PT a 3 yo boy -- Need advice!

My DS just turned 3 (today)! His sister has been PT for pee since January, but still is struggling a lot with poop because of her chronic constipation. I recently have been using "potty candy" (Hershey kisses) as rewards for peeing or pooping in the potty to help DD get over her fear of pooping and to help motivate DS to try to use the potty too. What is happening is DD is continuing to do great with pee and not great with poop. DS is getting royally pissed off because DD keeps getting potty candy and he doesn't. He will ask to go potty, do the whole routine (take off pants, sit on potty, wipe, flush and wash hands) but not actually pee or poop. He then screams for potty candy for a half an hour. I thought seeing his sister get candy would motivate him to use the potty, but it doesn't seem to be working.

So, what do you think I should do? Keep up with the potty candy and eventually DS will get over it or start using the potty? Put him in undies to jump start his learning process? (That is what I did with DD and it worked, but our schedule is just so busy this summer that I can't imagine how I'd be able to watch him closely enough for this to work.) Reward him for trying, even though he doesn't seem to need motivated to try?

 

This is what I did so feel free to adjust/adapt/ignore. I used M&Ms and a good try would get some verbal encouragement and 1 M&M, but an actual pee or poop would get a big congratulations and 2-3 M&Ms. It was the verbal encouragement, I think, that helped my boys learn to potty because I was positive whether they succeeded or not. I'd say stuff like "I could see you tried really hard to potty <give M&M>, you're almost there and soon you'll be pottying like a big kid!" It did take a reaaaally long time for my boys to potty train though, so you might want to take this advice with a grain of salt.

Also, I put them in undies, and whenever there was an accident we'd clean it up but I'd tell them I was sure they could do better next time and give them a hug and buck them up a bit.

 

I am no expert, but I have given up on candy for using the potty for just this reason. Stickers are enough to motivate DS 1, but his brother doesn't freak out if he doesn't get one.

When we DID use candy, though, I finally resorted to letting the successful guy "share" his candy with his brother. "Would you like to give your brother a piece?" - and the giver was usually so pleased to be in a position of power that it acted as a double reward. They weren't old enough to figure out how to abuse the power by NOT sharing. Don't know if this makes sense...

ETA - Happy Birthday!!!

 

For the next 2 weeks, I think I'm going to reward DS for a good effort and work on extending the time he sits to earn potty candy. We'll do some periods of naked time with excited reminders that pee goes in the potty, and just overall try to ramp up for all-out potty boot camp. I went cold turkey with DD and had success relatively quickly. For her, praise and my excitement was enough motivation. (Well, except for poop!) Heaven help me, in 2 weeks, I believe we'll be doing boot camp with DS. I think he is one of those kids who is going to learn by trial and error --involving lots of error and pee on the floor.

 

When we first started PTing we gave stickers for attempting and sitting on the potty. After about 2 weeks of that (and after they filled up an entire Elmo full of stickers), we created the sticker chart for each day of the week and they only got a sticker for a successful potty trip. After a week of that, they were over the stickers and were pottying on their own. GL!!!!