Play dates with allergies...do you? Would you?

Tomorrow I'm hosting a play date with three kids. Two boys who play soccer with N, and one has a little sister Annabella's age. The brother/sister combo have allergies. She is a milk allergy, he is a peanut allergy. There may be more, but I know at least that.

Mom is super excited that I inititated a play date. Apparently he doesn't go on many/get asked on many due to his allergies(he's in second grade). She even texted her allergy therapist! I don't have any qualms about it honestly. Mom said from the get go she would stay(fine by me), as he's not comfortable yet solo with his allergies. Granted, I'm going through the house and putting everything away, as well as disinfecting the entire house. She's more than pleased. He is more cross contamination whereas she is more airborne(open a bag of Cheetos).

Would you ever host kids with allergies? Let your kid(with allergies) go on play dates? That makes me so sad for these kids! I can't tell you how excited they are to be coming over!

 

I would, but I would probably ask the parent to stay the first few times to observe so all of us feel comfortable, and to make sure ident miss anything.

 

I would and I agree with Jen, that I would have the parent stay for the first couple of playdates.

 

My girls have friends who have allergies and have had them over. My kids are super attuned to what other kids can and can't eat because of school (peanut/tree nut/dairy-free classrooms, etc) And the kids we've had over also know what they can and can't be near.

Hope all the kiddos have a great play date!

 

Yes.

One of my good mom friends' child had a peanut allergy. I had no idea as she didn't want to inconvenience me, at first. I felt horrible because I'd had pb m&ms on the way over to their house that day. From then on I went out of my way to clean my kitchen and serve food without peanuts with labels she could inspect.

Fortunately for this family her son grew out of the allergy.

 

I definitely would have them over.  Food allergies are something I would be comfortable working around and making sure I have plenty of snacks on hand they can have. 
 
If they were my kids that have the allergies, I would be nervous about letting them go with someone I didn't trust, and would probably stick around like the mom is doing.

 

I would but I have a kid with a deadly allergy.  And having your child left out of so many of life's events is hard on you and them.  Kudos for going the extra mile. 
 
As a parent unless I really trust the person as in a close relative or friend I would ask to stay until I feel comfortable.  It also helps take some of the burden off of you.

 

I agree!  WTG for making the invite and not backing out.  Food allergies can be extremely scary for the parent of said kid.  I have a friend who has a son who is deathly allergic to eggs & peanut butter.  She has had to do a lot of work through the schools to not make him feel left out and to protect her kid.  It's amazing! 
 
Having her stay is also a blessing.  (and an education)  perhaps sometime in the future she will not have to stay and feel totally comfortable, trusting them to be safe in your home.  Enjoy and make it fun!

 

I have had playdates with allergic kids lots of times.  Some, the parents have taken home after school & fed them a snack, then dropped them off, so there was no need for me to feed them anything.  Others, I have just been really careful of the snacks (usually I just go with fresh fruit, as that is usually pretty safe, depending on the allergy).  We have a close friend whose daughter has a peanut allergy and she plays at our house fairly often.  In her case, they just make sure to leave me an epipen, just in case.

 

One of my twins has a peanut allergy. He's only a first grader, so we haven't had any drop off play dates yet. But I know I'll be an anxious, overprotective parent when he has his first one. We've had their friends over to our house, and for now, I do prefer it that way. Though he's anxious to go to a few friends' houses and thankfully one of those moms is an RN and the other is a NP, so I'll feel ok about those. I always give family members a few brand names he *can* have and then that's what they buy. Makes it less stressful for everyone, including him most importantly. And obviously, I leave a 2 pack of epipens wherever he is.

Because of my experience with his allergies, I feel completely comfortable with having other kids with food allergies over.

And Meaghan, as an "allergy mom", I want to say a big thank you for being so cautious and caring! It means a lot and there truly are many people who just don't want to mess with it.

 

Play date was a success! His sister(anything from a cow allergy-as mom educated my kids), fell ill right before. But he still came over. Mom said he nearly pummeled his dad when he came home from work telling him all about the play date.

We ordered pizza from papa Gino's as well as buffalo tenders. I mentioned when ordering a nut allergy(he's peanuts/tree nuts). She went online to a site(maybe you know the site Jori) and checked to see if it was all nut free-of which it is.

He just had his mom serve him his food, get his drinks. His biggest worry/concern is cross contamination, as he knows not to eat the foods. I did wipe down all of the counters/tables/chairs/door knobs with disinfectant before they came over. I covered my bases there(and no but products consumed prior to).

So I will definitely do it again. I feel bad that these kids don't go on play dates.

 

It hasn't come up with any of the kids' friends yet. But I'd do it. And I'm glad y'all had fun! 
 
I remember having a friend with several food allergies when I was in middle school. She was allergic to eggs, nuts, and something else I don't remember now. She also had really bad asthma. The first time she came over, her mom came and went over how to work her breathing machine should she have an attack and also the rules with her allergies. It made my mom a little nervous at first, but by the second or third visit, it was just routine. We were best friends for a long time and were often at each others house. 

 

I have hosted kids with light allergies and I would have kids with severe allergies over but in thst case I would ask the mom to stay for the first couple of times to make sure I know everything relevant.
 
My brother's closest friend in elementary school had severe food allergies and he was at our house very often. His mom went over the rules with my mom and he always had a little backpack with medications, a short check-list and safe snacks with him, just in case anyone was not sure whether a certain food would be ok for him.

 

For me it would depend on the level of risk to the child.  We usually have the first playdate out somewhere like the park or beach and everyone brings snacks to share.  Then if I felt I could handle the necessary preparations, precautions, and emergency procedures, I'd be happy to have the child at our home. I can put away food products, vacuum, mop, clean surfaces, utensils and make sure we don't eat or use any allergen containing products that day.  I If there was too high a risk and I couldn't meet the standard of care necessary, we'd continue to have playdates in public places with the child's parent present.  I heard from a dance teacher about a student who was allergic to wheat.  Her mother wanted everyone at the studio to wash hands, faces and  brush their teeth before class and abstain from eating or handling any wheat products for 48 hours before coming in contact with her daughter. She said that eating anything containing wheat then going into the same room as the child could kill the child.   I wouldn't take that risk.

 

 
 
Now that's one allergy I could not accommodate. I wonder if this child can/does go out in public?

 

 
It does seem like she'd have to be in a bubble just to leave the house.