Overwhelmed

So now I'm 11 weeks. Yesterday we went to see the specialist. I just became so overwhelmed yesterday all I wanted to do was cry. Just thinking about all the stuff that is going to hvw to change and how are we going to do it on one income bee have to get a bigger place a bigger car everything for twins. Oh it was so stressful just thinking about everything. Were still in shock. Sometimes I
Feel like were going to go to the next sonogram and
There is only going to be one baby. I'm nervous about my health and hope this pregnancy goes well. But insane to be able to just let that all go and enjoy being pregnant with twins. Anyone ever feel like this?

 

CONGRATS ON YOUR PREGNANCY!!!

:grouphug: Oh honey you are SO not alone in feeling this way, it is TOTALLY natural and in my opinion it would almost seem unnatural to NOT feel overwhelmed when they become pregnant and especially with unexpected multiples. It's joyful, exciting, shocking, frightening, worrisome, and like you said - overwhelming. There is SO much to think about but you have to just remember, you've got time. You're 11 weeks right? You've got time to take it slow and easy and plan things out so that it doesn't feel so overwhelming.

I know how you feel about feeling frightened at each ultrasound that you will see one baby and not two, I was always scared of that but two where always there. The specialist will take good care of you, as will your OB so trust in them and if you ever feel like they aren't supportive of you then find a new one. You need to feel secure and at ease with what's happening, not scared and worried because that's not good for you or the babies.

Take it day by day. Try and stay positive and if you have to cry or get super hormonal do it. It's all normal and natural and those of us that carry multiples are a special, STRONG, group of women and we stick together because we all know how hard it is and how joyful it is!

As for the financial strain, yes that is terrible overwhelming and scary. You might wish to start scouting thrift stores, craigslist, ebay, yard sales, things like that to find furniture for reasonable prices. You'll figure it all out though. Somehow even the hardest things become so simple and they somehow work out!

Oh and word to the wise, and I'm sure MANY of us around here will tell you the same thing, STAY OFF THE INTERNET and NEVER try and google anything about multiples pregnancies (what to expect, what can go wrong, etc.) it will just make things worse. If you are worried about something or have questions just ask the ladies on TS.

:youcandoit:

 

I think everyone is a little overwhelmed at first, even those of us who planned it with fertility treatments. At some point we realize how different this will be from a singleton and it is overwhelming. For me it helps to focus on the end result of my little ones arriving healthy. I alos like to read a lot both books and on line so I feel like I know what to expect and don't get thrown for a loop everytime I am at the doctor. I know that would freak some people out but it helps me.

You still have a long time to prepare. Maybe you need to talk a month and just not worry about all the changes and just absorb the whole twin aspect and then come back ready to deal with it all. You can do it. Take some time just to relax.

 

I know how you feel! I'm only a little ahead of you and struggling to find the joy and excitement, but I'm getting there slowly! I think once I know the genders and we can discuss names it will be easier. With DD we had a boy and a girl name picked out almost immediately. Now we still have the boy name but are struggling with a second and two girl name options, so we had to stop. We name after people and it's hard to decide what combinations we like in both English and Hebrew.

As far as stuff for the babies, just take it slow and come on here to find real advice on what you need two of and what can wait so you can spread out the cost. Twins can share a crib for awhile if you need to have just one for now and split them up later. Some cars will take more carseats than you think they will, if you do some research you may find that your car will hold 3 across. Mine won't so we are getting my car detailed and will sell it and use some of our baby savings with that money to get a minivan.

Just remember to breath, when the babies are born all they really need at first is you, diapers, wipes, a little bit of clothes, food and place to sleep. All the rest of the stuff can come later.

 

Congrats on your twins! I felt EXACTLY the same way. It took a while for me to relax and accept there were 2 in there. I found that talking to other twin moms really helped. All our plans went out the window when we found out we were exepcting twins...we were a week away from buying a new car and ended up having to cancel the deal and buy a van instead! We thought the financial investment was over after the first one and then needed a second of everything! I have gotten very good at finding great second hand deals and shopping consignment. I have also set up a network of moms with twin girls who are older than mine and I buy their clothes/toys when they are done with them.

It took me a while before I was truly comfortable talking about having twins so take your time. You have lots of time to let it sink in. When you're ready start looking into the recources and support in your area. TS is great so you're off to a good start!

 

I felt the same way. It was a mixture of sentiments, i was happy but then I start thinking about in the financial stuff, and I got scared.

I will try do some work at home because it's impossible I work after the babies born. I couldn't afford babysitter for 3, if i went work was just to paid the babysitter so we decided that I will stay home and take care of the kids and then when they go to school I could find a part-time!

we move to another house and it's been crazy, too much money going out and nothing to save!!!!


congratulations on your twins

 

Definately overwelming. One thing I did was take some quiet time and write down all the 'stuff' I needed. It was a long list to start but a lot of it we really didn't need and a lot was given too us. Once we had our list we talked about it with everyone and people would just say "Don't buy that we have an old/spare/extra one of those" It's nice too have new but babies are grown out of stuff so quickly that most things were like new. It made me feel more in control and organised. The only major with us was a car. We had just bought a 6 seater then found out it was twins!!! Luckly we were able to trade it in for a van and there was no extra cost. Emotionally I think it continues to surprise you all the time even at 8 months. Overwelming yes, but those two smiles are filled with joy. Take time to relax, be with your partner and dream. Good luck

 

Thank you all so much. I'm going to go week by week and try to tell myself to not get overwhelmed this week and just enjoy the beginning of my pregnancy. If that doesn't work then I will go day by day. I'm the type that wants to just go out buy everything now just so I know we have it all. But I know with family and baby showers I shouldn't. Just have to tell myself one day at a time.

 

I found it hard to not just get things done now, too. Twins can be very overwhelming as they do change plans quickly. I found it helpful to make a list of what I needed everyone, including me, to do. So DH had a list, good friends had a list, I had a list. Seeing those things (like painting a baby crib) getting done was really rewarding.

I also second Craigslist. If you want it, you can usually find it. Consignment stores are good for some things as well. Most stuff they have is useful for 6 months or less. Why pay 2 or 3xs as much?