Potty training...HELP!

First, I just want to say I'm so glad to be back on this board--it has been so long since I've been on!

Zoe & Payton are now nearly 3 1/2 and we are still working on potty "training". Everyone kept telling me, "don't rush it, they'll let you know when they are ready" and other such comments. Well, we just did it this way: when they started getting curious about what Mommy and Daddy were doing in the bathroom, and when they started asking for their diapers to be changed, we introduced them to the potty. At first we used two pottys --one for each of them. They didn't really do great with that idea, as they simply wanted to use the big potty with a potty cover for their little bottoms (I think it has a princess on it or something and it is pink), along with a stool they can step up on to reach the potty.

So, Zoe was doing fantastic, peeing AND pooping in the toilet, although just not every time. Then she realized that Payton was not right there with her, progress wise, and so Zoe sort of "backed off" potty training somewhat. She still goes in the toilet, only it is not consistent, and she is still using pull-ups.

Payton, on the other hand will OCCASIONALLY use the toilet, but only to pee. She flat out REFUSES to poop in the toilet. But here's the funny thing--Payton is our little girlie girl, who HATES to get anything "icky" on her. Seriously, if you set the girls side by side at the table with a bowl of frozen yogurt, at the end, Zoe will have it ALL OVER herself, head to toe--plus, she will have made a huge mess at the table; Payton will barely have a single drop on herself or her placemat. So point being made, I am scratching my head as to why she would insist on pooping in her pull-up. She is anxious for me to change her the moment she poops, and then when I change her, the smell gags her to the point where now she has to hold her nose or simply puts her arm over her entire face. Truly, it is quite funny to watch, but at the same time, I just don't get why she won't poop in the toilet!! I even asked her point blank: "Payton, honey, why don't you go poopy in the potty?" She told me, "Mommy, when I'm older I will." Aargghh!!! :gah:

So I guess you could say we have used a more "passive" method of potty "training" with the girls because that was all we knew to do after all the comments from folks about them doing it "when they are ready". Well, here they are 3 1/2 years old, still in pull-ups, and not consistently using the toilet. Is it too late to try a more structured technique, and if not, what is that technique???? I don't have the first clue as to what we should do. I feel like we ruined them on potty training! Oh, and pull-ups are getting super expensive!! HELP!!! :unknw:

Oh, and btw, I have been reading recent posts on this board, and I just want to say we have got some pretty awesome twin moms on here! :woman:

 

Do you do anything as a reward for using the toilet? We started with M&Ms for tinkle and Dum Dums for poop, but a sticker chart gave us better results. I printed out a month's calendar from Microsoft Outlook for each twin, taped it on the bathroom door, and they got to pick out stickers and put them on the calendar... a little star for tinkle and a bigger smiley face for poop. I also went naked on the bottom for the first two weeks (whenever we were in the house) when I decided to train hardcore. For some reason, they would have accidents in their underwear but never had any when they were naked.

Oh and one last thing, and this is kind of gross, but we used to play a game called "What's my poop gonna look like" and that got them interested in putting it in the toilet to see it. It is kind of funny because now, they still check out their poop and say things like "Mommy, it looks like I need to eat some more vegetables" or "maybe I should drink more water" or "hey, that poop looks pretty good." Crazy kids.

Good luck!!!!

 

I have one DD who still poops in a pull up at 4. My pedi and a child psyc said not to push her, just gradually get her conditioned to it. Start with asking her to go in the bathroom, then next to the potty, then sitting on pot (with pull up on), then with pull up undone on sides, etc. It's a sensory issue, not defiance. My DD is also extremely neat, and the feeling of the poop falling out is too much for her and kids like her. My DH reminds me that no one goes to college pooing in a pull up and she'll get there. On school days I remind her to wait until she gets home to go, and so far that has worked.

I also gave rewards when we taught PTing. We did chocolate chips for peeing and small toys for pooing. After a while you phase that out, but they work!

Good luck

 

First, let me say that I am by no means a potty training expert. We are going through that ordeal now and still aren't sure how to have a break through. But I can say that our boys, who just turned 3 last month, were not making any effort to use the potty when they were in pull-ups full time. Daycare told us a few weeks ago that it was time to get rid of the pul-ups (except for nap time and night time). And even though the thought stuck fear into our hearts, we knew their daycare teachers were right. Pullups are just a safety net and don't give either party (parents or kids) much incentive to use the potty. So we ditched pullups during the day a few weeks ago. DS1 got it right away and did pretty good with only a few accidents. DS2 was initially content to sit in soggy underwear for hours. Just the past week though there has been a role reversal. DS1 has reverted and is wet almost every darn time. DS2 has done a great job with pottying, at daycare and at home. But DS1 and his constant accidents started to wear thin so, based on some family and friends advice, just today we implemented an M&M reward system. Try to pee but no results = 1 M&M for the effort and some praise. If they pee and get results = 2 M&Ms and tons of praise. If they pee but were wet with an accident they get 1 M&M and we tell them they lost an M&M for peeing in their undies. If they ever poop on the potty I'm going to give them a mini reese cup. I don't know if this will work or not, but my SIL and best friend used M&Ms with their kids and had great results.

For months I refused to reward good behavior with food (for fear of unhealthy eating habits, like I was raised with). But I'm sick of changing soggy wet underwear time after time, even when getting them to potty every 20-30 minutes. And the whining about pottying was beyond annoying! At least now they know if they go potty they'll get a little treat. Another hesitation with implementing this reward system at home was knowing that it wouldn't be done at daycare (nor would I ever expect them to). But we've told the boys that they will only get M&Ms treats at home. However I'm going to tell them tomorrow at daycare drop-off that when they get home they will get an M&M for every time they use the potty at daycare (which is logged on a sheet), so that will give them an incentive to keep pottying at daycare (hopefully).

I thought about a sticker chart but our guys seem pretty bored with stickers. They like them for about 20 seconds, then stick them on something and walk away leaving their sticker elsewhere. They just don't seem to care much about them.