Night Shifts?

I'm just curious as to how you and dh juggled your twins when they were newborns and up to the 6 month mark? We have 4 other children to care for, so sleep is very important, lol!

Did you sleep in shifts, meaning you slept til 1 or 2 AM and then had dh take the rest of the night, or did dh work til 1-2 AM first and then you took the second half?

I'm trying to decide what would work best. I'm due in August, but I'm sure they'll be here in July.

Thanks!

 

I am all about shifts! It worked for us-and honestly-we weren't sleep as sleep deprived as many new parents are. DH worked...So he would do the first shift-which was 8 PM-2a. Then I would wake up at 2am, pump, and then when the babies woke up-I would take care of them. In the beginning-they were sleeping in their carseats, so I would lug them downstairs, feed them, then rock them back to sleep. Torture right there! But-once they started sleeping longer(3 months maybe) we stopped doing the shifts. We would take turns getting up with them. It seems to be working pretty well.

You could always try the shifts, and if that doesn't work-there are other options. You each could be assigned a baby, etc...Good luck and congrats!

 

Nope. I always get up. I have an awesome DH though and he very frequently (more often than not) will get up and feed one of the girls. I feed the other and then pump. For the past two nights, he hasn't gotten up at all. He's been very tired and I believe he actually slept through all the crying and had no idea they were even awake (scary, isn't it?). Anyway, I've gotten pretty good at feeding them both at the same time. The first weeks were really tough. Now they are only getting up (usually) once a night.

 

QUOTE(megkc03 @ Apr 25 2008, 10:29 AM) [snapback]738790[/snapback]
I am all about shifts! It worked for us-and honestly-we weren't sleep as sleep deprived as many new parents are. DH worked...So he would do the first shift-which was 8 PM-2a. Then I would wake up at 2am, pump, and then when the babies woke up-I would take care of them. In the beginning-they were sleeping in their carseats, so I would lug them downstairs, feed them, then rock them back to sleep. Torture right there! But-once they started sleeping longer(3 months maybe) we stopped doing the shifts. We would take turns getting up with them. It seems to be working pretty well.

You could always try the shifts, and if that doesn't work-there are other options. You each could be assigned a baby, etc...Good luck and congrats!


Yes! This exactly!! :good: It worked really well for us. I know DH was working, but I was working HARD being home with the twins during the day. I can't even compare our desk jobs to the work that went into twinfants for the first 3-4 months. I was pumping (still am) too so DH has always participated in night feeds even after we stopped doing shifts. There are some nights that I sleep right through him getting up and will simply see bottles in the morning that indicate he was up with them at one time or another.

I will say that we didn't do shifts every night, but usually 3-4 nights per week. We also take turns sleeping in on the weekend now that we are both back to work and that works out well too.

Good luck and CONGRATS!!!

 

Yes, we did shifts. DH did 10pm until 2am and then I did 2 am until and throughout the day. DH was VERY helpful and the shift thing worked great for us. Our babies did not STTN until 8 or 9 months so it was extremely important that we shared the workload. Congratulations on your twin pregnancy!!!

 

no, my babies breastfeed, so I always get up. He changes a diaper every night, at the first feeding, unless he's sick or they skip the feeding.

However, that said, our boys have always been good nighttime sleepers, so there hasn't been a need for the "rocking-walking-praying-the-little-guy-finally-sleeps" bit either...

 

The first 6 weeks I can't really remember, but I went back to work when the girls were exactly 6 weeks old and we had to do shifts. Otherwise, we would never have survived. DH was up from 10-2 and then I got up from 2-until. It worked out great for us.

I think you have to see what fits and what doesn't. Try it out!

GL & congratualtions on your twins!!

 

My hubby works nights and gets home at 1 am. So, he takes the 1 or 2 am feeding. It works out well, though lately I have been frustrated with him! He was feeding them and immediately putting them in the co-sleeper. Then of course, they wake up and are fussy and I have to deal with it. Or like last night, I woke up and he was feeding them but was very tired so I had to take over and soothe them to sleep. And they were fussy most of the night <_<

So, it does work, but do lay some "rules" about how it is going to work.

 

DH is a night owl, I am a morning person. I usually went to bed around 7pm (which is fine with me, I was worn out). He took care of anything from 7pm until 1:30am, then anything after that was my shift. I had to get up to pump at 1:00am anyways, so this was a great plan for us.

He doesn't get up for work until 7:45pm, and he's good with 6 hours of sleep.

