New Mom with a few questions

My twins boys are currently 7 weeks old but they were born five weeks early. Our pediatrician says that, in reality, the babies are really only two weeks old - if you go by their gestational age. I purchased the HSHHC book this weekend and the author states that babies reach their peak of fussiness at about six weeks and he also notes that preemies must take into account their gestational age (six weeks past your due date). So do this mean that it will be longer until I see an improvement in their sleep and fussiness due to their prematurity? Just curious if anyone else with preemies experienced this? Were you delayed in other developmental areas?

Also....is it possible to console both of your babies at the same time and how do you do it? I am developing a real anxiety about being with the babies by myself as I just don't know what to do when they are both crying. Today...I had both babies screaming their heads off and the only thing I knew to do was take them for a car ride. It worked but that is sure exhausting. Any tips or tricks that work for you?


Thanks!

 

I'm glad the car ride worked for you. Mine didn't like car rides! There are ways.. you can have one laying on your lap or beside you on the couch and the other up on your shoulder. A swing intended for infants or a bouncy might help.
Are the babies hungry or have they just been fed when they are fussing? It could be a sign of reflux. :hug99: So many people on this forum have been there done that (BTDT) so I'm sure more people will respond. You WILL get through it! It does get better. You are just really tired right now.

 

Hi-

Mine were born 8 weeks early and yes, they followed Weisbluth's theory that they need to reach their gestational age for sleep achievements so unfortunately for us it meant a lot more sleepless nights. I was mentally not prepared for that. Glad the car ride worked for you. I usually go through a mental checklist when the crying starts...wet diaper, hunger, gas, tired, etc...(maybe some reflux issues). I like the PP's idea of the swing. Mine loved the Fisher-Price swings that sways back and forth. They also like the Papysan chair that vibrated. Also the stroller in the house worked for us too. I would just drive it around the house and narrate. I also would put one in the Baby Bjorn or a sling too. Oh and dont panic. They wont always cry at the same time forever


Rachel

 

Yes...the pediatrician has diagnosed both of the boys with reflux and we started medicine about a week ago. We also made a formula change about a week ago as well. I just hate it when they cry so hard they start to almost gag themselves. It is really unnerving and I feel desperate to do anything to try to console them!

 

Mine were five weeks early to the day and got over the fussies right at 12 weeks. Buy two baby swings... they were our salvation. They slept all their naps and night times in them until 4 months and then we broke them of the swings and are now champion sleepers in their cribs. Try the vibration on a bouncy seat. I have heard (but dont recommend until you talk to a pedi) to fill a sock with rice and warm it in the microwave and lay baby on top... BUT PLEASE ASK A DR I JUST HEARD THIS FROM A FRIEND! Good luck and hang in there.

 

Honestly, I used to take up to 4 walks a day because the stroller was just about the only place the babies would sleep. I also relied on the swings a lot. I used to accept baby-holding help from just about anybody! My babies had a real need to be held for the first few months. Swaddling was helpful and so was using a Moby Wrap (www.mobywrap.com).

 

I would swaddle the baby as tight as I could and laying in the middle of my bed propped up on pillows, get both up against my chest on their tummies and just pat and shush and kiss their heads. they still cried sometimes but they really got to liking it and pretty soon would fall asleep when we did it. Later when they got older (about 1 1/2 months) I was just able to move on to swaddling and shushing them and giving a soothie and they would be out like a light. Swings were a lifesaver here also.

As PP have said this can be the hardest time, it is like they just cry and cry for no reason, and when all you want to do is rest yourself it can be so unnerving, but totally completely normal and eventually they grow out of it.

FIL says they cry b/c it is their only form of aerobic exercise

 

The duel crying is what has always gotten to me the most, it really is very stress inducing. I would put one in whatever usually made her the happiest (swing, bouncy, etc.) and work on calming the other. When they're a little bit older it will get so much easier, just hang in there and remember most everything is a phase that will pass. :hug99:

 

I go by adjusted age for EVERYTHING. Being born early does not make babies mature faster - a 34 week baby is just not going to behave like a full-term, 40 week baby. My twins have been hitting all the milestones right on target - for their corrected age.

So unfortunately, you still have a bit longer to go before hitting the peak (and then the decline!) of all the fussing. :hug99: But it will come. Just hang in there.

It is so, SO hard when both are fussing and crying at once. In those early weeks, sometimes I'd put one in the Baby Bjorn and hold the other one in my arms (doable when they're still so little) and just walk up and down the living room. Exhausting, but it seemed to calm them. Stroller rides and car rides can also work wonders. The "hot sock" that a pp mentioned (tube sock filled with dry rice & then nuked) soothed them sometimes. Also, are you swaddling? Do they take pacis? Swaddle by all means if you aren't already!

This too shall pass. I hope you have some better days soon! :hug99:

 

Gosh, my girls will be 8wks on Thursday and I swear it is getting worse by the day. I keep praying it will get better but it isn't. We are going to start to put rice in their bottles since they have AR. I am hoping it helps. Mine were born at 36w5d, so I am thinking it is going to be another couple of weeks before things start to get better.

Claire has colic and what soothes her is the car, and putting her in the carseat and swinging it. Yes, it feels like our arms will fall off. We even bought the Graco Snugglider, but they both hated it so we took it back. Carlie likes loud noises. So if she is kind of cranky and I want to shower, I put on my washer and dryer (in my bathroom) and run bath water...it soothes her.

April

 

Have you tried a fan for noise? We use the larger Vornado in the babies' room. I guess you are caught up on laundry, but a fan is cheaper to replace than wearing out your larger appliances.

 

I would cradle one in my arm and one on my shoulder.

Or one in the kangeroo thing and one in my arms, just so u have that closeness/comforting for them.

hope it gets easier soon