Me and the boys decided to go to Wal-Mart last week....(yes a week ago and I am STILL upset about this!!!) and this little old lady comes up to the cart and was looking at the boys, being completely polite, not touching, just saying how beautiful they are and how thin I am how did I do it....on and on.... No harm there. As I was thanking her, Peyton started to fuss a bit, so I reached out to hand him his sucky.... And thats when she saw one of my tattoos. Oh my GOD!!! (Its on my wrist) Now, keep in mind, I have quite a few tattos and most are visible in the summer.... and it was warm so I was wearing capris, a tank top and flip flops.... Her eyes about bugged out of her head and she was just staring at it!! Its really small, not a big deal... But she tried her best not to say anything about it. That is when Peyton threw his sucky on the floor, causing me to bend to pick it up, revealing the ones on my back (I was wearing a tank top) and the back of my neck.... At that point she just couldn't hold it in any longer and said "I'm sorry but I can't believe that as a mother you would be out flaunting self-mutilation" and walked away from me. As she joined her husband, walking away from me, with my jaw dragging on the floor I could hear her talking to him about it. I was just in complete shock! I mean, does having tattos make me a horrible person?? Because this is one of my outlets of personal expression I should hide them now that I am a mother???? I love every one of my tattoos and cannot believe that she said that to me!!!! Hopefully I am not the only one out there with tatts and someone else can relate to this. I mean I know that not everyone likes them, my mother gives me flak everytime I tell her I got one, but come on now!! Keep your opinions to yourself when it comes to something like that.....IMO anyway. I mean, my best friend, who is also my tattoo artist gets weird looks (hes covered!!) but thats to be expected I think, but this was just mean I think! Anyone else?? Shannon
I know how you feel! I dont have any yet, but I have a very good friendw ho does and her DH is covered in them. People just assumed he was some freak... he was really the youth pastor! :lol:
I'm so sorry she judged you like that. Too sad that you were a great mom in her eyes until she saw you had a tattoo, as if that would make you a bad person. :hug99:
I'm so sorry she said that to you!! I would be fuming too! :angry: My DH and I both have tats. So far we haven't run into anything like you did. But I'm waiting for it. I have both my wrists done, and never try to hide them, but for some reason they usually get missed.
QUOTE(gina_leigh @ May 10 2008, 07:22 PM) [snapback]766342[/snapback] I'm so sorry she said that to you!! I would be fuming too! :angry: My DH and I both have tats. So far we haven't run into anything like you did. But I'm waiting for it. I have both my wrists done, and never try to hide them, but for some reason they usually get missed. Thats whats really suprising to me... my wrists never get noticed!! In fact, I wrked with people for over a year before they got noticed!!! Some of my others are hard to miss, but they are all tasteful.... I mean, I have a butterfly on my stomach(NO ONE sees that one...lol) chinese symbols on my back, neck, wrists and ankle, the boys names and a heart, and a memorial cross for my father... does that make me bad?? No I don't think so anyway... I'm still furious!!! Shannon
I'm covered (and pierced in many places) and I have seen a few eyebrows rise. I was waiting for someone to say something about me getting my girls' ears pierced but I didnt pay any attnetion to the passerbyers. I have seriously toned it down since I had my girls (my hair is all one color and its natural!! ). I dont blame you one bit for being pissed! I would still be fuming as well! Some people are just ignorant and rude! I'm sure your tattoos are beautiful!
QUOTE(HeyThere @ May 10 2008, 06:53 PM) [snapback]766311[/snapback] I know how you feel! I dont have any yet, but I have a very good friendw ho does and her DH is covered in them. People just assumed he was some freak... he was really the youth pastor! :lol: YES!!! Lets hear if for a youth pastor with tats. I love it!!!
people in the expecting forum has heard all about my judgement stories. I have tats, small plugs, and a lip piercing. I got the juno effect comments... people thinking I was 15 or something ridicules (I am 29) more than destroying your body comments. One lady said I was ruining my life and should consider abortion. Here is that conversation: juno vent with pics (scroll down passed age guessing for story.) I can just say a lot of us here understand exactly how you feel. I definitely feel the pressure to look prim and proper now that I am a mom. I really just don't care. I am who I am, you are who you are. That is all we can be... happy in our skin as colorful as can be Let it roll of your shoulder... it is not worth the stress. It is just lame ignorant people, if you don't fit the mold of what they deem acceptable then they feel they have the right to voice their ignorance to make them feel more at ease.
I don’t have any tats because I can never settle on the one I want (and honestly even after having twins I am not a big fan of needles), but both my dad and uncle where covered (I miss them both very much) and my mom has a large one on her right arm she got last year for her 59th birthday. I have seen people give her weird looks when she has a tank top on but she pays them no mind. One time I asked her if it bothered her and she said “it is my body, I can do what I want with it and frankly I will probably never see those people again so who cares what they think. I certainly don’t.” My mom also listens to both country music and rock (her favorite singer is ROB ZOMBIE LOL) and has four ear piercing and says if she wasn’t such a wimp she would get more. None of these things make her any lease of a great mom or grandma, in fact my nephews love to brag to their friends about their “cool grandma.” The ink on your body doesn’t make you any less of a mom, any more then how big or small you are, or the color of your hair. She is just a cranky old betty with nothing better to do then be a crank. I wouldn’t give her a second thought. .
