polar opposites with discipline - anyone else?

Do your twins have totally different personalities when it comes to discipline?

Mine have always been very different, from day one, and now I'm starting to see it with discipline too. DD is very much an approval-seeker, and will usually comply if I just tell her "Please don't play with the garbage can, let's do x instead," and beams when she gets praise. DS is turning out to be a push-your-buttons, test-your-limits kind of kid. When I tell him (or even his sister) not to do something, he usually looks me in the eye with a devilish grin and then does it again and again. When I praise him for good behavior, he couldn't care less. (And of course, he's so cute when he grins and giggles as he misbehaves that I have to struggle not to laugh too!)

Jeez, you'd think they were two different people or something! :laughing:

 

QUOTE(fuchsiagroan @ Sep 16 2008, 10:15 AM) [snapback]982260[/snapback]
Jeez, you'd think they were two different people or something! :laughing:


:laughing: Ana definitely is a button-pusher and sometimes she does it because she wants a time-out. She sits in the pnp and talks to herself and looks out the window. Its like she knows she just needs a minute to be alone and just hang. Meara seeks praise and will respond to "We don't..." When she gets put in time out she is NOT happy about it (but she goes into TO less than Ana because she usually stops doing whatever it is after the first warning). Meara is also a little tattler, which is something we'll have to work on eventually. She is constantly saying "Uh oh Ana!" while pointing to Ana doing something she isn't supposed to. But thats a whole other thread!

 

I have polar opposites as well!! I run into the same thing as you with the different personalities. I find it most challenging because they don't understand why I act one way to one of them, and another way to another, when they do the same exact thing. And then when you try to explain the system to someone else... forget it...

I wonder if it will stay this way, or if they will switch it up on us?!?

 

MIne are polar opposites, too. I'm so relieved and glad it's not just me! Sarah is my approval seeker, and will usually immediately straighten up with a look or a time out, but Hannah...well, look out. She'll push your buttons until you pull your hair out. We've unfortunately found that spankings are most effective for her in those extreme behaviour cases (please don't lecture me, I don't do it often and don't like it, but it works). It's tough having a strong willed child and an easy going one. Fortunately, they don't seem to mind or notice the difference in discipline styles at all.

 

Same here! If I do scold Eloise for doing something (like simply saying, "no Eloise) , she just looks absolutely heartbroken and will sit down on the floor and just crrryyyyyy! Lincoln on the other hand doesn't care at all, and is always up to something naughty!

Reyna

 

Mine are fairly different too. They both HATE parental disapproval (they take after their mother that way), which is useful in a way -- because it gives me a button to push -- but also challenging because they will flip out if they think I'm really mad at them.

But if I just say "No don't do that," Sarah will often act like she is completely deaf -- or if I ask her to let go of something, she holds on tighter. "Stubborn" is her watchword. Whereas Amy's watchword would be "volatile" -- if I ask her to do something she doesn't feel like doing, she blows a gasket really quickly.

They do both respond to praise, although Amy a lot more than Sarah. Amy in general just seems much more tuned into wanting to please me -- Sarah is in her own little world a lot more. However, she is also the one who will wail like her heart is broken if I so much as plunk her on the couch and say "time out." I'm still trying to figure out how to strike a balance!

 

Same here! Jacob will usually push the limits and then tell you off in baby language while he is sitting in time out. When it's over, it's over, and that's it.

Jackson will either put himself in time out (!) if he is warned that he will get time out at the next infraction... or he will cry while he is in there if he is put in for doing something after being warned.

We only do 10-second time-outs, but even so, their reactions are SO different.

 

Polar opposites here too! Carley is my complier, she's sensitive and it hurts her feelings if I get angry / disipline her. Natalie on the other hand does the same thing. Testing. I can't even say "don't put that in your mouth" to her, as I just give her the idea - and that's the first thing she'll do. I tell everyone I have the best of both worlds, my cuddly sensitive one, and my funny mischeivious one.... never a dull moment.