Nervous and Scared

I am currently 36 weeks and 5 days along and i am starting to get pretty panic ridden....These are my first babies and i am just so nervous about taking care of one newborn let alone two! Is this normal?! How will i know what a hungry cry sounds like, or what to do to calm the babies when they are fussy...And how do i handle it when both need something at the same time and i am only able to tend to one of them? I am so blessed to be having these babies but i just feel like i am going to have no idea what i am doing!!

 

:hug: I think what you are feeling is perfectly normal. The twins were my first babies too and I wondered as delivery day got closer what I was getting myself into. I learned the art of triage-tending to the cry that seemed the most urgent. What happened with our twins as newborns was that if one was crying, the other would just hang out figuring I would get to them next. It was stressful to hear them cry at the same time when they did do it but I eventually realized that there is one of me and I can only do the best I can. You will do great and you will figure out a way that works the best for you and your babies. Most of all trust your instinct! Hang in there!

 

I also think what you're feeling is totally normal- I felt the same way (as I'm sure a lot of other twin moms do.) It's daunting to think about how you're going to care for 2 newborns, but it's totally doable! I like what nancy said about triage-tending to the cry that seems the most urgent. I did the same thing. I also resigned myself to the fact that at some point someone was going to be crying and that I was doing the best that I could. You will know your babies better than anyone and you'll figure out what works. Good luck- try not to worry- you will do great!!

 

Tracy-i think it must be normal since I'm about 3 weeks behind u with my first two coming and I'm also freaking out! Not to mention how scared I am of labor! The not knowing what to expect pain wise scares me so much! Thanx to the ladies responding-u are helping me feel better about handling two as well!

 

I am so glad I am not alone feeling this way!! I have a c-section scheduled for monday morning and am starting to freak out about being a mom of twins(these are my first). I told my husband that everyone we see with newborns, you can always hand them back to their parents when they start crying. This time I am going to be the mom!! How am I going to know what to do!!! The past couple of days that is all I think about-how am I going to know when they want to be fed, diapers changed, two crying at once, and making sure I am the best mom I can be! Sometimes I wonder how I am going to deal with lack of sleep and keeping a handle on everything.

Reality is definitely starting to set in and I just pray I can handle everything.

 

:hug: Momma! Your feelings are perfectly normal, and I think we all shared those concerns to some degree. It truly is amazing how everything just comes together once they get here and get home. You are going to do a great job!! Just do your best, and take things one day at a time. Best of luck to you!

 

I am so glad you posted this! I am terrified, too! I can't imagine getting everything done- feeding them, dressing them right, even playing with them! I hate not knowing exactly what I'm doing, so I am stressing out over the unknown (including delivery). It's good to know that many women felt this way and that this forum is here to help/support all the new moms!
Best wishes!!

 

You are normal normal normal!! :hug:

My girls were my first babies too & I didn't have any experience with newborns - it can seem really scary!
It is amazing how things just come together after your babies arrive.
It can seem stressful with them both crying, but you just have to do your best, take it hour by hour & as long as the babies are safe then they are OK
I am sure you will do just great :good: :hug:

 

:grouphug: Totally normal! You will learn. I knew nothing and got through it. You will too. One day at a time!!

 

I remember when I had my twins how happy I was to have my mom with me because I felt clueless and it was nice to have reassurance...then I remember at their 1st birthday party when my mom said " do you still feel like you need my advice" and I told her honestly and sincerely " Absolutely NOT. I am their mother. I know what they need, I am the expert on my own kids and I dont need anyone telling me what to do or how to do it". She smiled because she knew, like all mothers you're going to figure it all out. Before you know it you're going to be an old pro and the last thing you're going to want is someont telling you how to do something that you are great at!

Just always follow your instincts no matter what the books tell you! Your mommy gut wont steer you wrong!

 

Although I haven't had my twins yet I do have 2 at home already and I can tell you that in no time you will be able to understand their cries and what they want, it really does come naturally as crazy as that sounds. It's amazing how fast you get to know them. As for handling 2 at once I am scared to death too! :hug: We can do it!

 

And not to change the subject but what about labor? I am TERRIFIED for first time/not knowing what kind of pain to expect! One was going to be scary enough but two! I'm freaking out! My left eye has started to twitch more and more as each week passes. I'm soo scared and anxious. Any pointers or thoughts from those who felt this way before and got thru it? How bad are the first contractions you feel at the start (before going to hospital?)

 

:grouphug: Oh I am right there with you and all the others who posted here! I have so many doubts about my ability to care for two newborns (I'm a first time mom too) and am really terrified about childbirth. It set in just last week, so this timing must be very normal. I think at this point we just have to gather as much support as we can and "dive in!" The only way to know what it will be like is to experience it, and we just have to try and have faith in ourselves. Look how well we have already done to carry them this far. We've also done well to find this community for support. As far as birth - it helps me to remember that it is only one day (or so) of my life. It is finite and relatively short compared to other things in life. As far as caring for the twins, I try to remember all the other things I've accomplished in my life and know that I am capable and caring and will love these little ones like nothing else...so surely I can do it. So can you!

 

I felt the exact same way as you are describing. What do I do when they both cry, what do I do if, if, if, if, if. You just do it. You are a twin mom which to a lot of people makes you a "super mom". I was so worked up before I gave birth. I thought this was going to be just awful...I am glad I thought like that, because when the time came for me to bring those little ones home...It was WAY better than I had anticipated! You will be just fine...I promise!

 

I am terrified to of caring for 2 at once and I have a 5 year old at home! Lol! My thing is that since its been so long inbetween babies that I will forget. So I have been spending time with my friend who has a 6 month old baby and I do everything except change the diaper! Lol! I just figure that after a few days the babies will hopefully be on a schedule and it will make it so much easier! :hug: to everyone who doubts. It doesn't take long to figure out what cry means what!!!! You can do it!!!