one month old and no sleep

Our boys are almost four weeks old (born at 37w) and we are a tired, tired bunch. One night Joe won't sleep, the next Ted won't sleep. Its incredibly frustrating. And soul crushing.

We are going to make a chart to figure out when they are sleeping.

And they often will not sleep unless we are jolding them. I feel like this is a bad habit, but then I hear they are too young to spoil.

What did you do that worked?

 

At one month, I did what ever worked. Right now you are in survival mode and they are definitely too young to spoil. I think making a chart is a good idea to figure out their sleep patterns. At that age, both of mine still had their days and nights mixed up...so we kept them downstairs during the day with our curtains wide open, TV on normal volume and going about our daily activity even while they were sleeping. Then at night we closed the curtains, dimmed the lights, spoke in low voices with the TV office and took them upstairs to go to sleep for the night.
Also my son could not go to sleep right away in the crib, he started his night out in the bouncer, so I strapped him in and then when he woke for his first night feed, I would do that feed and then put him in the crib with his sister and he slept fine. My daughter did not like the bouncy seat and preferred to be walked around when it was bedtime (but did fine going back to sleep after night feeds).
Sleep will come, hang in there :hug:

 

I agree with Nancy-they slept wherever, whenever at that age! I think making a chart will maybe help you see a pattern of sorts. You can not spoil them at this age. They've been nie and warm, and tight, inside you for nine months. Now they are out in the wide open, so a little security is good for them! What worked for dh and I was to take shifts. I slept from 8p-2a and he slept from 2a-8a. Or-you and dh could each have a baby one night and then rotate.

Don't worry though-the sleep will come! I promise! Have you tried swaddling? My boys were big swaddlers-it's almost like they were in the womb again...Good luck! :hug:

 

The best thing you can do is make sure they are eating at the same time during the day. And wake them at 3 hours if they haven't woken on their own to eat. Then when you put them to bed at night, let them wake you rather than sticking to the 3 hr mark but when one wakes, feed the other too. I would let them sleep in swings or bouncies if it means they actually sleep. If they are overtired from not sleeping, they'll have even more trouble settling down to sleep. Swaddling can be a huge help. I wouldn't worry too much about where they are sleeping right now. Get them eating together every 3 hrs all day with some sleep in between, then when they start sleeping more consistantly during the night you can move them to the cribs. My two slept okay at night in the cribs right off the bat but during the day they wouldn't sleep unless they were in the swings. Do what works right now with a focus on changing things a little at a time to get to where you want them to be in a few months. Babies learn what we teach them. :grouphug: I know it's tough but you can do it!

 

I couldn't agree more. We were swaddling swingers, too. :ibiggrin:

 

This is exactly what I was going to say! If you can make sure they are eating at the same time, usually the sleeping will follow.

 

Right now, we're making sure that we feed the boys at least every three hours, sometimes more often, but we always feed them together even if one baby is sleeping. During the day, we keep them downstairs, not swaddled, lights on, TV on, etc. At night, we swaddle with a sleep sack and then a blanket like they did at the hospital. So far, sleeping at night has been ok (they aren't napping at the same time during the day, but I'm not worrying about that right now), but my boys are still in the sleepy stage, so it may change.