Night nurse vs. day doula/nanny advice

Hi everyone!
We're excited to be expecting twins in January and I'm in the middle of planning and trying to make life easier later. We can have some help for the first few months, and I'm torn between a night nurse and a day doula or nanny. I'm planning on nursing, so I feel like even if we had a night nurse, I'd be up pumping anyway to keep up supply.
Also, we have a wonderful 3 year old daughter, so if we have help during the day, I can sleep while she's in a morning preschool and spend some quality time with her when she gets home. On the other hand, every mom I've asked about this says that a night nurse was the best choice they could've made....

Do you guys have any thoughts or suggestions about which would be more helpful (day or night help). And also, do you have any recommendations about someone we could use in the Atlanta GA area?

Thanks in advance!!!
Sherrie

 

Night Nurse!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 Money well spent. I could handle the days solo..as long as I slept.

 

I didn't breast feed so I'm not sure how that would go, but if you have to get up anyway, I'd go with the nanny. ardon: BUT if you can pump and have her feed the babies, I'd go with the night nurse. :good: Your day will be so much better if you are getting sleep. Good luck with your decision!!

 

Given that you also have a 3-year-old, and will probably have to get up at night to pump anyway, I would probably go for the daytime help. If you just had the twins, I would say nights.

 

my dh got up with me for every feed, and changed the babies diapers and handed them to me, then usually fell back asleep and I would reswaddle the babies and put them back down. with that said. if you don't have your dh or someone to help at night... then I would recommend night help. this will streamline the process and get you back to sleeping sooner...

on the other hand... ours started sleeping more around 5 wks when we started swaddling again, and by 8wks they were sleeping 8hrs a night... and there wouldn't be a need for night help... hmmm what to do!

congrats! you will be in the thick of things soon enough and it will go great!

 

I have been trying to decide what I think would be more helpful all day :laughing: A night nurse would probably smooth things along with getting babies back down after feedings. It would be great if all you had to do is nurse and someone else took care of the rest... particularly if either baby is fussy at night. Daytime help is great so you can get up and have a shower and eat food and all that good stuff. I think really.. you can't lose! Taking your older child into consideration, maybe daytime help would be best so you can focus on her a bit... it's tough to do anything but take care of twins in the early days.

 

Ok, so babies do sleep most of the day at the beginning, so if you get a good night sleep you would have energy to play with your 3 year old. Btw she'll want you and noone else, especially at the beginning. So I would definitely go with the night nurse.

 

I'm not sure what will be better, but even if you are nursing help at night would still be awesome. The person can get the baby up, change their diaper, bring them to you just to nurse, and then be responsible for getting the baby back to sleep. The actual feeding part isn't as bad as tiring as trying to get a newborn back to bed sometimes. I think you can't go wrong with your decision - either way will be helpful Good luck!!

 

I agree with the night nurse because I had trouble sleeping during the day, and I seemed to mostly need help at night. Also, ditto what the others said - your babies will be sleeping quite a bit, so you'll have plenty of time to spend with the 3-yr-old.

 

I've put thought into this as well.

Will your DH willingly get up with your for a while? Like months? If he's the kind who will not, I would DEFINITELY do the night help. As a pp mentioned- the babies will sleep during the day. It's night time that I had a good month of S screaming all. night. long. You can get up to nurse (personally I find pumping more work than nursing)- just make sure whoever you get is ok with tandem feeding- ie that if one wakes up you'll be waking the other to feed.

I think the best way might be a night doula- they do light housework, make meals, help with nursing if you need it. Even if s/he came from like 2p to 10pm you could nap in the pm when your older child is out, have help getting dinner/baths for older child and go to bed very early before she left. Then if you're up at 2am it's a little better.

I'm so envious of your decision-either way is a win-win.

