Pacifier myths or reality?

Well, I did it...I broke into the pacifiers yesterday while home alone with the boys. I just couldn't soothe them, and I feel like I caved in to yet another thing I didn't expect to. Maybe you guys can shed some light on whether the following is true (these are the reasons I didn't want to use them).

1) If you use them then you're not really listening to what your baby needs. You're just sticking something in their mouths to make them quiet.
2) They will tire themselves out sucking and not nurse as well.
3) They become overly dependent on them, you become a slave to the paci always trying to find the ones that fall out.

All I know so far is that they LOVE them. We have the Avent 0-3mo clear ones, and they're actually able to keep them in their mouths!

Are pacifiers just a reality of twin parenting?

 

Well, I did it...I broke into the pacifiers yesterday while home alone with the boys. I just couldn't soothe them, and I feel like I caved in to yet another thing I didn't expect to. Maybe you guys can shed some light on whether the following is true (these are the reasons I didn't want to use them).

1) If you use them then you're not really listening to what your baby needs. You're just sticking something in their mouths to make them quiet.
2) They will tire themselves out sucking and not nurse as well.
3) They become overly dependent on them, you become a slave to the paci always trying to find the ones that fall out.

All I know so far is that they LOVE them. We have the Avent 0-3mo clear ones, and they're actually able to keep them in their mouths!

Are pacifiers just a reality of twin parenting?

 

When my son is fussy at night it helps so much to sooth him, and if they use them at night my ped told us that it can actually reduce the chance for SIDS!! So i would not feel bad using them at all.

 

Like the pp said, my ped also told us that they reduce the risk of SIDS. My girls never took to them though.

 

I'm sorry, but all those notions about pacifiers being bad are nonsense... until children reach something like age 5, and then it can cause problems with teeth.
As far as it being a lazy thing to do instead of soothing them... it DOES soothe them. I always find it bothersome that there are certain adults (mostly in our parents' generation) who think nothing of indulging in any number of vices to cope with stress, yet they would deprive a baby of a soothing device. That is what a pacifier is: a way for them to soothe themselves when they get stressed.

Also, I understand most babies will turn to thumb sucking (every human being needs a way to calm themselves), which is much harder to break (you can't take a thumb away like you can a pacifier).

Most of all, give yourself a break! It isn't easy parenting any baby, much less twins. If something helps with that, and makes them and you happier, and it isn't harmful... why wouldn't you do it?

If you are terribly concerned about it being a bad habit, wean them off at 3-4 months. Before that, they really don't get attached to anything yet. But, again, you have to think about whether you want them hooked on a pacifier or a thumb.

 

1) If you use them then you're not really listening to what your baby needs. You're just sticking something in their mouths to make them quiet.

Reality-- For those who use them as a means to shut their child up and not deal with their child's actual needs, yes that is a reality.

Myth-- For those who use them responsibly and soley for the purpose to help their baby soothe themself, yes, it's a myth.

I personally use them for when I know my dd truly needs it...when she goes to sleep when she gets hurt, when we go to the doctors office or for long trips in the car.

2) They will tire themselves out sucking and not nurse as well.

Don't know the answer to this one as I don't nurse but...again, as long as they are not sucking on the darn thing ALL day then I can't see how that would be a factor. It never stopped my dd from taking her bottle and sucking is sucking whether it's mommy or the bottle. (I think?)

3) They become overly dependent on them, you become a slave to the paci always trying to find the ones that fall out.

Reality-- If they get used to it being stuck in their mouth everytime they whine or cry, then probably yes. It will become an even harder habit to break than if you use it appropriately. And yes, for a while you will deal with having to run in and replace it if you use it at night until they are able to find it in their crib on their own. It all depends on when you allow the use of pacis. If you decide that once it falls out then that's it then perhaps it won't become a habit but it truly is so nice in the middle of the night to just have to place it back in their mouth when they awake and watch them fall right back into slumber.

Myth-- Again, if you use it responsibly then I don't think they will become overly dependent on it. Yes, they will depend on it for the certain times they use it (going to sleep, after getting hurt and getting a boo boo, after a shot from Dr.) but, I think it's worth it.

I personally will deal with breaking the habit when the time is right. For now, it is the only way that my dd can soothe herself and she is very high strung and a very nervous baby. I didn't start giving it to her until she was over 2 months old. And it really put her at ease in certain situations (like going to sleep for which she used to scream when it was that time).

I say, do whatever you can to make your baby as comfortable and as happy, and calm as possible and deal with "habit" part of it when it's necessary. Just don't overuse it and I think in the end everyone will be happier! GL on your decision.

 

1) I feel like that a lot, but for me it was a necessary evil. It was either give him a pacifier while I tend to the other or he would just cry anyway. At least the pacifier was soothing. Only one of mine will really take it anyway. Now I only offer it when it's obvious that that is what he wants.

2) I never had a problem with that. In fact the pacifier made nursing much easier on me. Before that they would nurse CONSTANTLY. With the pacifier they would nurse when hungry because their need to suck was taken care of other ways.

3) Mine will cry when he's trying to get to sleep and it falls out. Once he's deep asleep and it falls out he doesn't care. He's pretty good at keeping it in now though, he can actually sneeze and keep it in.

 

The first two are absurd, I think. Unless, you just ignore your child completely. Yes, it can be a pain to "need" a pacifier when you can't find one. So have some extras on hand. It wasn't until my 3rd child that I heard about paci's lowering the incidence of SIDS, but that's wonderful. With my oldest, she was going to suck on something and so I continually took her hand out of her mouth and put the pacifier in. I didn't want a thumb sucker! My brother sucked his thumb until he was 5 and no amount of any of the "guaranteed" products worked to break him of the habit. It really was disgusting, too, as he'd get the nastiest sores on his thumb. Ew!!! My 2nd, didn't need much of anything. Only used the pacifier a little and only when very small. My 3rd used it like my oldest, and my girlies use it more, too (though one definitely more than the other). After about 16 months, I stop letting them have it except for naps and sleeping. I HATE kids talking around a pacifier. Major pet peeve. So all that's my .02 on the subject. I agree w/ PP's, give yourself a break and help your babies soothe themselves. They'll be happier and so will you, and you're obviously trying to do what's best for them!

 

Babies have a natural sucking reflex...obviously, and as long as you don't use a pacifier to replace food when they are actually hungry, go for it! Actually, one of my boys is a 'binkie' man, and the other is not so easily fooled. Also, it is a good idea to try not to use the pacifier as a tool to get them to sleep all the time. Then if they are too small to retrieve it on their oun when it falls out... your'e in troulbe. My personal favorites are the 'Soothies". I recently spent some time in the UCLA hospital and they gave us vanilla scented ones. New to me!

 

I don't believe any of those are true! If your baby has a real need, they won't take the pacifier for long. My Morgan loves his paci, but when he's done with it or he's hungry or has a dirty diaper, it pops right out...no matter how often I put it in. (Then I realize something is really wrong and work my best to fix it, ya know?) My Jonah on the other hand could care less about the paci most of the time. I think those babies with a strong sucking desire actually do better with a pacifier.

HTH! And, personally, I did the same thing about the same time as you. Sometimes you just need a little quiet. You're not ignoring your children's needs...you have to give yourself a break every once in awhile too!

Shannon