one twin gaining and the other isn't...

jack is gaining weight with no problem..eating like a champ...i'm not sure exactly how much he weighs, but he's almost too big for all the newborn sized clothing...abbey, on the other hand, just isn't gaining like her brother...we went to the ped today for james and i asked the ped to weigh abbey and she is just now back to her birth weight of 6 pounds 8 oz, with her clothes on...almost 2 weeks ago, she was at 6 pounds 4 oz with no clothes on...they will be 4 weeks old on friday...jack is basically exclusively breast fed, usually doesn't even get a bottle, unless daddy is feeding him....abbey gets more from a bottle, breast milk and soy formula...i do try to have her nurse, and she seems to do all right with it...she does well with the bottle too...she spits up more than jack does after eating, but it seems to help if i burp her, even when she nurses...does anyone have any suggestions about how to help her "plump up" a bit? i thought about cereal, but i think it might be a little early for that still...waking her up so she eats more often doesn't work, we've tried...when she starts to fall asleep while nursing or with the bottle, i'll nudge her and get her to wake up enough to keep eating some more...right now, she eats during the day almost 4 hours apart, but at night it's more like 2 hours apart...

 

is there a reason that the babies are eating differently? breast vs bottles?

as for the 4 hour feeds during the day, that sounds really far apart to me... Ours didn't get to 4 hour feeds until way closer to 4 months. I fed pretty much on demand it was was 2 to 2 1/2 hours for a long time. (though by 8 wks they were sleeping at least 8 hrs at night... so I think that's why they ate more often during the day, so that they could get in their typical ounces). I will say just for your sanity, if you feed closer together during the day, she might sleep longer for you at night... maybe the 4 hour stretches... If there isn't any bf'ing issues, I would suggest bf'ing only. There are several studies that show that bf'ing babies are on the average a little above the formula fed babies up until 6 months, then they tend to slow the gaining down.

hopefully you find something that works for you.

 

The #1 thing you can do to get that baby gaining weight is to feed more frequently. Every 4 hrs is way too far apart. Try every trick you can think of to wake her up to eat and keep her awake - strip down to a diaper, cold wet washcloth on the neck, comb out cradle cap, play with ears/toes, etc.

Cereal would not help, and would actually make things a lot worse. Unlike your milk (and formula), it is not balanced nutrition, it is low calorie, and it would take away room in her tummy from the good stuff she needs, and she's not even able to digest it yet anyway. The AAP recommends starting cereal at 6 months, for these reasons and plenty of others.

How much is she nursing? Is she on bottles most of the time with some occasional nursing, or vice versa? If she's nursing more than just once in a while, it would be worth having a LC check things out. She might be having some trouble nursing efficiently, and a little help with the latch could make all the difference in the world.

And one more thought - if she's spitting up quite a lot, you might want to ask the pedi about reflux.

 

that is feeding on demand and she WON'T WON'T WON'T wake up to eat more often so it's not even an option...i've tried...

 

don't take this the wrong way, but I've read that we have to teach our babies when and how to sleep and eat etc. hopefully with some coaxing you can get her to wake up and feed at closer intervals - which will help her gain weight.

As for the cereal issue... I have a friend who's baby is only 7 weeks old and he's a little chunker and eats almost 40 ounces a day... she mentioned starting him on cereal, she is going to talk to her pedi... but how she decribed it was that the cereal is supposed to make him feel full... but without the calories (like the pp said)... I had never heard that. for him it'll work like a pacifier vs. the formula he's on... it will help him to feel full w/o him gaining extra weight. anyway, for you, cereal is not a good option b/c its not as fattening and isn't nutritious to replace breastmilk/formula.

i hope you can get your dd to feed on a better schedule/routine soon so that she can catch up to her brother.

one more thing... the books I liked at this stage were:
BabyWise and Baby Whisperer. I also liked Happiest Baby on the block, but he doesn't go into feeding I don't think. And later on I read Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child.

I really liked The Baby Whisperer, she seemed very down to earth and had good logical help for me. Maybe she can give you some tips on feeding your dd on more of a routine/schedule and getting her to wake more frequently...

 

Ditto all of this. I agree with having an LC check things out. I also think the supplementing can hurt not help the issue. Can you try to just nurse her? I would never give a baby that small cereal. Never. When you try to nurse her during the day and she doesn't wake, do you do things like hold a cold wash cloth to her face, change her diaper, get her in the full light? She may have her days and nights switched up if she's waking every 2 hours at night, but going 4 during the day.

 

I totally agree with the spirit here: get that baby waking up more often to eat. But just a note of caution to the OP - these books are all about getting babies to eat less often, not more often. For example, the whole "EASY" thing (eat, activity, sleep, you time) by definition limits the amount of feedings, since it puts the ix-nay on nursing both upon waking and before sleeping. Babywise is also all about scheduling. And both books put a lot of psychological pressure on you to feed less often, because supposedly you'll be "creating bad habits" and causing sleep problems by feeding more often.

And all this baggage would NOT be helpful right now! If your little girl starts waking a bit more to eat, the last thing you need is authors making you doubt yourself for feeding her more.

(Btw, totally agree with Happiest Baby on the Block and HSHHC, though they're not about feeding.)

Anyway, when you say she won't wake up, what sort of things have you tried? How often does she get a bottle, and about how many oz does she get by bottle per day?