 

The first 6 weeks we did shifts, I would sleep 9-1, he would sleep 1-6 and then get up and go to work. Honestly, it didn't work for us, b/c the babies were really fussy from 10-12 most nights and DH couldn't do it alone, so no one got any sleep. At 6 weeks we changed it up and each took a baby. He took DS (our 'good' sleeper who would get up at midnight and 4 to eat but go right back down) and I took DD (who often would be up an hour or more after each feeding). Once DS started sttn (about 4 months) I got up with DD during the week and DH on the weekends. And now that they both pretty consistently sttn, I get up if there is a problem or issue.

I'm a firm believer that just b/c DH goes to work during the week doesn't give him a free pass to do nothing at home, including night feedings. Especially with multiples it's all hands on deck for survival.

 

We don't do shifts. I work, and my DW stays home during the day until she goes back to work. We both do the evening feedings and put them down at around 12. We are still feeding every 4 hours, so I get up at 4 and do that feeding, one kid at a time. I take the first kid to wake up and feed and change, then do the other. All but once so far in 3 months have I been able to do this. The one time both were awake and I had to feed them both at once with them sitting together in their boppy. I go back to sleep, and get up at 630 for work, and DW takes over as soon as they wake up. We started this current schedule at one month, and have done it for the past two months. They are starting to sleep a little more at night, so we will let that 4 am slide a bit now, but still do the 8 am feeding no matter how much it slid at 4 am.

It is just easier for us this way. DW can get sleep she will need for the day with them, while I am sitting behind a desk at work. We have been lucky that we put both kids in their crib after one month, and let them sleep and just listen for them on the monitor. I have slept through them waking up a couple times, but DW wakes up and nudges me.

It seems to be working well. It is funny because my mom spent two nights this week. She had no idea how much more work it was for twins. She could not understand our strict schedule until she spent 48 strait hours with us. She then admitted that if we fed them whenever they cried, and not on a schedule, we would be feeding all day and never have time to do anything. i am lucky my mom had the oppertunity to spend the two nights, because before that, the other two times she had seen them, she could not understand the schedule, and we were catching her with bottles mid schedule, when we had to stop her. Now she knows better and understands.

 

You can come up with several plans and agendas, but you can basically toss that out the window and just take it day by day. Babies, especially two at a time are so unpredictable. You don't know if you'll have colicy or just fussy or you may get quiet, content babies. You never know till they get here. Once you get an idea about how they are then it'll make it easier to make out a sleep plan.

good luck! My hats off to you, I couldn't imagine going through that with four other children to think about.

 

Yes, we did shifts. My mom came and stayed as well, and she'd do the midnight feeding, I'd do the 3am feeding and pump afterward, and DH would get up and do the 6am. Thankfully our babies have been calm from the beginning, and they always ate and went right back to sleep. After about 3 months they STTN, so it was no longer an issue....

It was still really hard, but I know I had it easier than many twin moms who have no help!

 

My dh stayed up until the 11:00 feeding and put them to bed (I went to bed at 8:00m) and then I would get up starting at the 1am feeding and through out the rest of the night...that way I got 5 hours of sleep in a row and so did he. It's only fair. Now this wont work great if you ebf, but if you bottle feed ebm then you could pump before you go to bed and then bf at the 1am feeding.
This helped me so much, before this was suggested to me I was so sleep deprived and about to run away!

 

We are still working this stuff out. The nights when my husband isn't working and can do a feeding make a big difference for me. He works three 14 hour days too, and the night before one of those I normally try to do everything myself because I feel so bad. I wish he were available more at night, but what can you do?

 

It is an absolute NECESSITY to take shifts. Seriously.. Thank G*D my mother had twins and told me "how to do shifts" or I wouldn't be alive today I'm pretty sure!

Okay.. I would go to bed at 7pm (via Tylenol PM) and set my alarm for 4 am. DH would do ALL of the feedings from 7pm until 4 am and sleep in between and then he would sleep from 4 am to 9 am when he went to work.

It was GREAT because he is very able to fall asleep quickly and for me-- NO CHANCE of that happening-- so... we set it up that way. I think there were two times in the entire 19 weeks that they got up at nite (in the beginning-- they are UP ALL NITE), that we BOTH had to be up.. But otherwise it was just one of us.

It's imperative that you are not BOTH piles of poop due to NEITHER of you getting sleep-- It just doesn't make sense.

PLUS--- here's the bonus!! It allows DH to learn how to do it ALL by himself!! Hooray! That way he doesn't end up one of those Dad's that can't change a diaper or make a bottle!! It's great!

