Play Kitchen Smack Down

Yesterday the girls got a play kitchen for their birthday and I am shocked and dismayed at their behavior ever since. Mostly it's Julia, the bigger of the two. They cannot play together with it because it usually results in pushing, shoving, bitting and crying. Yesterday was the first time I've ever had to use time out and I had to do it twice with Julia. Everytime one of them acts this way I tell them "no" very firmly, explain that the behavior is wrong, tell them that they have to share and play nice and if they continue to act this way, we'll take the play kitchen away.

What happened to my little angels? It's this the beginning of the terrible two's? Will they ever get playing nicely together or will I have to get another kitchen? :gah:

 

I don't know what the answer is, but they have to learn to share. It's the nature of the beast, kwim? Why don't you try this - set a timer for 5 min. and let each have a turn for 5 min. Longer than that probably won't work with 2 yr. olds....so I would try that first. Then I would let them duke it out. At that age, my pedi told me to let them work stuff out unless blood was being drawn. If you see the action, you'll have to act as well. I started timeouts at 18 mos. strapped in the feeding seat, so I think they can do it at almost 2. BE CONSISTENT! If you threaten to take the kitchen away for a while, MAKE IT HAPPEN if they cross that line! Now is the time to instill in them that "Mommy means business" and will FOLLOW THROUGH!!! :hug:

Also....it'lll wear off - the newness....

 

You know what? Even if you bought a second kitchen, they'd still fight just as much, because each would want what the other had no matter what. You can't spend money (especially on big-ticket items!) every time they fight.

Dianne is right: they have to learn to share. I've found it much more helpful to teach them about taking turns, instead of telling them to share - "take turns" is much more concrete. Be as specific and concrete as you can. Instead of "play nice" or "no," try "don't hit your sister," "don't pull that out of her hand," "it's ____'s turn to use the ____,"etc. The timer and time outs are a good idea. Modeling sharing and trying to redirect might also work - if one is playing with a cabinet door, "Oooh, look at the faucet, it turns!"

Just expect there to be plenty of fighting! It's exhausting, but it really is a great chance to teach them about taking turns. They will get better at it, I promise!

 

I started a timer to get my girls to share. It did work wonders for us. They fussed and moaned and groaned for a while, but once they got used to the idea it was lovely. Good luck!!

 

Our play kitchen caused a "bloodbath" too but they do get used to having it and it does calm down. It never fails though. It makes me dread bringing new things into the house because I just know it's going to mean trouble. (ooh, I just saw that our kids have just about the same birthday ). Anyways, time outs don't really work for us. I am going to get a timer because I hear they are great but what works for us is me saying "If you can't share (or play nicely, or stop spitting water from your sippy cup, or whatever) then I will take it away. And I do. And they know it.

I had to tie the play kitchen to my banister so they would stop pushing it over on each other or knocking it over to mountain climb on it...
sigh.

Happy birthday to your girls!

 

QUOTE(Momto2es @ May 25 2009, 12:24 PM) [snapback]1327243[/snapback]
Our play kitchen caused a "bloodbath" too but they do get used to having it and it does calm down. It never fails though. It makes me dread bringing new things into the house because I just know it's going to mean trouble. (ooh, I just saw that our kids have just about the same birthday ). Anyways, time outs don't really work for us. I am going to get a timer because I hear they are great but what works for us is me saying "If you can't share (or play nicely, or stop spitting water from your sippy cup, or whatever) then I will take it away. And I do. And they know it.

I had to tie the play kitchen to my banister so they would stop pushing it over on each other or knocking it over to mountain climb on it...
sigh.

Happy birthday to your girls!


I had to laugh out loud about you tying the kitchen to your banister.

Thanks for your replies, things seem to have settled down a bit. But I will be firm with no biting and pushing and I will shut off the play kitchen if I have to.

 

We also use a timer for things they have to take turns with (especially the computer). Turn taking generally comes before sharing.
Don't buy another kitchen, they have to learn this.

 

QUOTE(dfaut @ May 25 2009, 09:55 AM) [snapback]1327105[/snapback]
I don't know what the answer is, but they have to learn to share. It's the nature of the beast, kwim? Why don't you try this - set a timer for 5 min. and let each have a turn for 5 min. Longer than that probably won't work with 2 yr. olds....so I would try that first. Then I would let them duke it out. At that age, my pedi told me to let them work stuff out unless blood was being drawn. If you see the action, you'll have to act as well. I started timeouts at 18 mos. strapped in the feeding seat, so I think they can do it at almost 2. BE CONSISTENT! If you threaten to take the kitchen away for a while, MAKE IT HAPPEN if they cross that line! Now is the time to instill in them that "Mommy means business" and will FOLLOW THROUGH!!! :hug:

Also....it'lll wear off - the newness....


Yep, all of this exactly! We are huge on taking turns!