Pacifier pain

Just curious for those of you that have/had children who kept the pacifier past 1 year.

When did the binky love affair end?

Did you force the issue or did they give it up?

How did you do it if you did force the issue?

Was it horrible?

What prompted your decision to end the love affair?

Did you take it away before or after the transition to the big kid bed?

Boys are 22 months...they only use pacifier at night and at naptime. Usually, they sleep all night even if it gets knocked out of their crib in the night. But, recently they've been sick and waking if they can't find paci. I know when they're sick all the rules go out the window but guess it got me thinking about when/how we get rid of the binky. Never dreamed we'd still have it at almost 2 years!!!

 

I'm looking for answers too. I was ready to be done at 12 months and wish I'd have followed my instinct because now I don't know what to do except cold-turkey and that's going to be ROUGH!

 

I was just thinking of trying to look for threads like these. My boys both love paci's now... Jack has always liked them but Jacob didn't like them until about 2 months ago. Oh, how I wish I had gotten them out of the house sooner. Jake is now obsessed with them!

I HATED paci's when the boys were born and swore they would never, ever have one. Now... approaching the second half of the second year, I can't believe we are still going strong on this addiction!

 

My DD was a binky addict. She only used it during nap/nightime, but she really wanted it all the time, she would carry it around when she woke up. It got so that she would lose it when it wasnt in her mouth. I kept telling her that she was going to lose it one day and we wouldnt be able to find it. Finally I just took it and put it away. She kept looking for it and I just told her that it was lost. She spend a lot of time looking for it and even now, 6 months after we "lost" it, she will still ask about it, or talk about it. She will just ask if I have seen it, I tell her no and she goes on with life. I dont know if it was my telling her that it would get lost and then it happening, maybe that prepared her for it. I will warn you that there was crying involved, but I would just tell her that we had to find it and I didnt know where she had lost it. btw, she is almost 3 now and it was 6 months ago this all happened.

My old neighbor told her kids that they had to send their paci's to the hospital so that the new babies would have paci's. They wrapped them up in a box and I think that they took them to their next doctors appointment, so that the doctor could give them to the new babies. It worked really well.

I think that the key is to have them be involved in getting rid of it. They may not realize what they are doing, but rather than just go cold turkey, they have been involved in it!! LOL!!

 

QUOTE(twinboys07 @ Feb 2 2009, 01:06 AM) [snapback]1172305[/snapback]
I was just thinking of trying to look for threads like these. My boys both love paci's now... Jack has always liked them but Jacob didn't like them until about 2 months ago. Oh, how I wish I had gotten them out of the house sooner. Jake is now obsessed with them!

I HATED paci's when the boys were born and swore they would never, ever have one. Now... approaching the second half of the second year, I can't believe we are still going strong on this addiction!

Max has a dummy for naps and night but Ellie never has but he likes to suck on one now and again. Ellie is a 45-1 hr napper and the other day he did 1 half hours - and I found him with a dummy in his mouth!! I'm not worried about them yet - maybe give them a couple of more months - I don't let them have one during the day now and Max will sleep through even without it. Cutting the ends off is suppose to work.

 

Sarah had one from birth till age 2, and at age 2 the doc said to her "you need to get rid of the passy, it's not good for you", and so that afternoon I kept repeating what the doctor said, and assuring her that the DOCTOR, not me, had come up with the idea, and she gave it up cold turkey that afternoon. I expected it to be horrible, but she only cried like 10 mins the first nap without it, asked about it again that night, and then it was done and she didn't seem to care anymore. It was a lot easier than I thought it would be.

 

Well Naomi and Luke kept theirs a long time past 1 and I've found that I have quite a different oppinion to most people here, so I don't know how much use this will be to you, but I'll answer your questions:
When did the binky love affair end? They gave them up at 3 years 10 months old

Did you force the issue or did they give it up? They gave it up on their own. What happened was that one night N couldn't find the dummy (paci) she wanted so she went to bed without one. As she couldn't find it the next day she didn't use one then either (for nap or night). The third night their mum pointed out to L that N wasn't using a dummy any more and asked if he wanted to stop too, he said yes and that was the end of it.

How did you do it if you did force the issue? N/A

Was it horrible? No, it was one of the smoothest transitions ever.

What prompted your decision to end the love affair? Although we didn't decide to take it away it was something that their parents and I had been discussing (the need to force the issue). We were thinking of doing the paci fairy sort of thing-swapping the dummy for a present-but hadn't set a date or anything before they gave them up on their own.

Did you take it away before or after the transition to the big kid bed? After.

My feeling is that if they only use them at nap/night (and you said they usually sleep all night) then it's really not a big deal. If it was a different comfort item they used (blanket, sucking thumb) you probably would not even be thinking of getting rid of it/stopping the habit.