Oh and we had separate bedrooms also during this time.. I had two HIGH POWER fans that I kept on the whole time I was off duty so I couldn't hear a thing. Sharing a bed is not conducive to this plan!!! If you're laying there awake anyway-- you might as well be up!! Isolate yourself during your OFF time and get rest!

Good luck and I have a hard time u nderstanding why anyone would choose NOT to do shifts.. It's just the BEST! There were only 2 times for both of us that we didn't EACH get 8 hours of sleep PER nite.. Never sleep deprived at all.

 

QUOTE(MarkL @ Apr 25 2008, 01:19 PM) [snapback]739065[/snapback]
It is just easier for us this way. DW can get sleep she will need for the day with them, while I am sitting behind a desk at work. We have been lucky that we put both kids in their crib after one month, and let them sleep and just listen for them on the monitor. I have slept through them waking up a couple times, but DW wakes up and nudges me.

It seems to be working well. It is funny because my mom spent two nights this week. She had no idea how much more work it was for twins. She could not understand our strict schedule until she spent 48 strait hours with us. She then admitted that if we fed them whenever they cried, and not on a schedule, we would be feeding all day and never have time to do anything. i am lucky my mom had the oppertunity to spend the two nights, because before that, the other two times she had seen them, she could not understand the schedule, and we were catching her with bottles mid schedule, when we had to stop her. Now she knows better and understands.


You are a very wise husband and father. Kudos to you!

 

We were lucky in that DH had the whole summer off (teacher) so we both got up... every time. I felt too overwhelmed taking care of both of them at the same time at first, and I also kinda had to get up every time anyway to pump for the next feed. I pumped every 3-4 hours around the clock for at least 8 weeks, I think. It's all very fuzzy now.

I miss pumping now, how weird is that? Sorry, off-topic!

If you can make the shift thing work, go for it! It sounds great!

 

Thanks everyone, I also had dh read the replies so he'll get an idea of what to do, too. This has been a very helpful topic for us! I've been especially nervous about the whole situation.

 

QUOTE(ivfbound078 @ Apr 25 2008, 03:58 PM) [snapback]739401[/snapback]
Good luck and I have a hard time u nderstanding why anyone would choose NOT to do shifts..



Well, shifts don't work if the mom is exclusively breast-feeding, of course -- I know I would have gladly traded sleep if my babies would have just latched in the beginning!

 

We did not do shifts, I did the nights myself. It was exhausting, but I made it through!

 

We never did shifts...we both would get up with the babies (when one woke up to feed the other baby would eat then too). Then we decided that we each would take a baby and only get up with that baby all night, and by the time we decided to do that (around 3 months), they started STTN! We probably could have came up with a better sleep arrangement, but neither one of us wanted to feed both babies by ourselves.

 

nope, I breastfeed so I get up. DH does put my older son to bed and wakes up with him in the morning and lets me and the twins sleep in a little. works for us. I also just change their dipares right there in bed when I feed them. So far we've only had one "accident" where I had to change the sheets in the middle of the night, but it beats not getting up as I do it all in a half asleep state. And my boys do get up every 2 hours to eat and somehow I am getting more sleep than the last months of pregnancy. well maybe not more but better sleep.

 

We didn't do shifts. For the first 8 weeks, per the Dr. instructions we had to feed the girls every 3 hours. We had the alarm clock set at night, because they didn't wake themselves. I was still pumping at the time, so DH would go to bed (okay so maybe more like fall asleep on the couch) around 9:30, I took the 11pm feeding by myself and then went to bed. At the 2am and 5am feed, Dh would get up, make bottles, and change the girls. Meanwhile I pumped, we feed the girls and then DH took the 8am feeding alone. It worked great for us, in fact I think I got more sleep then than I do now.

 

We did take shifts. DH works and I, of course, work at home as a SAHM! DH would stay up until midnight - I would go to bed at 9pm and then sleep on the couch at midnight - on so I could be close to the girls. If I had to do it over, I would not sleep on the couch - I didn't get much good sleep there! But I do like the idea of shifts.

 

For 2 months I did the night shift all by myself. I went to bed at 9pm and my DH would do the last feeding-one at a time-@ 10:00 and would bring them back to our room @ 11:30-12:00-they were the slowest eaters! Then the night began and the girls would be awake and I did it all, until I was so sleep deprived and cried a lot, so we shared and would do the late feeding together and then he would get the 1st baby up and then I got the 2nd-around that time we stopped waking them up to feed after the other was up. They usually woke up together or around the same time anyway.
You do have to see what works best for you-but sharing seems best! Good luck!