OK, I have an odd issue

Michael Jackson is dead? After MJ died, I got all nostalgic as some of us probably did, and started playing his music for the kids, solo and Jackson 5 stuff. They REALLY love the Jackson 5, watched video clips on You Tube, love the pictures in the Rolling Stone MJ commemorative issue. So first it was explaining that MJ was a little boy when he sang those songs, and then the other ones are when he was a grown-up. Well, now they are a bit fixated on Michael Jackson. Wanted to know how old he is now (50), where does he live (I said California), can they go visit him (no, we don't really know him), can we invite him to our b-day party (same answer). Oh, this started with "Is he real?" as they know some TV/movie characters are not real, like Dora isn't real, etc. It's all very cute, but now I'll feel like such a bad guy telling them that he's dead! Like why did I introduce all this, and he's dead. I didn't think about that.

They do know about death, one of our cats died a few months ago, and they know that MIL died before they were born, that's why Daddy doesn't have a Mommy any more.

What would you say? Or would you even tell them?

 

For us it was a great way to start talking about drugs. Medicine your body needs versus medicine you want. (My kids love the chewable vitamins and want to eat them like candy, so that was our starting point.)
I tend to be pretty straight foward with my kids so yes, I would say exactly what you told us. You started listening to his music as a kid and when he died it brought back all those memories of enjoying his music, blah blah...... I'm not sure how to have this follow what you've already said though.

 

Yeah I probably should have started with that, just didn't realize it would be a "thing", and they kind of caught me off-guard with the questions. I'll just have to tell them. I think the "too much medicine" thing is a good idea. Mine also love medicine and if one is say getting some Tylenol for a fever, the other wants some, they love their vitamins, etc.

 

I don't know if I'd introduce the "too much medicine" concept, but maybe that's just me being lazy and not wanting to deal with the inevitable 10 million questions. I'd probably just say something like "He was alive when I was a teenager" (mine are fascinated with the concept of teenagers in general, and with the idea that things were different when Mommy and Daddy were younger) but he died recently. If they asked why he died I would probably just say he was very sick. (So far, they haven't seemed to worry too much about the connection between being sick and dying -- i.e., they don't worry that they're going to die if they get a cold.)

Re: the "is it real" questions -- Amy phrases it as, "Does Dora live in the world?" "Yes" means she's real, "no" means she's a fictional character. I'm psyched that they're (sort of) getting a handle on this concept!

I love your new avatar pic, BTW.

 

My boys LOVE his music... they also like watching the news, so they saw it.

 

Aww... thank you!

That sounds like a good approach. Mine have also been fascinated teenager and high school too, when was I in high school, when do they get to go to high school. Gave me pause to answer "Mommy when were you in high school?" with "20 years ago." Yikes!
They do understand the sick/dying thing from our cat. Thanks!