 

My kids had them until they were 3.5 yrs old. We got a lot of opinions on that! However, I don't really care what they think. The docs and dentist would tell me they really should give them up, but not for any documented health reason, just that they were too old. Their school didn't want them to have them either. They only used them for naps and bedtime. I figured they had thumb suckers at school, and kids were allowed to bring a lovey, so a paci wasn't that big of a deal. I pushed back, they caved, but I had to push back everytime they got a new teacher (which was more often than I'd like).

That said, DD had health issues for a long time, a night time cough, almost asthma (the doc wouldn't call it that but she's been on an inhaler for a couple of years now) and the paci was helping us all get a better night's sleep. Until she got her tonsils and adenoids out, and tubes put in, I refused to consider it. And now, the new research indicates paci's can help prevent SIDs, I feel better about allowing this addiction to go on. It made them fall asleep better, and sleep better. How is that bad??

In any case, after DDs surgery, and she had recovered and it seemed her problems were getting a lot better, we considered how to do this. I talked to the kids about it a lot, big kids don't use pacis, the babies needed them. The Paci Fairy would bring them a gift. I really built it up. I picked a Sunday morning and we put them all in a box and they got to open their Paci Fairy gifts (Twilight turtle/ladybug - plush animals that project starts on the ceiling on a 45 min timer for night times). DS took it the hardest and we cried together. At naptime, DD was the hardest. The next few nights were difficult, but once they were asleep, no problems. It was just that initial falling asleep that was troublesome. According to their teachers they had no trouble with naptime at school (not that they've actually napped at school for months now, they just lie there semi-quietly according to reports) After 3 or 4 nights, things settled down. I kept talking to them, and validating their feelings, and repeating that the babies had needed them and were so happy with them, and how proud I was of the kids for giving the babies their pacis. How Mommy and Daddy no longer had Pacis ("Mommy, don't you miss it still?" broke my heart.) But I felt the time had come and we stuck to it. They settled down. Both will ask about it, infrequently and less as time goes on. Repeat reassurances above. But they sleep just fine now, though it does take them a little longer to fall asleep.

Despite the trouble giving them up, it was shorter lived than I thought it would be, and the peace we gained from having them for those 3 plus years was worth all that trouble. Although DD now sucks her thumb/fingers and has horribly chapped lips a lot of the time, and DS has developed a fungal infection around his mouth and keeps licking his lips and surrounding areas making any treatment I render moot. I'd prefer the pacis back to this vicious cycle!

 

DD had a plug for nap/bedtimes until she was about 2.5. Then she wasn't napping when she should, so I warned her and then took them all away. I just never gave them back. She 'asked' for them a few times for the next few days but it wasn't a huge deal. I WANT to get rid of Evan's before a year, but we'll see.

 

I only worried about it interfering with speach so when she started talking over it in her mouth I took it away and told her it was only for sleeping. She was okay with that. She gave it up on her own with sleeping around 2.5yo. It was easy!
My pedi had a very laid back attitude about it and said it wasnt a big deal...so I went with that. This will be the same approach I take with the twins-they dont really say many words yet but once they start trying to talk with the paci in their mouths I will take it away for sleeping only.

 

A lot of people do suggest explaining it to the kids. My two are too young to understand that. However, I still want to get rid of them. Mostly, because I don't think they "need" them anymore and I hate buying new ones after we loose them. Plus, one of my DD's has a rash the shape of the binkie because it irritates her skin. I guess we will have to go cold turkey, because I don't know how you would "phase" it out of sleep. That would be confusing to not get it for naps, but get it for nighttime? We only use it for sleep.

 

I just got rid of it for my singleton 2.8 year old. He had some sort of sore in his mouth, and so it wasnt comfortable for him for a day or so, so I took advantage of that, but I regret it, although he doesnt ask for it, and is happy that he is a big boy, he can not soothe himself to sleep, for the past 2 weeks since he has gotten rid of it, he has been up until almost 10 oclock at nite, until someone gives up and lies down with him,

I would suggest, somehow transitioning your kids to some other sort of soothing thing before completely taking them away!

 

Hi,

My girls had their till they turned 2 (night time usage after 18 months or so) and they bit the nipple of their fav paci and that was it....they wouldn't take the new one just wanted that broken one. So now they still hold their totally battered paci in their hand when they sleep but not in their mouth.

So dont worry they will part from it themsleves.

 

My dentist and pediatrician both say no pacifiers after 2, so we start gradually weaning at 18 months, when the kids are only allowed to have them if they're in their beds (so, naps and nighttime). Shortly after their 2nd birthday, the pacifier fairy comes to visit, taking their paci's to the new babies and leaving a gift behind.

We endure 2 or 3 nights of trauma post fairy visit, but it's over fairly quickly. Best of luck!

