Playing with other kids

OK - I admit - the girls don't really get out much to play with other kids. My only close friend with a child their age works so we don't get together very often. I am also not the most outgoing person, I would never walk up to another mom and start chatting away. We do take the girls to music class once a week and today we went to "toddler time" at a local open gym.

Here is my problem. I never know when to stand back and watch the kids interact with other kids and when to intervene if the kid is about to knock one of them over or is pushing them to fast on a toy. It is even worse when the other parent is right there, I don't want them to get made at me for yelling (and of course it wouldn't be yelling but maybe a quick gentle and moving of their hand). These are our only kids and I don't want to be controlling or over-react.

How do you handle your children playing with other kids who may be more aggressive or physical then your kids are?

 

Mine don't get out much either, but I usually intervene if someone is about to be hurt. Hurt feelings are okay and important IMO for them to learn to communicate, but if a child looks like they may possibly inflict pain, I intervene! LOL!
I also intervene if mine aren't treating others the way I expect them to.

 

I do intervene if another child is hurting or about to hurt mine, or is doing something she doesn't like. Sometimes older (like 4-5 range) are in the playgroup and are trying to play with my girls but they don't "get" it, and end up upset. I just tell the child "Ainsley/Bea doesn't want to play xyz, maybe show her one of the baby dolls/play food (something I know they like)". I've never had another mom react like I am overstepping. I have had my children corrected or pulled away and I don't mind, as long as it's appropriate (a firm no, removal from situation, etc).

 

It's okay to intervene if someone is about to get hurt. I know it feels strange to say something another kid, but if the mother isn't nearby or doesn't say anything, it's okay to step in. I wouldn't get upset if another mother said something to my child if I didn't see it, as long as they weren't mean, etc. I'm always nice about it, and I usually say something like, "please be careful ..." or "be careful of the babies." Unless the kid is a holy terror, they will listen to you. I think most kids are more likely to listen to another mother than their own!