Pets

ETA: I really should have said "should WE get a dog!!!?"


I've spent my entire life as a cat lover and lost my 18.5-year-old cat to old age via kidney failure when my boys were 2.5 months old. It was a devastating loss because he was such an amazing creature! I miss having a pet and am really anxious to have another one now that the boys are getting older. I've been looking into getting a kitten/cat, but...

We went to a Bed & Breakfast a couple of weeks ago and they had this sweet old Cocker Spaniel who my boys simply fell in love with! Jackson's second and Jacob's third words were "dog" because of this sweetheart. Since we came back, I'm dealing with my boys' dog obsession. They LOVE dogs! Jacob found a stuffed dog at the toy store today (we were b-day shopping for them) and I've never seen him SOOO excited. He wouldn't stop saying "dog!!".

I had vowed to my DP that we would never have a dog... but now I'm considering it, for my boys, because they apparently really love dogs. I'm almost kind of excited about it. I'm thinking most likely it would be wisest to get a puppy and train it from a young age... but I'd love to hear opinions on that.

Am I totally nuts?

I had dogs as a kid, but obviously I wasn't the primary caretaker then. Would this be a really unwise move, heading into the second year of twin parenthood? I'd love to hear your thoughts, especially if you have a dog!

 

As much as I love dogs .. I'm not in a hurry to get one. First of all .. Jesse is allergic, but seems to do ok around my moms 4 dogs. Second .. my mom has 4 dogs. She lives downstairs and I think thats enough dogs for one household. Third .. housebreaking. Hate it. Hate cleaning up poop and pee and they do it EVERYWHERE.

I may reconsider when the boys are old enough to be responsible for taking it outside and walking it .. but until then .. NOPE.

I think if you have the time and patience to handle a dog .. then go for it if its what you really want .. or maybe even a nice older dog from the shelter ?
Either way you go, good luck on your decision.

 

You need to be aware of the time commitment necessary for a dog. If you were to get an older dog, and by that I mean a year old or more, you are talking it needing to go out probably 3 times a day (Do you have a fenced in yard? If not, guess who will be going out with him.) It will need food & water twice a day. Ideally it would need a good walk daily as well. Dogs also generally need interaction. They LOVE it. Fetch, petting, training him or teaching him tricks...all time consuming. You'd also, obviously, need a dog who is good with little kids.

I have both a dog & a cat and there is no comparison as to which is the most work per day. Its not the cat I'm scrambling home from work to let out. (We don't have a fenced in yard) Its not the cat wanting a walk or putting his throw toy in my lap cuz he wants to play. I absolutely adore our dog & am not meaning to imply that I don't, I just want to be clear to you regarding the work involved.

If you have the time & energy to put towards a dog, then I'd say go for it. If not, maybe find a friend or family member with one and go there until the kids are a little older.

 

I wouldn't *not* have dogs and cats around my kids. I love my pets, heck, they were here first! When I'm talking to the dogs, I lovingly refer to the children as "the bi-ped interlopers".

My suggestion would be to check with some local private rescues (not the ASPCA or Humane Society) and get a dog out of the puppy stage (at least 3-4). (I know a foster/dog trainer in phoenix who could probably give you some good resources for finding your perfect little fuzzy buddy.) If the dog has been in foster care, the foster parents would have a really good idea of their temperament around children and cats if you wanted to get another cat. Plus the dog would be fully vetted, up to date on shots and spayed/neutered too.

 

Umm...I love my dog but he is like another child. I wanted a cat, DH wanted a dog one of my good friend's mom breeds German Shepard's. A few years before the boys DH bugged to get a dog it was only me, DH and my SD so I caved. Honestly, I wouldn't mind NOT having a dog there are pros and cons to everything but for instance if we go on any sort of vacation he needs a babysitter, he needs to go out at least 5 times a day, he is cage trained so when the boys nap he naps if not he barks anytime someone walks by and the mail always seems to come when the boys are napping which gets my dog nuts, his dog poo needs to cleaned everyday or my neighbors would get a whiff of poo instead of fresh air. Basically, he requires lots of attention just like a kid. I only had a cat when I was small and there is a big difference between the two ...cats are really self -sufficient and dogs rely on their owner.

 

I think it would be better to wait. I have 2 dogs and a cat. I absolutely love my pets and wouldn't trade them for the world, but I find having 2 toddlers plus pets to be an overwhelming combination. If you give your dog the full attention he/she needs, that means daily walks, trips to the vet, buying premium food, heartworm and tick/flea protection, training classes and training at home - it's a LOT of time and money, which is hard to commit when you have 2 little humans in the house as well.