 

My girls were about 2 1/2 when we decided to do it at that point they just have them in bed, but had got into the habit of holding one in each hand and one in the mouth, and if they lost one well they woke up. So we prepared them for a couple of days that we were going to send them away to the babies, we got a tin and let them drop them in and then sent them away. They asked for them for a couple of nights but nothing major thank goodness just reminded them that they'd gone to the babies.

 

QUOTE(ksugal @ Feb 1 2009, 09:44 PM) [snapback]1172133[/snapback]
Just curious for those of you that have/had children who kept the pacifier past 1 year.

When did the binky love affair end? Last Week

Did you force the issue or did they give it up? I did

How did you do it if you did force the issue? I took it away one night

Was it horrible? Not after the first 45 mins. my son Nick screamed for that long! It didn't bother David too much. After that ~ they didn't even miss them. They only used their binkies at nap & night times. They sleep a lot better now w/o the binkie falling out & waking them up. My son David can finally put himself back to sleep...Big Bonus!

What prompted your decision to end the love affair?I was terrifeid taking the binkie away but i figured it's better to do it now then to wait until they get older & LOUDER!

Did you take it away before or after the transition to the big kid bed? Before

Boys are 22 months...they only use pacifier at night and at naptime. Usually, they sleep all night even if it gets knocked out of their crib in the night. But, recently they've been sick and waking if they can't find paci. I know when they're sick all the rules go out the window but guess it got me thinking about when/how we get rid of the binky. Never dreamed we'd still have it at almost 2 years!!!

 

My DD is addicted to hers, but she knows the end is nearing. We will only let her have it at bedtime, but she sometimes sneaks them and when we find her with one she will spit it out with a guilty look on her face.

I really don't see the harm with it, it's not like she is walking around all day with it, so I don't make too much of a fuss about it. Just not a battle I am ready to fight right now.

 

When did the binky love affair end?: Two years and nine months old

Did you force the issue or did they give it up?: I forced the issue

How did you do it if you did force the issue?: We gave them Santa so he could give them to babies for Christmas

Was it horrible?: The actual handing over of the binkies was great and they never asked for them again. They knew they were gone for good. But the transition was very, very difficult for months. They were always super sleepers (7pm to 7am) and great nappers (1pm-3pm), thus generally happy kids. Their sleep habits changed dramatically, to where it was difficult to get them to sleep before 8:30pm. Plus their naps became a nightmare and when they did fall asleep, it was for just a short time. It took months for things to even out, but it eventually did. But it was super hard for awhile.

What prompted your decision to end the love affair?: Pressure from parents and lack of speech development. Our dentist had no problems with it, so we let them keep them for awhile. But they used them throughout the day when they were cranky or sad or fussy and it got to be an issue where they were not talking. Their speech was falling behind and I knew the binky was the main culprit.

Did you take it away before or after the transition to the big kid bed?: We were already in big kid beds when we made the transition. I am glad we waited. The binkies were the only thing that kept them IN their beds. (Out of bed = no binky, so the decision was an easy one to make.)

 

Just curious for those of you that have/had children who kept the pacifier past 1 year.

When did the binky love affair end?
It ended at about 2 years old.

Did you force the issue or did they give it up?
A little of both...
How did you do it if you did force the issue?
We gradually cut the tip shorter
Was it horrible?
It actually went very smoothly...it took a little over a month and at the end she was merely holding it and would say "paci broke." One day one of their headbands broke and I explained we needed to throw it away because it was broken. That night she handed me her paci and said, "Throw away, paci broke."

What prompted your decision to end the love affair?
We just felt 2 was an appropriate age. Since one was a thumbsucker we decided to wait until 2 when we could make sure the other could understood what was happening.

Did you take it away before or after the transition to the big kid bed?
before

 

My boys are still using them just for sleep, and I'v been thinking about when I should take them away also. My SIL got her son stop on accident. He was here one day and lost his paci, so we gave him one of ours. My SIL said she just kept giving him ours b/c it wasn't like his and he didn't like it. After awhile he stopped using it on his own. I'v also heard of cutting the tip off a little at a time.
After all of these posts I think I have decided to wait until the boys are old enough to do something like giving them away to other babies. I really like that idea! I feel like it would be almost crule to go cold turkey b/c they don't understand, and I am the one that got them pacis in the first place! I think it will be much smoother for us if they were in on it, and I wouldn't feel so guilty about it.

 

When did the binky love affair end?
It's still going on. :wacko:


Did you force the issue or did they give it up?
I'm going to force it soon.


How did you do it if you did force the issue?
We're going to say goodbye to them, and she will get a present for the binky fairy.


What prompted your decision to end the love affair?
Enough is enough!


Did you take it away before or after the transition to the big kid bed?
I plan to do it before.


Only one of my girls uses it, and it's only been for naps and nighttime since she was 9 months old. I tried to take it away a couple of months ago and it was awful!! She is so attached to the darn thing that no one slept for two nights, and then she got sick so I gave it back. I'm not looking forward to taking it away but it has to happen.