Please help with CIO

Hi guys,

We are on the verge of trying ICO. I said I would never ever do this, but at this point we don't know what else to do. Sleeping 4 hours a night (interrupted) is reaching its breaking point.
I know for sure that these babies can SSTN. They've done it on various occasions. Here's our problem.... since they came home we've always got them to sleep while they've been on top of us. We usually get them to a drowsy point and then drop them in their cribs. This usually works. Sometimes we've had to get them fully to sleep on us to get them in the crib. We knew this would end up being a bad idea in the long run.. but we were so desperate in the beginning that we did what we had to do to survive.

We live in a small studio apartment. We've managed to get the babies crib away from our bed to the point where they can't see us if we're in bed to try to create some separation. Moving right now is not an option for us as we're planning a big move next year to California. We have to stay in our tiny place. So that's where (aside from the obvious feelings of horrible mother) the problem with CIO comes in for us. The babies are almost 8 months old and share a crib still. This doesn't seem to be a problem. And honestly we don't have the room to separate them... We do have a travel p&p but I would feel horrible having one of the babies in there while the other is in the crib.

So I really need some advice.

So far today we've bought ear plugs to help drown out the crying a bit as both of us have a very hard time just hearing the babies cry. I don't know how we're going to do this. I keep telling myself that this is for their good and that it'll be better for them to learn to get a whole nights sleep.

Also..... Luna is still waking up and asking (crying at the top of her lungs) for a bottle. She shouldn't be as we make sure that they eat enough durring the day. I think she's just so used to eating in the middle of the night that if she wakes up enough in the middle of the night, then she expects the bottle, and when its not given to her... well..... she'll try to bring the roof down with her screaming of "you're starving me to death". Anyways, there have been plenty of nights when we've gotten her back to sleep without the bottle, and my guess is because we got to her before she full blown woke up... know what i mean?

Anyways. Advice please. Has this worked for you? Has anyone had luck doing this in such tiny living spaces? How long is too long before you say "they're not ready"...... I feel like crying just typing this. :'(

<3
michelle

 

Ok, my girls are 9mo and still share a crib in my room... and they now STTN! It can be done. My girls were sporatically sttn on their own and I did CIO at 8mo. It took ONE NIGHT!

Fortunately I was able to sleep on the couch so that helped. But if they are ready it should be easy! All you are doing is breaking the waking habit. They say it takes 7 times to form a habit and only once to break it.

Good luck!!

 

QUOTE(cohlee @ Jul 14 2008, 09:17 PM) [snapback]876627[/snapback]
Ok, my girls are 9mo and still share a crib in my room... and they now STTN! It can be done. My girls were sporatically sttn on their own and I did CIO at 8mo. It took ONE NIGHT!

Fortunately I was able to sleep on the couch so that helped. But if they are ready it should be easy! All you are doing is breaking the waking habit. They say it takes 7 times to form a habit and only once to break it.

Good luck!!



So then what do you do when they wake/woke up in the middle of the night??? You just start over again?? Go to them after 5 mins... then 10.. and so on??? Or do you not go to them at all if they wake up in the middle of the night??

 

When I go to them, they get louder and pissed. I would check on them without letting them see me and that was it.

 

what cohlee said. just check on them to make sure they're ok, but don;t go to them and don;t let them see you. i tried that in the beginning and they'd get more upset.
as for getting away from it, maybe when you first put them down you could step rigt outside your apartment till they stop (i know you can't do that all night... )
and i know this sounds harsh, but after you've done cio once, it gets easier to hear them cry. for me, cio helped me realize what cries were real, which were fake, which were for attention, etc
good luck :hug99: let us know how it goes

 

we just put them down. luna fell asleep while drinking her bottle before we got her to the crib, but gaia is wide awake.
so far she's stood up once.. now i hear her in there there making little noises.... actually i think she's standing up again.... im so nervous i feel like throwing up. lol.
pablo just went to take a shower and im huddled here in bed wondering whats gonna happen next. *sigh*... *puke*

gaia is making little gaga sounds and now lunch just started whimpering.... PUKEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!

 

yup her we go... we have crying. omg omg omg omg...

 

omg. luna's cry sounded all muffled so i ran to see what was going on and gaia was standing on her head practically. omg......

 

:hug99: Dont puke! You are doing what is best for everyone especially them!
Like Dannielle said, the first night is that hardest for YOU! As awful as it sounds you will get somewhat desensitized to the crying and will definitely be able to differentiate their cries after this.

Put your earplugs in and play some online video games or something.

 

Maybe you could get one of those room separaters/screens to put in front of their crib so it gives them their own area and maybe they would be disturbed less by any commotion in the apt.? I don't know what your setup is so this may not work, but I know if my boys see/hear me at all when they are half-asleep in their cribs, they will start screaming for me. I try to avoid going in their room and only peak in to check on them.

 

QUOTE(me-chelle @ Jul 14 2008, 10:33 PM) [snapback]876803[/snapback]
omg. luna's cry sounded all muffled so i ran to see what was going on and gaia was standing on her head practically. omg......


Put them each back on their own side laying down and dont look at them while you do it. Thats what I do and they usually cry when I walk away but they get over it quickly enough when they realize I am not playing games with them (because they laugh when I come in)

 

so that was the first round. they're both asleep now. luna didn't really wake up while gaia was on top of her (twice), she just cried but stopped as soon as we moved gaia. gaia just fell asleep like 5 minutes ago. now she's totally asleep but sorta whimpering in her sleep. its killing me. she sounds so sad. i can't wait till morning time so i can hug them... though i'm sure luna will be waking up as per usual in a few hours and we'll have to go through this again.

really i don't understand how luna slept through that. that's the loudest i've ever heard gaia cry.... and luna didn't even budge.

hope everyone's having a nice/nicer night. im gonna try to sleep while i can. thanks for the help and encouragement. i'll post again once luna wakes up.