Parenting is getting hard!

Can I keep them little forever? Protect them from harm? Disappointment? Embarrassment? Please! Really, can I?!?

So...my boys. Five next month. N does soccer(three days/week/developmental program). A did soccer in fall/spring last year. Just not his thing. So we wanted to find something for him. He said he would try Tae Kwon Do. Tonight was his first class. We go and instructor takes him to the back to get changed in the bathroom. He required help. But he's quiet and very shy. Didn't ask(new surroundings, etc). I stayed at the front...hoping to give him room to spread his wings. Long story short, he was crying in the bathroom. He needed help(uniform was HUGE). He was alone and scared and didn't know what to do. All I wanted to do was scoop him up and run as fast, and as far as I could. But I couldn't. What would that teach him?

Get him to line up with others(this is called Lil Kicks, so I'm thinking...4-5 year olds). He is by far the smallest(of which others noticed and made comments on his size). Some kids were close to ten years old I would say. He's in line and observing what they are to do(obstacle course). We watch one chid demonstrate. I think to myself, he's going to have difficulty. I look over at him and his lip is quivering and he starts crying. My eyes well up with tears, but I have to hold it together in front of all of these strangers, and my child.

He sits with me, clearly upset, and I talk with him. Encourage him to try. And to do what he CAN do, and it's ok if he can't. One instructor is also going around with a pool noodle to make the kids pick up the pace. No bribing would get him to participate. Eventually the owner comes over and talks with him, to which he gets upset again, so he leaves him be. Time passes, and he comes back again.

Long story short, he pulled Anthony aside and worked one on one with him. Showed him how to stand, say whatever word it was, and to kick. And to put some strength behind it. And he did it. And he smiled. I wanted to kiss the man! Anthony really enjoyed it. And he even joined in the class the last five minutes or so. He was told to speak louder(soft spoken, but he is also receiving services for speech) and did it fine.

I talked with the owner, he hopes Anthony returns again. Said maybe we should come to more than one class a week. I don't know the point of this post. Lol. We were just talking it up so much, he got to do something on his own, and it started off so....bad. He came home and his siblings couldn't wait to see what he did, and he couldn't wait to show them. He walked around the house kicking and yelling whatever it is they yell. Lol.

Here sto hoping the next class is better. If not, we are trying out Irish dancing tomorrow, so there is always that. :good:

 

Meaghan, it is hard :hug: I know both of my kids are very uneasy about speaking up in new surroundings and I always have to tell them that it's okay to ask for help. Believe me the first lesson of anything that either one of my kids has done has been them standing to the side and watching. Usually the second time they do better and the instructors are used to working with little kids and always seem to know how to make them come around.
I would just prepare him for what to expect the next lesson and tell him that you are so proud of him for trying something new. My kids played T-Ball in the spring and so did our neighbor's little boy. Now this little boy is the most outgoing little kid I have ever met. I figured T-Ball would be up his alley and every practice and game he cried. He did not warm up to it until the last week and a half but his parents just keep bringing him and had him do what he was comfortable with. They reassured him and told him that he made a commitment to his team and he had to honor it, even if it meant that he just watched the game or the rest of the practice.
It does sound like since Anthony warmed up at the end of the lesson that each lesson will go better and better for him. It's really hard not to go in there and swoop them up but I found the more I stay out of it, the better off both of my kids are.

 

*hug* nobody every said parenting was going to be easy! Sean's....well.....we like to say he's athletically challenged He's done soccer and t-ball through the YMCA since he was 4 yrs old. But, a couple of years ago when they started coaches pitch, we could tell it was getting more competitive, and he was going to become a bench warmer pretty soon. So we had to start discussing different options, things to try.

I found out the YMCA was offering karate classes (Tang Soo Do), an instructor from a local karate class would come in twice a week for lessons. We discussed him trying, and while he wasn't thrilled about it, he agreed to at least try it for a month. It's pay by the month lessons. If he didn't like it by the end of the month he could quit.

Long story short, he's been in it nearly 18 months. This last testing, a few weeks ago, he broke a BOARD with his FOOT!!! His confidence level has increased, he's even led the class in stretching (the teacher picks a different kid to lead each lesson). And he broke a board with his FOOT!!!! He couldn't even ride his bike last year, but this spring, thanks to karate, he learned to ride a bike at 10 yrs old! His balance is better, he's stretching is better......the instructor is amazing with them! And it's a combined class, all ages (adult to 7 yrs old), all stages (white belt to green belt).....It's just been such a wonderful thing for Sean. He's very shy, won't really look at strangers let alone talk to them. But with his increased confidence in himself he's starting to come out of his shell some more.

It's soooooo hard to let them grow up and spread their wings a bit, but I have a feeling in a few weeks you'll be posting about how much FUN Anthony is having in his class!!