Agree with pps about trying to just nurse, since your milk has more calories than formula. One plan that you might want to try would be to transition to more nursing, but fortify the bottles to make them higher-calorie. But BIG disclaimer here - you would definitely want to talk to your pedi about this.

 

actually the reason I mentioned Baby Whisperer, was because she suggests a 2 or 3 hr routine at that age... not a 4 hour one... and it seemed like the baby was sleeping 4 hrs during the day. anyway, I just remember the book suggesting that a 4 hr day-time feeding routine was for older babies, closer to 4 months old... It is true that I did follow the EASY schedule, and did not nurse before naps, one reason I took to heart for that, was the the book suggested the baby to get "full meals" at a feeding, and not quick "snack" type ones... for us it worked to just feed after waking from a nap. I hope you can figure out what works for you to get more feedings in etc.

 

Big ditto that 2-3 hrs would be very appropriate at this age.

The bolded parts, though, are reasons why I'd caution any BFing mom about this book. A 4 hr feeding schedule for a 4 mo old BF baby is dangerous, to say the least. (In fact, there was a mom here who put her 4 mo olds on a 4 hr feeding schedule, and they stopped gaining weight for a whole month until she switched back.) And the whole snack/meal issue also shows some ignorance about how BFing works. Less frequent feeding means slower milk production and less fatty milk, and ultimately lower supply. More frequent feeding means faster milk production and fattier milk. Babies who eat more often get more, and more of the good stuff. It's not just "snacks," those ARE the meals. Waiting longer between feedings so that the baby will get a "meal" actually accomplishes the exact opposite sometimes. Also, breastmilk takes 90-120 min to digest, whether the baby is 4 wks or 4 mo.

I'm not picking on you, Maybell - just cautioning the OP that some books offer uninformed and dangerous advice about BFing. You've obviously done a great job with your babies!

 

she's peeing and pooping well...and she is gaining, just not nearly like jack is...i've been pumping for the past 12 hours because my nips have been too sore to nurse and what we've learned is that jack eats more, somtimes twice as much, as abbey does and she eats at least 2-3 ozs each time...having such an obvious difference between the two of them makes it harder not to worry...i have to remember that comparing her to jack, and even my now 3 y.o. izzy, isn't helpful to her...the boys seemto be mooses and she's a tiny thing...jayden, my next youngest girl, is 7 now and i don't remember what it was like when she a baby, but i know that right now she's on the "smaller" side of things, taking more after me and my mom (at least stature wise now that we are "older") thanks for the advice, we are going to keep feeding on demand and te cereal was a temporary thought in passing, nothing more

 

You're totally right that small size is nothing to worry about! Grown-ups come in sizes XS-XL, and babies do too. Rate of growth is all that really matters.

And her weight gain is a bit concerning. She's only gained 4 oz in 2 wks, and some of that gain might be just from having clothes on. Average weight gain for a BF baby at that age is about 6 oz/wk. (source) A week or so of low weight gain isn't necessarily a problem, but two weeks of gaining almost nothing does raise a red flag, especially so young. I don't want to scare you, but it really sounds like something needs tweaking.

Good luck, & please keep us posted on how things are going!

 

What you said is very interesting.... I never "really" had any "issues" w/bf'ing, so I didn't ask many questions. I will say when reading that book, I noticed that she rarely mentioned breastfeeding... somehow I didn't know about the more frequent nursing = faster & fattier milk production... For us, around 4 months it seemed to work out that the babies would sleep long enough to go the 4 hours... a few months ago (maybe at 13 or 14 months) it seemed that I didn't have enough milk for evening after feeding them a couple of hours earlier, so I introduced a soy bottle after their nap... now I'm wondering if I should just start nursing before & after their 2 hr nap... good food for thought. thanks for explaining bf'ing how you did.

for the OP/serialmommy... have you gotten lactation help? you mentioned that your breasts are hurting... hopefully you can get that resolved and hopefully your dd will wake up to feed more frequently. good luck with keeping everything working.

 

i pumped all day yesterday, and i'm back to nursing today and things are going ok...i'm watching the time a little more closely and i'll be waking, or at least attempting, abbey every 2-3 hours during the day...she goes in for an appointment on the 9th of sept, so we'll see how her weight goes in the next couple of weeks...

 

sounds like a good plan... not sure if the "time gets away from you" or not... but lived by my little "Itzbeen" machine... its a little machine with 4 timers that just start counting minutes. So you can see how long "itsbeen" since diapering, feeding, nap etc. there's even a little toggle button at the bottom to switch for left/right breastfeeding... I just tracked on of my twins and it helped me be able to switch babies the next time. good luck. hopefully she will gain lots of good weight by your appt.

 

i'm making sure to pay closer attention to the time, especially when abbey eats, and then figuring out right then when 2-3 hours will be and i keep watch..we have a lot of clocks in the house, i'm a clock watcher by nature anyway..so far today she's doing about 2 1/2 hours on her own without me needing to wake her...i think part of why she would go so long between feedings is she would stay awake after she ate and then fall asleep for 2-3 hours...so i'm making sure to keep track of the time she ate, not the time she fell asleep

 

Let us know how it goes! Remember, 2-3 hours from the time she last STARTED to eat, not when she finished.