PT for the lazy child.. HELP!

Evan is smart. He knows what is going on, but has been 'lazy' throughout his 3 years, 2.5 months. For example, he knew how to roll over but after doing it once, didn't do it for months afterwards. He LOVED tummy time! He was 10 lbs at birth and now is a bit of a peanut. I think he is about 35 lbs. Well, he showed signs of potty training late last summer. He would say potty chair when I'd change his diapers. He was always successful as well! He got sick and that stopped. So, on Tuesday I started potty training full force. The twins were 3y1m when they were potty trained and E is now almost 3y3m. He does have speech issues like the twins did.

He doesn't seem to care. He is one who pees a little bit at a time. I am reminding him to go potty (forcing) about every hour and he is successful (and gets excited about it) every time. He has once told me he had to go. Today is day 4 and he just doesn't seem to really care if he wets his pants or not. It's not like he gets upset. I use cotton Gerber training pants so it is not pull-ups.

Any suggestions?

 

I wish I had advice for you. Annelise was the same way. It took 10 months to get her trained!! She is finally trained now, but it took until she was 3.5. She just didn't want to do it. If I could do it again, I would have put her back in diapers and waited several months before trying again. The problem was that she was in preschool and they wanted us to be actively potty training. Good luck. I hope it clicks for him soon.

 

Royce just didn't want to do it until he was ready for it. So it was closer to 3.5 for us. But once he decided that he wanted to do it, he was day trained within 2 days, and night trained within a few weeks.

 

I am sure people will have some great suggestions for what is generally a challenge for all of us. My first suggestion would be to put him straight into underwear and forget the training pants. Yes, you will do laundry and clean puddles of pee, but seeing it dripping down his legs and being made to wait to change into dry underwear might kick it into high gear for him. 4 days is not bad, mine have been seriously training for months and still have accidents. Not uncommon. Of course, my guys are 5 and have autism, so my challenges are a little different. In our case, cold turkey is the only thing that worked. Training pants just felt like diapers because they knew they could still pee or poop on them and be clean and dry. One of my guys really could care less though. It is still a challenge for pooping. He could sit in it all day and not care. He knows he shouldn't and wil l hide and tell me not to check his pants if he gets smelly. But, they both hate to be wet. I almost wish it was the other way around!

The next issue I see you bringin up is him being "lazy". Is it possible he has low tone? Not CP, but low muscle tone? if he is slow to do things and a bit lazy with his speech and movements, he could have low tone, which might need an evaluation by an OT or PT. Now that he is over 3, it would not be early intervention, but you could talk to his doctor about it and see if he can set you up with an eval. One of my friend's triplets had low tone and 6 months of PT and OT was all it took for her to catch up. I am not suggesting there is anything wrong, so pleaser don't take it that way. But it can't hurt to take a closer look at the things he is lazy about or have a chat with his dr. Just observe his gross motor skills like jumping, running, climbing, riding a tricycle or bike. And take a look at fine motor skills like holding a spoon, crayon or pencil, picking up really small objects and his grip on things. Play tug or war with him and see how tightly he grips a towel or a stick. When he colors with a crayon does he color heavy or lightly? Just some examples.

 

Believe me, those training pants don't hold much. That is why I do not do pull-ups... pull ups hold too much. We were out yesterday, (was I silly to take him down to the cities (45 min car ride with no diapers) and he was wet when we got to the store. He didn't care.

The twins had speech issues and me calling him 'lazy' is kind of tongue in cheek. It's more like an attitude of he can roll over but after doing it once, decided that he could do it and didn't do it anymore. He loves to follow his big brother and sister around dong (or trying to do) the things they do. He is a very active kid... hence he doesn't look like he was a 10 lb baby anymore! Thanks for the insight... those are definitely things to look at. If he wants something, he doesn't let go very easily!

Thanks for your in put!

 

I did the 3 day PTing method a month and a half ago. One of my DD's was pee trained day and night in one day. My other DD (who is speech delayed at 3-4 hard to understand words max) she took closer to 5-6 days to be pee trained. The regular underware make a big difference as well as asking them to let you know when they have to go (100x a day). Now for course since yours doesn't seem to care he may go a few days of just standing in the puddles...but if you use the 3-day PT method it will make a difference, there are many techniques. However, going #2 was a different story. I ended up doing naked training for that. Each time I knew they probably had to go #2 I just stripped them. Only in the last week has my first DD who was pee trained in one day is FINALLY 100%. Of course my other DD is harder to spot the signs and had some success in the beginning but seems to not care about going #2 in her underware! She also wears a pull-up at night (we tried for two weeks!) Overall having a "professional" plan helped kick things off for us.

 

I can relate. My boys are 3 1/2 and one has been PT for two months. My other DS could care less. I'll have him sit on the potty and after 30 seconds he says he's done. I make him sit longer but nothing happens. One problem is that he does not pee anywhere near what his brother does. I can put him in one pull up a day and by the end of the day it will be wet, but never soaked. He also poops every 2-3 days. His brother will go potty at least every hour and will poop 1-2 times a day.

He'll watch his brother, even cheer him on. He wants to come with when we are out and his brother needs to go potty.

I think I need to put him only in underwear but I really don't know if that will do it for him.

He also used to tell me right away when he pooped, but now he'll sit in it until I smell it. And he'll even lie to me when I ask him which drives me :gah:

I really thought he would be the "easy" one to PT but boy, was I wrong.

 

We have a child who we have used the words "lazy" as well. Some low tone issues (not able to jump) I came on here to start my own topic looking for help. I hope your little one comes around soon.

Heather

 

My DS had issues with wanting to train. I tried and he lost interest and I shelved it for a month. I did not mention anything about the potty to him for 3 weeks until a week before we did the 3 day PT program and I told him that diapers are for babies and he is not a baby anymore and that he would be wearing big kid underwear like his sister. Maybe give your little guy a break from it and then start up again? And point out to him that he will be a big kid like his brother and sister and wear big kid underwear.

 

Yes, after all my training pants ended up in the wash last night (7-8), I have decided to throw in the towel for now (so not like me). He knows what to do but just cannot stop himself from whatever activity he is doing to go potty. Thanks for the advice.

 

Jackie - Ian was like that too and I started making him clean up his own puddles - he'd pee on the floor and I'd hand him a towel or a wad of paper towels and tell him to mop it up (I'd go behind him with carpet cleaner)...that seemed to help it click - he was pee trained in 4 days!...

 

Jackie,

All 3 of my boys could not have cared less about peeing on the toilet until they were 3.5 - they just did not care about it at al, wet and poopy diapers were a perfectly acceptable way to go about life for them. :laughing: My younger guys just potty-trained this summer, about 2 weeks before turning 3.5 on the dot and if someone had asked me 1 week before they PT'd if they were ready, I would have said no way! Then, suddenly, they were. I would have thrown in the towel just like you did and just try again later. It was pretty much effortless for me once they decided they were ready and that is exactly how I like it - gotta be lazy when I can.

I will say we had a lot of luck having the younger boys just not wear any type of bottoms (no underwear, no pants, etc.) during our PT train because they didn't seem to mind pee on their clothing/underwear but they HATE feeling the pee go down their legs.

 

Well, preschool starts in September, so in 1.5 months... so perhaps that will be the push that he needs. He is allowed to go to preschool not potty trained because he is in speech. Thanks everyone!!! I'll probably try right before school starts again.