Question for moms (or dads) who are twins themselves

I was thinking the other day that when I was at school I was jealous of twins in my class because they always had a mate and I am so pleased for my boys that theyre always going to have a best buddy with them (hopefully)
So I was wondering to the mums that are twins (if there are a few?) can you advise on your experience with your twin - are you close and do you feel special being a twin? Whats the downside of being a twin that us new twin moms should be aware of..?

 

That's a great question... I love being a twin. My sister and I are very close and I'm so happy to watch my boys (hopefully) share the same special bond that my sister and I do. Growing up a twin was great. We moved around a lot and my mom always insisted that we were in the same class together to make the transistions easier. I don't know how I would have gotten through grade school without my sister. My sister and I were painfully shy and I don't know if that comes from the attention that being an identical twin brings. Anywhere we went we'd become the center of attention and that is a little unnerving when you're so little. My mom tells a story of how we walked into a relatives house once and everyone in the room was laughing at something funny that someone had just said- my sister and I broke out into tears because we thought they were laughing at us. As a young adult I was afraid that I couldn't make it on my own without my sister, something that going to separate colleges helped with. I had always thought that the friends I had were a result of my sister (she was more outgoing than me) but going to college by myself proved that I could make it on my own- even make my own friends. Now as adults with our own children (she has her own set of twins, too!) we're enjoying the whole twin experience all over again. Being a twin is so special- it's something I wouldn't trade for anything in the world! Enjoy your boys!!

 

I've always thought having a twin was one of the coolest things in life.

Beyond that--when they get to a certain age in school, unless they WANT to be kept together, separate them. Its easier to not have a sibling in class with you, unless there is no competition between them whatsoever.

People worry about twins not having their own "identity" and about things like birthdays not being "special" because they have to share, but its really kind of cool to share a birthday--that in itself makes it seem more special. I never once resented sharing my birthday growing up.

 

According to my husband who was a fraternal twin it was pretty wonderful most of the time. The only time he said he didn't like it was for a few years in high school when he and his brother felt like they were in competition with each other over things like grades, girls and sports. Once they got to college though they were best friends again and still continue to be even though we live in New York and his brother is in Texas. They have quite the bond and it's exciting to think of how our girls are going to have that same bond.

 

I'm not a twin, but my brothers are fraternal twins & I grilled them on all sorts of twin questions when we found out we were having 2 boys. I don't recall my brothers ever getting along all that well & they agreed to that. They are SO polar opposites. They were always competing, had total different interests that led them into total different groups of friends, & when they separated for college, they rarely talked. To this day (they're 33), they talk MAYBE once a month. It's not that they HATE each other, or feel resentment towards each other...they're just like siblings that don't get along super well. They never seemed to mind sharing birthdays or getting 1 gift for the 2 of them, but I know they did hate sharing a room (even non-twins will agree with that!).

I'm hoping my boys grow up with a better bond than they did. I don't believe my mom did anything wrong. I just think it was their personalities. I get along better with one of them vs the other, so I think that's just how it goes with siblings.

 

My grandmother had a twin brother, and it was really neat reading his remembrances of her after she passed away. He wrote about things like playing games after they'd been put to bed (writing letters on each others' backs, etc), about her teaching him how to get along with girls and how to dance. I never had a chance to know my extended family very well, but you could tell there was a really special bond between them.

 

I'm not a twin, but my Aunt and Uncle are fraternal twins, I have b/g twins. I'm always asking my grandma how it was raising b/g twins. she said my uncle was always looking out for this sister and protecting her. they were best buds and never really competitive because he would have his boy thing and she would have her girlie thing. I hope mine get along as well.