Question for those who use timeouts

We've been using timeouts only for really horrible behavior (biting, hitting, kicking). Now that my boys are older, I'm thinking about expanding my use of timeouts. But I'm not sure that timeouts will work for any of the issues I've been dealing with lately. Has anyone used timeouts for any of these problems and did it work? Did you give them a warning first or put them in timeout the first time they do it?

1. throwing toys
2. touching things they are not supposed to (computer, DVD player, etc.)
3. flushing toys down the toilet
4. Getting out of their beds after their bedtime
5. Continuing to do something after I've asked them to stop (like banging on the tv)

Also any suggestions on how to deal with these behaviors will be appreciated!

 

This is what we do:
1. the toy gets taken away (basically it gets put in time out and the offender gets a warning, then if done again he goes in time out.
2. If they touch things they aren't supposed to I give warnings and try to redirect, but if that doesn't wirk they go in time out.
3. Never had this problem
4. If they get out of bed they get put back in with a warning then ig they do it again they lose something they are sleeping with (mine usually have a couple of things) then they are told if they stay in bed and are good they will get it back. If they get out again they lose the chance of getting that toy or blanket back and they lose another one.
5.time out, if I ask them bot to do something and they keep doing it iit's straight to time out. I might say '"stop banging on the tv please, or you will go into time out", then if they don't listen it's straight to time out.

Being consistent really helps they know what threy can and can't get away with. You also have to follow through with what you say because they learn quickly that you don't mean it and will keep doing it.

 

We use the techniques from the book "1-2-3 Magic." Basically they get two warnings (1 and 2) and if they do it a third time, they go to time-out. We use that for just about everything - touching things they shouldn't, throwing toys, climbing on the coffee table, etc. If it's a "larger" offense, like hitting or pushing, they go straight to time-out. HTH

-Catherine

 

QUOTE(rosie19 @ Apr 17 2007, 12:44 PM) [snapback]223264[/snapback]
We use the techniques from the book "1-2-3 Magic." Basically they get two warnings (1 and 2) and if they do it a third time, they go to time-out. We use that for just about everything - touching things they shouldn't, throwing toys, climbing on the coffee table, etc. If it's a "larger" offense, like hitting or pushing, they go straight to time-out. HTH

-Catherine



Dito....we make them put there nose on the wall in the corner and one minute for each year of age so my son gets 7mins up ot ten minutes and the twins get 3-5 minutes

 

QUOTE(rosie19 @ Apr 17 2007, 12:44 PM) [snapback]223264[/snapback]
We use the techniques from the book "1-2-3 Magic." Basically they get two warnings (1 and 2) and if they do it a third time, they go to time-out. We use that for just about everything - touching things they shouldn't, throwing toys, climbing on the coffee table, etc. If it's a "larger" offense, like hitting or pushing, they go straight to time-out. HTH

-Catherine


another ditto from me and it works like a charm. Anthony will wait until that number 3 EVERY SINGLE TIME! But it's fine, as long as he stops. Time outs aren't as common now, because they know it's coming!

 

Another 1-2-3 Magic "ditto" from me.

I bought an egg timer from Target and they get two minutes in "the purple chair" for time outs. Actually, Jade really never needs time outs, just redirection. Melissa needs them, and responds to the 1-2-3 technique. She also despises the tick-tick-tick of the egg timer so it's a very effective threat ("I'm getting the timer.").

 

We follow 1-2-3 Magic too. The author spoke at our twins group last year. We have been using his methods and they work. You need to be consistent and very patient. We have had some challenging moments with discipline, and I have found that if I take my emotions out of it, then it goes a lot smoother for all of us.

 

We also do 1-2-3 magic so that might be a good idea. We've been doing timeouts that last 1 minute per year (so they get 2 minutes now) and when they're done we discuss what happened. They may be a bit young but I want to encourage repetition when we're dealing with everything (learning and "punishment")

 

I've been using TO for the "major" offenses too, without any type of counting or warning.

1. When it's a toy they are misusing, it gets taken away, along with a simple to the point reason why it is being taken away.

2. With touching something, redirection works with Colin, but Ryan seems to enjoy testing me and will resist all attempts at redirection (even standing there giggling continuing to do the behavior I am telling him to stop) until I start to count, he usually says "2" after I say "1" and he will stop the behavior. (but OY what I have to go through with him!! :huh:

3. No toilet troubles, as I keep that door shut with a child proof cover on the knob.

4. Still in cribs, and dread the issues when they go to a bed!!!

5. I handle just like #2.

Like blessedby2 stated, I too have found it goes better for all if I take my emotions out of it. It really adds fuel for Ryan to continue the misbehavior, and for Colin it seems to upset him (neither are things I want to do!!)

I just keep reminding myself how everyone says to be consistent (as I repeat myself over and over throughout the day!!) :blink:

 

1. throwing toys
We usually take the toy away and put it in time out.

2. touching things they are not supposed to (computer, DVD player, etc.)
One warning and then straight to time out.

3. flushing toys down the toilet
I've been lucky here and haven't had them mess with the toilet, I'd probably do warning then time out.

4. Getting out of their beds after their bedtime
I warn once that I will take away thier lovey (blankie), if they continue I usually take it away for how long a time out would be, my boys are 3 so I take it away for 3 minutes.

5. Continuing to do something after I've asked them to stop (like banging on the tv)
Sometimes I give a tougher time out. Time out in our house is on a chair or on the couch. If they get up from time out they have to go in thier room for time out, mine hate that. So things they just continually do after a regular time out sometimes get elevated to time out in their room.

 

I have to recommend 1-2-3- Magic for this! It's a quick read and it will help a lot!

 

I always get down on their level and give them a warning or 2 before I put them on the timeout. If they keep doing it, they go on a timeout for 3 minutes.

Pretty much everything you listed would also be grounds for timeout in our house, except getting out of bed, because mine are still in cribs.

 

Thanks for your all your advice! I got a copy of 1-2-3 Magic and will start reading it. I never thought about putting a toy in timeout, good idea! Our toilet problem is a new one because they just figured out how to undo the toilet lid lock last week. Ever since then, they've been fascinated with it and are flushing things down.

Maybe if I start potty training they'll refuse to go near the toilet