 

Agree with most of the previous posters that a night nurse would be most helpful even if you are nursing/pumping. What I did was instead of having a night nurse every night for a shorter period of time I had them 4 nights a week which allowed me to have them alot longer than I would have otherwise. Getting sleep on those 4 nights made the other nights tolerable and I was able to stretch having a night nurse much longer with our budget...We had her for almost 5 months! My twins were preemies so we had to continue night feedings for a while. Our night nurse was a life saver! The company we used here in Charlotte, NC was called Infant Sleep Solutions (google it and you will find the website) and I believe that they have a 2nd location in Atlanta...The owner's name is Jackie and we were very pleased with our night nurse who happened to be Jackie's sister Katris. They are a family owned business and they were able to provide numerous references that we could call and I felt very comfortable with them. If you speak to Jackie tell her that Kristin in Denver, NC recommended her service. Good luck!!

 

anyone mind me asking what the rates are for a night nurse? what does she do while she's there?

 

It's around $300/night in Los Angeles and they handle all nighttime baby care. If you nurse, they will bring the babies to you and then diaper and put down when you are done. Most also work on sleep training.

 

My friend is going through this decision as her second baby is just about to arrive and she decided on a daytime nanny so the nanny could also watch her toddler and she could get some solid sleep during the day. She is going to nurse so she'll be up at night anyways.

Could you shorten your time and get someone to move-in with you? That is the route I took, as I had to go back to work immediately and DH travels, so I wanted someone 24/7 for a little while.

I know of a great move-in baby nurse who works the southeast and has done many mulitples, and I saw this posting for a daytime nanny in Atlanta on the Moms On Call newsletter, but she starts with 6-week-olds:

LOCAL NANNY AVAILABLE

Miss Anita, an experienced nanny with a degree in Dietetics, would love to provide loving care for your six weeks to six years old little one(s). Please contact her via e-mail at [email protected] for more details.

I paid $14/hour for my baby nurse for the twins and $12/hour when she took care of my singleton.

PM me if you want my baby nurse's number.

Good luck!

 

I agree that night help was key for us. I was also pumping but I still thought the night help was worth it. Our night doula came at 10pm, I pumped right before bed then got up around 2am to pump then got up for the morning around 5:30 and she left at 6am. Just being able to string together those 3-4 hours of sleep was key. Also, our doula brought the pumping parts to me and cleaned everything when I was done so I was just awake for literally those 30 minutes or so when I was actually pumping. Huge difference from the 1 hour+ that it sometimes took the babies to eat.
We also had family who came during the day so I had some day help as well. The few nights I had to do myself in the early weeks were a killer. Our babies were up a LOT. I couldn't wait for our doula to come back!

 

300 dollars a night holy crap that is a lot of money and I want that job. Oh wait I am having twins that won't work but dang that is a lot of money 1500 bucks a week if you only have them five days a week sorry I just think that is insane. But being a nanny of twins all through out college that is great money for someone. Just saying

 

I know! It's A LOT of money! We couldn't afford it, but I would say that a fair number of parents in my multiples group either had or found the money to hire someone. Some even hire 24 hour care, mainly out of NYC - they fly the person out and house them while here. The going rate is $425/day. Lots of money but a better deal for all that help.

 

we had daytime help - i can sleep anytime, so that worked for us, but the twins are our only kids.

You get more bang for your buck with daytime help - and my husband was able to help me. It's so hard to know until the babies are here - and you see their temperaments, etc. I feel like (but it's all blur) nighttime was bad, but not a screaming fest. But again, it's a blur. Also, mine were preterm, so the first week or two wasn't terrible, Jake was in the Nicu and becca was sleepy.

 

I had a two-year-old and four-year-old when my twins were born last September and had a night nurse five nights a week for the first three months (a gift from my mother-in-law, bless her). I cannot imagine how I would've survived with all four of these needy people had I not been able to sleep at night - I would've been in the funny farm for sure.

I live in a small-ish town and we paid ours $10/hour - she came from 11 p.m. until 7 a.m. bathed and fed the babies, kept them on schedule, washed bottles and cleaned my kitchen (kitchen cleaning was not part of the job description, but I was so grateful that she did it!).

Good luck with your decision!