hourglass timers are great for this, but digital/wind up timers work too), you could time the breaks as well.

Good luck, I hope you find something that works. It must be really hard knowing she has to do these things to keep her healthy when she hates them so much. :hug:

 

Stick sunscreen for her face. She might be able to apply that, it is a lot easier. Also, let her have the first go and then you take a turn. Turns are fantastic, it lets her do enough of the work to let her get the "i do its" out and then you get to make sure it is done right.

For the patch, work her up to 1/2 an hour. Start with 5 mins until she is used to wearing it. Then up it to 10 mins, then 15. You will need to wait until she is used to it every time you increase the time. If she tears it off, you start over. Set a timer (oven/kitchen) so that something besides you sets the time. Also, does she like playdough or something she can be hands on with? If so, get her a new version of her favorite hands on toy to distract her while she is wearing the patch. You could also bribe with TV if that is her big thing. You could also try the eye patch while eating or bathing. Just make sure you are doing something along with the eye patch (that is safe for her to do and that she REALLY likes). Good luck. They are so opinionated at this age, it makes life a little harder.

 

I just wanted to say thank you for your ideas.

The eye patch issue seems to have resolved itself. We had given the issue a break and not mentioned the eye patches for a few days, just left the box with them on the dining room table in plain view. One morning my little girl sits down for breakfast and asks for the eye patch. Since then she has asked for it on her own at some point every day, not always at the same time, and she has then also decided when to remove it, after anything from 15 minutes to an hour. Problem solved - I think she now feels in control of the eye patch and thus much happier with it. I am happy, and I am puzzled - there sure is a lot going on in those little determined heads and it is not always easy to figure out.