It's too bad that lady only saw your tattoos and not how great of a job you're doing. I'll be the first to say that tattoos are not my cup of tea, but that has NO bearing on what kind of parent you are, your skills and love are what matters. I think good mothers should be cherished, no matter what they look like.
Right there with you on that one... I have a tatoo of a celtic butterfly on my left upper arm..... it is really hard sometimes to engage in conversations with people who continually look at it (trying on the sly - but it is so obvious to me)... this makes me no less of a person or mother - sometimes I feel like yelling at them and telling them I am a great mother - am currently doing my PhD - and just because I CHOOSE to ADORN myself with BODY ART - and it is an expression of who I am - I am certainly no less of a person - Perhapds they need to take a look at themselves and their JUDGEMENTAL perspective..... I would much rather have a mother who is open minded rather than judgemental..... IGNORANT PEOPLE SH*T ME !!!!
I have tatts as well and I have not run into any negative comments. The worst I have heard has been about my 5 with a rose on my back. I was asked what it stood for an I told her my 5 kids. I was very preggie with the boys and she snottily said "well guess you should have had your tubes tied cause now you have to fix it to 7 and thats painful and expensive". No kidding! Now I have a smaller one right under it that says +2=7 with 2 small roses attached to it. I also have a dagger that looks like its stabbing me in the back (represents a bad period in life that I dont want to forget) and a ankh on my leg just above my ankle.
WOW. I would have said something, How rude!!! I don't have any tatts, but my DH does. He has a LOT. One arm in sleeved, has some on his back, chest, leg, other arm. PEople are ridiculous.
I have small tattoos that are hard for most people to notice. I too, would be very angry if anyone said anything to me. You didn't deserve that judgement. I'm sorry that happened to you :hug99: .
I don't have any tats....however they don't bother me on other people! Sorry she was such an old bitty! Keep on being a good Mommy and don't worry about her or any of the other "stupid" people out there!
I have two of them. I don't see it as self-mutilation. That is just absurd. Don't worry about the old lady. Little old ladies think a lot differently than we do. I think it is a generation thing. Dianna
I have two, one on my ankle and one on my low back...now that I am all done having kids I cant wait for another one possibly on my foot with the kids initials and I would love to have the one on my back re-done into something else and made bigger. Tatoos can be tasteful, little old ladies dont get it and who really cares what she thinks! You should have said I am a good mommy even with tatoos. Please try to let it go, you should not let people that dont even know you bother you.
I do not have any tattoos, but I do not think that people who have tattoos should be banned from having children! I think it was a ridiculous comment from a person who is obviously very ignorant and judgemental. I would not let it bother you.
I am so sorry that happened to you; why can't people just learn to mind their own business and keep their mouths shut? I got myself a tatoo for my 30th bday and plan on adding a flower and a butterfly to it in September to honor my girls for my 40th bday. Just because we are now moms does not mean we should not express ourselves, actually maybe because we are moms we should express ourselves, what a great lesson for our kids. People are just ignorant!
When I got my first tattoo my grandpa (who had about 9) told me that it was too bad that I had done it. He said, (and I quote) "now if you get arrested they will put you in the cell with the 'bad girls'." I said, "If i get arrested doesn't that make me a 'bad girl'?
QUOTE(alliandre @ May 13 2008, 11:28 PM) [snapback]772213[/snapback] When I got my first tattoo my grandpa (who had about 9) told me that it was too bad that I had done it. He said, (and I quote) "now if you get arrested they will put you in the cell with the 'bad girls'." I said, "If i get arrested doesn't that make me a 'bad girl'? haha very true
I have a big (fills the top right half of my back) colorful phoenix on my back that I had done right before going through IVF. It represented my struggles with infertility. I think it makes me a cool mom!! DH has a few large ones too. Go to the beach and you see more people with ink then ones without. Just a cute side story....I was in starbucks a couple days ago and the barista says to me "what's on your shoulder?" I looked down instantly assuming there was a cheerio stuck to my sleeve or some dried pears from breakfast. I didn't see anything so I said to her "where?" and she said "no, on your back. what's your tat of?" I started laughing because it was just so funny that my mom instincts were the first to respond to her question! People are weird....and make no sense. Angelina Jolie has tons of ink and she goes around the world adopting kids from orphanages. So she's a bad person?? What about that polygamist cult in Texas? I'm sure no one there has a tattoo, but they just removed the kids because of abuse issues. I will never fail to be surprised by how some people feel it's their right to say whatever they want to strangers. I just don't get it.
Holy Moly, did you run into my grandmother? When I got my first one, my grandmother called me trailer trash. Since then she has asked both me and my sister what other sins we have done to our bodies. My sister then whipped out her nipple ring. Do the kids ever stop messing with the piercings though? Both of mine keep grabbing my nose ring and pulling it out. I mean it's great that they're using the pincher grasp on it, but dang, don't pull it out!
Just remember that woman's comment tells more about HER than YOU. Don't waste your energy on her. You know who you are!---good mom, wife, person, etc. Lisa