Also, I don't think a dog should be left alone with a toddler or small child ever - even for a second. I have heard many stories about the "perfect family dog" or new puppy biting a child when the parents had their back turned for just a minute. Usually this is because the child tried to hug the dog, or put their face too close to the dog's, or simply stood over them while the dog was trying to sleep on their bed, etc. The body language of dogs is totally different from that of humans and something we consider harmless could be interpreted as threatening to a dog. My dogs have been absolutely wonderful with the boys from day 1 and we've had no problems, but I am super vigilant about watching them together and managing their interactions with the boys. It's a lot of work.

Personally, I think waiting until your kids are age 5 or over would be a good idea. A pet is a lifetime commitment and it would be heartbreaking to have a give a dog back to a shelter if something didn't work out.

Michelle

 

I am waiting to get a dog until they are old enough to understand the responsibility that goes with it. They love dogs, and we talked a bit about getting them one for their second birthday, but decided against it. Basically, until they are older, I feel like a dog is just adding on a third child to care for.

 

oh my god, i LOVE my dog!!! She is a black pug named Piggy and my girls absolutely adore her!!!! They love on her and hug her all the time! She is 5 years old now and she is sooo good with the girls! She does "steal" their crackers from them every once in awhile. And she snorts and snores when she sleeps!

We do have a fenced in backyard, so all i have to do is just let her out a few times a day. She pretty much sleeps all the time unless the girls are messing with her. She is, of course, housebroken and out of the puppy stage.

I would suggest getting an older dog that is out of the puppy stage and that is housebroken. And maybe not a really large breed, unless you have a large house.

I love my pug, Piggy!! I definitely recommend a pug!!!

 

Heck. No.

If you are prepared to have another "baby," then yes perhaps you are ready for a dog. But they are so much work. We will not be getting a dog any time soon, although I would love to when they are older. But even then, with school, work, sports, etc., we may not have the time to commit to a dog. They are so much work.

 

I have two dogs--which were our BABIES before we had the twins. We took them on vacation, bought rediculous things for them, etc. etc. You get the picture. Before I had the babies, I couldn't comprehend these people who loved their dogs so much but them gave them away when they had kids. Now, I completely understand!!!!! I won't give my dogs up but it is another hastle to deal with on a hourly/daily basis. If I had it to do over again, I wouldn't have dogs with young twins--it's too much extra work.

 

If you really are prepared for the extra work of a dog (versus a cat) go for it!

I second the notion of an older dog...a puppy may be more prone to nip, wrestle, get into things, chew, and other 'puppy behaviors', plus housebreaking is NOT fun. An older dog you could already know temperment and there are many well trained , family type dogs available through shelters, resuces, and other groups.

We had 2 cats and a dog when the girls were born. One of our DDs developed severe dog allergies so we found a new home for one cat and the dog- she is/was an amazing family dog (low maintence, good with girls, did not chew, bite, followed simple commands) and it was VERY hard to find her a new home. I would 'test' the ideas and possible allergies with frequent visits or pet sitting a friends or neighboors dog. Our local shelter also does 'kids' activities (story and animals visits) every month for free...you may want to see if the novelty of dogs wears off for the boys. The price of boarding when you go on vacation that the dog cant go with you is also pricey. Dogs also get more shots/vaccinces than a cat.

I would totally go for it if you realize that it is a big time and money commitment. Pets are wonderful!


KC

 

I like dogs too but I am not getting one any time soon. I have enough going on with twin toddlers - I don't need to add dog walking, vet appointments, puppy training, poop n' scooping, etc. to the mix. Also, dogs limit your options in terms of vacations. Your boys are about to go through a phase of testing the limits in terms of hitting, pushing, etc. and I'm not sure you want a puppy added to the mix. But it's your call. I'm probably overly practical these days.

 

I must agree with many of the pps! Don't get a dog! I feel like I can barely keep my kids alive- our 2 dogs just add more to the mix. In fact, I told my husband that if he wants to have plants in the house, HE has to keep them alive. I have enough lives to worry about with our 3 girls + 2 dogs.
Good luck!

 

We have 2 dogs one since Dh and I have been together (4 years) and one that is a puppy. 6-8m old. I loved dogs before I had kids and Now that I have my boys thay have kinda taken a backseat to the boys and for that I feel horrible! We got our puppy for the boys so they had a dog to grow up with and they adore him. I think hes pretty cool too but if I could go back and do things differently I would probably not have gotten the puppy and kinda wish I didnt have the other dog either.

