Playgroups

Hi all! I am new to the 2nd yr...as my boys just turned 1 a few weeks ago. I am a SAHM and looking to join in a play group. I found a couple of local ones, but am nervous I will not be able to handle both boys alone. When we go to out, there is always two of us, one per baby. I take them shopping, walking, etc alone...but if we are at a playground or something, and one is eating dirt and the other is climbing up the slide, how do I handle this? Do I just assume there will be other moms there to lend a hand? They are not walking very good yet, so I cannot count on that either..so we are either in the stroller, or they are crawling.

Any insight/experiences? At what age did you ladies begin attending playgroups and how did it go?

Thanks!

 

it's hard...! I started by going with our local twins group to playdates... yeah, real smart... huh? twice or more the babies to moms... but at least we were all in the same boat and we really did look after each others kids! one thing that we did was to bring superyards and connect them together. that's not really practical with some moms groups, but it was great to be able to chill out for a while and just have the kids play around inside the confinement! we also brought blankets for the ground.

as for other moms... I've found that even the most well meaning singleton mom didn't seem to pay attention to the extra kids... not to say they wouldn't, but they didn't seem to be used to having to focus on more than their own child...

do you have a playgroup that you are hoping to join? if not, in our area meetup has lots of great choices.

good luck! also, just do what you can and if it's too much and you don't feel comfortable you can always leave! no biggie! I always brought the stroller and maybe even a leash or two until the kids were used to sticking near each other.

the more you get out the sooner they will start understanding how to play nicely.

 

We started by going to our local weekly twins playgroup - it was indoors though, in a big room, with access to age appropriate toys only. It was nice to be with all other twin moms/caregivers because, as the PP mentioned, they were used to watching out for more than one child at a time. About 6 months after that, I started attending our neighborhood's weekly playgroup, although I called ahead & asked if there were any other moms of multiples already attending. I didn't want to be the only one with twins (not really sure why, other than that I didn't want to answer a gazillion questions or look like the most frazzled mom there :laughing. Anyway, it turned out there were already two other twin families attending which was great. This group was also indoors so I didn't need to worry too much about anyone getting away from me.

 

We started going to our church's playgroup at 13 months. It was indoors, beginning with singing and acting out songs together, then some free playing time for the kids (mostly age appropriate toys, but once in a while we had to store something out of sight), a small craft activity and then more songs and dancing. I was the only mom with multiples and mine were the youngest when we started, and usually someone would have been willing to lend a hand but my LOs are really shy of other adults so it was only for emergencies. It was a great experience and we all enjoyed it, the most stressful part was supervising two during the craft activities but I do that at home too. I must admit that I did not get to chat with the other moms during the free playing time for the first months until my LOs knew the other children and the routine a bit better. I highly recommend going to a playgroup.

 

I agree with this! Meetup is a good source for playgroups. I would also bring the stroller and leash too just in case. If the playgroup does some indoor activities (i.e. storytime) that's a good place to start where you will be able to keep the children more contained. Good luck!

 

I have been taking the girls to playgroups since they were born...obviously more for their big brothers benefit in the early months then theirs That being said I found that between when they started walking (13 months) and when they were stable on their feet and better at listening (around 17 months) going to outdoor playgroups was pretty much impossible for safety reasons.

Most of the organised ones I go to are in a big open room that is safe for kids and babies of most ages (I still have to steer them away from the craft table as they still like to eat the crayons, markers, glue, paint, etc!). If you can find some like that I'd probably start there. There are also usually one or two women there with older kids who are ready to help out and hold a baby if needed.

I also have a twin group that I have been getting together with since the girls were about 10 weeks old. We always meet at someones house and as my girls were the oldest in the group I also found this difficult once they started crawling and pulling up until all the other babies caught up and their moms were forced to baby proof! For a while I had everyone to my place since I knew the girls would be safe. If you do end up meeting up with other Moms at their homes I would make sure their kids are around the same age or older so you know the house will be set up for crawlers/early walkers.

My other advice is to be prepared to leave if you have to. I've had many days where one or all of my kids have just not been up to socializing and have had to leave early with screaming kids in tow...it happens to everyone . Don't be discouraged...you can do it!

 

one more thing... if you do venture to outdoor playdates, find out all the totally fenced in playgrounds!! we have several in our area and that is a must!! Finally at 3 yrs old I have been able to go to places that aren't totally fenced in, but I know I couldn't have done it last year and definitely not the year before! In fact, I went (stupidly) to a playdate at a super cool outdoor playground that had wooden structures... at one point one ran one way and the other the other way and I lost them. I remember freaking out! then when I did finally (1 min. later) get them both back together and over by the swings.... my dd had stepped in an ant pile!! I had to strip her to off to get the ants off. not that that wouldn't have happened at a fenced in place... but it was the the ending to a horrible playdate! I didn't go back to that park until my dh could go with me.

good luck!!

 

I understand what you are saying--but another thing is--the more you do it the easier it will get---i was scared of it too--shoot i hated just trying to get both girls ready alone and get them in the car--but with time its a piece of cake!! and they will prolly be running b4 too long!!

I have a questions too,,,how do you guys find local play groups in your area? i dont know of any,,,accpet plat dates with my own friends babies.

 

I have not even tried to take my boys to a playgroup because around here, they all meet in open, outdoor spaces. My guys are almost 19 months and both go in different directions at the playground, not to mention that they have no fear as far as climbing, diving off slides, etc. and one could easily get very hurt while I'm chasing the other one. So until they are old enough to be a little more careful, I won't take them to the playground alone. Now if I could find an indoor group where everything was relatively safe, I might do that, but our local groups aren't like that for whatever reason.

 

The first group I joined was a twin moms' group, and I did find the other moms helpful when trying to keep eyes on two kids. My girls were a little younger, so they helped when I needed it since their kids were more independent.

I also agree with PP: the more you do it, the easier it gets. It's scary at first, but you'll start to het used to it and maybe enjoy it. I did really loosen up until I went on vacation an let the girls walk around the National Museum of Natural History. They did well, and I assume I did too!

 

I agree about finding a twin group. I've also found that other twin moms are more likely to help watch out for all the kids there.

I've found one twin group thru word of mouth and another twin group through meetup.com.

 

I agree that twin groups are a little easier to start with. I was in a playgroup at first with singleton moms and it didn't work out because I was way too frazzled. I also agree that singleton moms don't seemed to be as attuned to watching more than their own kid. Now that they're a bit older I think I could take them to any kind of indoor play group, but I couldn't tackle an outdoor one yet as my kids tend to take every opportunity to head for the hills.