Not close to STTN at 11 mos old

OK, I really could use some advice!

Our b/g twins are 10.5 months old and wake 2-4 times each between bedtime at 7pm and 6am. They consistently wake at 10 or 11, one for a bottle & one for a snuggle. Then they are up alternating hours between 1 and 4, sometimes for a bottle and sometimes not. We can rarely just get them back to sleep by rubbing backs, and ignoring one turns it into a screamfest that wakes the other baby.

We were OK with the 6am wakeup, but DS has gradually been getting up earlier over the past week, now at 4:30 am for the past 2 days. He wakes DD, and she can't get back to sleep. I told him this was not OK, but somehow he didn't listen

They have been teething, but I think they are out of that right now. We only have a 2 bedroom house, so separating them isn't really feasible. And I am not a fan of CIO. On a friend's recommendation, we tried a couple of weeks of feeding them rice cereal in their bedtime bottle. It seemed to work great for 3 nights, and we had hope that they might STTN, but they have actually backtracked from that point.

Help! We're exhausted, and it feels like they should be able to sleep longer now. They are good eaters and nappers during the day.

TIA! - Susan

 

:hug: I hope you get some sleep soon.

I did CIO so I don't really have any advice.

 

That sounds EXACTLY like what mine were doing at 7 months and we decided to do CIO. We had been doing the rice in the bottles since 4 months and it did nothing. I know you're not keen on doing CIO but I was so tired and didn't know what else to do. It worked for us, but hopefully someone will have another option for you.

 

We had to let them CIO also. It was the only way. I think they get so used to seeing you at night that for them to give it up on their own would be difficult unless they are forced to do so. Good luck, I'll also be curious what the other posters say.

 

You know, I had the exact same issue. In fact, I was literally wondering if I would lose my mind and suddenly it all clicked at the same time. They went from waking up multiple times a night, to STTN within a week. I had always assumed they would wake up less and less until they weren't waking up anymore, but it didn't really happen that way. Here are the things I did to encourage them towards the ultimate goal at the end.
1) would only go to them if they cried for more than 5 minutes. This eliminated almost all of the waking up right there.

Are you nursing or bottling?

- for my nursing baby I would only nurse him for a few minutes and then lay him back down. I decreased the amount until he was only nursing for a few minutes.
- for my bottling baby, I reduced the ounces I was giving her in her bottle until she was only taking two ounces when she would wake up.

Then I let them CIO.

It seriously only took one night waking one time, crying for less than 15 minutes and they've been STTN ever since. I know how sleep deprived you are and I hope it gets better soon!

 

I'm so sorry they aren't sleeping for you. :hug: I did CIO as well so I don't have any other experiences to share. Have you had a look at the sleep section of the First Year Handbook here on TS? There is info on sleep solutions other than CIO that might help you.

 

Sounds a lot like my boys. My have just started STTN at 13 months, but we still have some wake ups. I've done 3 rounds of CIO, and a few other things.

Amanda has some good ideas.

I personally think that anything to do with food is just a myth. It doesn't matter, formula, solids, breastmilk--the food is not connected to waking. On the upside, at their current age they do not have a biological need to eat around the clock, so you can go in a check them without feeding them. Although that's way easier said than done; I had a tough time stoppping the feeding because it almost always put them back to sleep.

 

Oh, sigh. Are we long lost sisters? I have b/g twins that are 11 mos old now. They go to sleep well at night, always around 8 pm. They sleep past midnight, but usually start waking up several times a night. There morning wake up time is 7 am most of the time. Today they pulled off a 6 am morning time.

We also have only 2 bedrooms. DD is in a pack and play in our room to separate her from our DD who is in the other room. When they start crying they set each other off.

Rubbing backs has done nothing for us, unless they are already pretty much asleep. When they wake up crying, we bottle feed them and I try to keep it as brief as possible until they are sleepy. Then we lay them back down in the crib. If all goes smoothly, we have a baby that is back to sleep with a miminal distruption. But it doesn't always happen this way. My DS will sometimes take off and start escalating. He will be awake longer and it's hard to get him back to sleep.
I really don't want to do CIO. It just doesn't feel right to me, but I'm wondering if I need to let go of my standards and give it a try. I'm so conflicted about this. But I can't get myself to pull the trigger and do it. I'd still rather not do it, but I don't want them to keep waking up all night as we approach the one year mark.

I obviously don't have any great answers here. My DH would be okay with CIO. Have you read the no cry sleep solutions book? I need to read it again and decide on a new plan. Currently I've kind of given up on sleep training. I'm too tired to think about it, but want it to stop. sigh....

off to bed...hoping for a decent night.
Keep me updated on what you decide. I may need some support, too!
Beth

 

I'm sorry they are not yet sttn. I don't have any advice but didn't want to read and run. I also had to do CIO with the girls and it worked brilliantly. I hope you get some other suggestions.

 

I couldn't do CIO either. Pick up a copy of "no cry sleep solution".

Another thing we did is to give water in the night bottles instead of formula. (of course we new they were getting enough calories during the day). Eventually they decide water isn't worth waking up for.

If you don't feel CIO is right for you, don't do it. It's not something my husband or I could commit to.

After following suggestions in that book, mine STTN 99% of the time... The exception being for teething or when they discoverd crawling

 

You must be so tired! It is really tough being sleep deprived. We also have b/g twins that have just turned 11 months. Until very recently, both would alternate nights during which they would wake. We also could not fully commit to CIO (although our pediatrician said she did and it worked for her family). All of the suggestions are great. What has worked for us is a bedtime that is not too late (7:30 p.m.); putting our lo's to bed as soon as we see the first signs of tiredness (staring off into space, rubbing his or her eyes, crankiness, loss of coordination, etc.); allowing them to cry once they are in bed but for no more than five minutes (we go in to check on them and console them, but we do not remove them from their crib); and making certain that our lo's do not nap to close to bed time. Remember to stick with whatever you decide to do for a while because it may take a few nights or more for a change to occur. GL!

 

Wow, Beth- like looking in a really tired mirror!
OK, here's the update, two days later. I went to Borders yesterday for the No Cry Sleep Solution book, but unfortunately all they had was Dr. Ferber's book, "Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems". I knew it was about CIO in part, but I decided something had to change and I bought it anyway. It has really great explanations of why babies repeatedly wake to be rocked, fed/nursed, etc, and after reading through that section I agreed to try CIO (DP has been wanting to do CIO for a while).

It was really hard, but was only 1 hour total (most of that time was non-crying). DD woke at 1am and we gave her her usual 4oz (she still seems to need it) then laid her back down before she could fall asleep. SHe cried & we waited 2 mins, comforted, waited 4 mins, back in, then a 7 min wait, then a 10 minute wait- and she fell asleep in this first 10-minute period.

In the meantime, DS woke at 1:30, probably d/t DD's crying. We just comforted him at the same intervals as her, and he went back to sleep much sooner, maybe 15 mins total. Both were alseep by 2am, and they didn't wake again until 6!

We'll see how tonight goes. Thanks for all the suggestions and help, you moms are the best!
Susan