We dont have a fenced in yard but having a dog runner fixes the problem of always having to stand outside with the puppy. House training is a nightmare if you have kids our not but by the time they are 6months old they are usually fully trained and have many wonderful years left with a puppy. I also suggest training classes.

its great to get opinions but only you and your family can really decide if a dog if right for you.

Heres a thought. Why not contact a local rescue and see if they have a dog you can foster for a while to see how it fits into you day. Also keep in mind if you you are to go away on a vacation or camping or just overnight you have to have someone thats willing to take care of him/her when your not there.

Good luck with your choice. In the end its almost always worth it!

 

Here's my thoughts on it......

Dogs can sometimes be more work than the kids. At least with kids they wear diapers, kwim? We have 2 Labs & they are both really sweet dogs.....but they sometimes drive me crazy! The younger one has always had a habit of pooping every time we go somewhere. Luckily we have a truck, but it's still gross. It's a personal decision, though......and I know my kids love the dogs. Just today at lunch they were dropping food on the floor for the dogs! I wouldn't get a dog just for them, though, unless you really want it; you're the one who'll be stuck with all the work. Getting a puppy is nice b/c they don't come with bad habits or abuse. But I swear Gracie kept me up those first couple weeks more than the kids did! I would say just really look into different breeds, too & see what would fit with you & kids.

Do you have any friends with dogs? Or a dog park nearby? Maybe they could go & get their doggie "fix". I must admit, though, there's something almost magical between a boy & his dog.

 

No way. I have definitely felt very tempted to get a dog over the years (especially after those times when the girls really connected with one like your boys just did) but I know I just don't have the time or energy. At this stage, a dog would actually just take time away from my kids. Sure, he might be a friend and companion but they can wait a few more years for that.

 

I don't have a dog, and am not a dog person, but DH really wants one and I know we will get one someday. I'm making him wait until the girls are at least old enough to help with feeding, etc.

My SIL had a dog when their first child was born -- sadly, he died young (when my niece was only about 2), which is not what anyone would have wished, but my SIL said now that he's gone, there is no way she's getting another dog until her kids are a lot older.

Just to beat this point into the ground , dogs (and especially puppies) are a lot of work. Several of the people in my office got puppies in the past couple of years, and we essentially never saw them anymore (for after-work drinks or whatever) because they always had to rush home to deal with the dog. It's like having another child. I keep reminding DH of that whenever he starts threatening to get one soon.

 

I say wait to until the kids are older to get a dog. Dogs are a lot of work, and they are a potential liability around little kids which makes it hard. I've had dogs all my life, and we have two dogs now that we got before the kids were born. It is a lot of work making sure they are walked, groomed, and supervised around the kids. A new dog requires even more work because they can take 6 months to a year to get acclimated into your family (housetrained etc). I've had cats too, and they are very easy compared to dogs.

 

QUOTE(Shadyfeline @ May 28 2008, 08:03 AM) [snapback]796953[/snapback]
Umm...I love my dog but he is like another child.


It IS a lot of work (not quite as much as a human baby, but if you get a puppy, it is a baby too) - if you do get one I would get a small short hair breed. Like a dachshund. Something that doesn't eat very much and doesn't have big poop. And small short hair dogs don't stink and do that tongue out slobbering like big dogs, and you'll save money if you don't have to get them groomed. We have 2 dogs and the one that is my dog is a small dachshund mix and he is great with the babies - sometimes when he wants to fetch he brings the ball to them and drops it at their feet...LOL

 

Ditto pps - I'd be hesitant, for a lot of reasons. One, that dogs are just so much work. It really would be like another baby. Also, dogs tend to develop destructive behaviors (chewing, digging, etc) when they don't get enough attention - I know I don't give my cats enough attention, there's no way I'd have enough for a dog.

And there's the safety issue. As you know, toddlers just don't know how to be nice to animals yet. Pinching, grabbing, pulling, etc can all provoke an attack. Also, any sudden movement can trigger the prey chase drive in even a docile old animal, and toddlers are all about sudden moves! And dog attacks can be fatal to young kids, or at least send you to the ER. You'd need to supervise constantly.

If you do get a dog, I agree about going for an older dog. A good animal shelter will do temperament testing, where a dog trainer intentionally provokes a dog the way a young child would to see how the dog reacts. But then again some shelters will also not adopt pets out to families with kids under age 6, because of the liability issues (and because they don't want the animals to get tortured by curious toddlers!).

Do you have any friends with dogs? I wonder if the boys could get their dog fix that way.

 

Thank you to ALL of you for your input! You've helped to confirm what I really already knew... it's just NOT the right time for a dog. Maybe someday down the road!

Thanks again!