My two year old has fallen deep into the terrible twos and is driving me insane. She is anal, possessive, whiny, tantrumy....the works!!! I spent the whole morning telling her to stop, quit whining, leave her sisters alone etc etc what do I do???
Sorry no help here either, but if it's any consolation, I have it times 2 and they're not even 2 yet!
I do not have any first hand experience but my dad who studied child development always said that the twos are terrible for two reasons. 1) frustration because they can't yet fully express themselves 2) desire for more independence the first you can't do anything about, but maybe there are ways you can help her feel more independent, more like the BIG sister... doing things for herself or helping you... just food for thought not sure that helps you in any way
My ODD drives me up the wall with the whining. One of the few things that I have found that really and truly helps is making sure she is getting enough sleep. It ties into the frustration thing mentioned by a PP because when she is well rested, she is better able to express herself and less likely to get agitated or frustrated - which tends to build on itself. Unfortunately, I don't have any advice beyond that. We still deal with whining daily. It has gotten to the point that I created a rewards chart JUST to deal with the whining. And it still hasn't gone away (though there is improvement in duration if nothing else).
:hug: I ignored tantrums...as long as the child was in a safe spot, they could tantrum away. It was so hard to do but I learned the more attention I gave it, the worse the tantrum turned out to be. With the whining (which I still deal with with my son), I would tell the kids that I can't understand you if you don't talk in your big kid voice.
It's so funny because I used to teach this age and I KNOW all this stuff. But I forgot all about it! Will start working on it all. I wish I could use the 'I can't hear you' line, but I don't think she would know what I meant.
I totally understand your frustration. I have been there. They got better now. As soon as they can express themselves and communicate more, it gets way better My kids can tell me if they are sick, where hurts, they are happy, tell stories, what they like/dislike,..I always have little talks why they are not happy and act badly. Time out has been reduced traumatically here. And everyone is happy Other things are very important are solid schedule (nap/bed time is the most important), more outside activities (they have gymnacstics class, and will be in indoor soccer in jan, museum and park, playground time). Next one is daily chores. They do collect their dirty clothes and bring them Into the kitchen (we still have gate between kitchen and playroom so they can't access laundry room), collect trash in their play room, organize toys (not master this yet), help out with changing pillow cases, beds,.. Some they actually can help. Some not really. But chores really boost their self confidence and independence, also make them so proud of themselves. Another importance is friendship. Everybody needs friends. So do 2 yr old toddlers. Also Everyday, I make sure I spend 15 mins with each of them to understand How they spend their day, their feelings,.. It just becomes a routine for us. And they just come and tell me all and all about how they got booboo, or they are upset bc...,they like this that,..It works out the best. Yelling, screaming, spanking just Make them more stubborn and rebellious. It is still the work in progress. But all the chaos, fights, tantrums have been reduced like 70-80%. Hang in there and good luck!
