Need your suggestions/help with sleep training (long)

I know we should have started this months ago... our twins are almost 6 months old and aren't the greatest sleepers. It goes something like this:

DD... wakes around 6am, has 2-3 naps throughout the day for 1/2 hour - 1 hour each. Start bedtime at around 6-6:30 (this is when they're tired) and she's fed/rocked to sleep. Usually asleep in bed by 7pm. She'll often sleep about 5 hours before waking. The only way to get her back to sleep is to BF or give bottle. Sometimes she's awake for an hour or more during the night. After that first 5 hour stretch, she's up every 2 hours or so, sometimes every hour, til 6am when we get up with her.

DS... wakes around 7am, has 2 naps during the day for 1hr - 2 1/2 hours each. Like DD, start bedtime around 6-6:30, fed/rocked to sleep, in bed at 7pm. Usually sleeps at least 7 hours before waking. Sometimes can be rocked back to sleep (while standing next to the crib) but usually needs to BF or have bottle to go back to sleep. Sometimes is awake for an hour or more (but much less often than DD). After the initial long stretch, may wake once more a few hours later, but sometimes will only wake that once, then sleeps til morning.

We have rough nights sometimes, or a string of them, where they wake up a LOT, and lately they sometimes wake an hour or two after going down and we feed/rock back to sleep.

SO (if you're still reading) I know we need to do something but I really don't know where to begin!! We've started trying to put them down sleepy but awake, but they both babble and talk away and I think they're keeping each other up. If they cry we pick them up and soothe them then put them back down (we refuse to CIO). We did this tonight for about 40 mins and they were no closer to sleep, so we aborted the plan and rocked them to sleep. We will keep trying this every night, for a little longer every night. Is that the right way to do it?? From what I've read, if we can get them to fall asleep in the crib, they're more likely to put themselves back to sleep if they wake during the night.

Anyone else have sleepers like this and succesfully "train" them to be better sleepers?

Anyone start sleep training at 6 months?

I've read NoCry Sleep Solution but that's it.

I'm starting to feel really guilty... like it's my fault they're not getting the best sleep because I haven't helped them become better sleepers!!!

Any suggestions or advice?

TIA ladies.

 

I know we should have started this months ago... our twins are almost 6 months old and aren't the greatest sleepers. It goes something like this:

DD... wakes around 6am, has 2-3 naps throughout the day for 1/2 hour - 1 hour each. Start bedtime at around 6-6:30 (this is when they're tired) and she's fed/rocked to sleep. Usually asleep in bed by 7pm. She'll often sleep about 5 hours before waking. The only way to get her back to sleep is to BF or give bottle. Sometimes she's awake for an hour or more during the night. After that first 5 hour stretch, she's up every 2 hours or so, sometimes every hour, til 6am when we get up with her.

DS... wakes around 7am, has 2 naps during the day for 1hr - 2 1/2 hours each. Like DD, start bedtime around 6-6:30, fed/rocked to sleep, in bed at 7pm. Usually sleeps at least 7 hours before waking. Sometimes can be rocked back to sleep (while standing next to the crib) but usually needs to BF or have bottle to go back to sleep. Sometimes is awake for an hour or more (but much less often than DD). After the initial long stretch, may wake once more a few hours later, but sometimes will only wake that once, then sleeps til morning.

We have rough nights sometimes, or a string of them, where they wake up a LOT, and lately they sometimes wake an hour or two after going down and we feed/rock back to sleep.

SO (if you're still reading) I know we need to do something but I really don't know where to begin!! We've started trying to put them down sleepy but awake, but they both babble and talk away and I think they're keeping each other up. If they cry we pick them up and soothe them then put them back down (we refuse to CIO). We did this tonight for about 40 mins and they were no closer to sleep, so we aborted the plan and rocked them to sleep. We will keep trying this every night, for a little longer every night. Is that the right way to do it?? From what I've read, if we can get them to fall asleep in the crib, they're more likely to put themselves back to sleep if they wake during the night.

Anyone else have sleepers like this and succesfully "train" them to be better sleepers?

Anyone start sleep training at 6 months?

I've read NoCry Sleep Solution but that's it.

I'm starting to feel really guilty... like it's my fault they're not getting the best sleep because I haven't helped them become better sleepers!!!

Any suggestions or advice?

TIA ladies.

 

Hi There,

I'm no expert on sleeping, but I have read healthy sleep habits, healthy child (weissbluth) and I really like it. It describes how to move the bedtime earlier and earlier to gain more hours of sleep. and how good naps beget good sleep.

His theory is to either cuddle a kid down to sleep or to put them down drowsy but awake -- whichever works for you. I have one kid who goes down drowsy but awake and the other gets cuddled down. I think it depends on the personality of the kiddo and their readiness to go to bed on their own.

I don't like CIO either, but I have found that when my sons are overstimulated, the only way to get them down is to let them CIO -- it releases stress. Neither of our kids stays awake during the night, but we've only dream fed them since day one, so they have never had any interaction with us during sleep times -- don't know if that is why.

6 months of age is a common age to sleep train and I think Weissbluth sees that as a logical time to do so... so you're not late.

Anyway, check out that book and take from it what works for you.

Cheers,

Teri

 

It sounds like the problem is the rocking/feeding to sleep. If your babies know how to put themselves to sleep they will do that in the middle of the night, instead of needing to be picked up and rocked and fed back to sleep. If your kids don't cry when you put them in their cribs, even if they talk to each other, you should let them go at it and see what happens. My girls talk themsleves to sleep all the time.

I would suggest a modified CIO. We did this, but at a much younger age - around 3 months. We would put them down fed, changed and drowsy. If they cried we would let them go 5 minutes, then go in and soothe. Once they were quiet we would leave, and if they cried again we'd let them go 10 minutes. Even on the first night we tried this at this point they were sleeping and not crying anymore. Getting them to put themselves to sleep by themselves when they're used to being fed and rocked to sleep will probably involve some amount of crying, but you certainly don't have to shut the door and let them go for hours and hours.

Hope that helps.

 

Diane (~dfaut~) reccomends Healthy Sleep Habits, Healthy Child.

My advice is to let them babble to their hearts content, there really is no need to pick up a baby that's not crying. They usually drift off to sleep by themselves after a good chat. HTH!

 

Up until a week ago, i had a very similar situation and my boys are the same age- they go to bed at 7 and woke anywhere from 11pm-12am for a bottle and then each got up 2 more times throughout the night to eat full bottles. people kept tellling me they were waking out of habit and were eating enough during the day (they eat solids 2 times a day and four 5 to 8 oz bottles and they should not be eating so much at night. I refused to listen because i kept saying, "but they are hungry".

For naps, i would pat them and hum until they fell asleep. We started this around 4 1/2 months. we also used a noise machine and cd lullaby at the same time. Within a few weeks, i felt they knew the routine and one of my boys would even hum (quiet whine) along with me.

Last week i finally decided i could not take it anymore so i decided to have them CIO AFTER I gave them that 11 or 12am bottle. After 3 nights, they do not wake for those 2 bottles anymore so it was in fact out of habit they were waking. I know you said you would not do CIO so that is not my point on saying it. My point is maybe you can sooth them instead of feeding them. AFter the first night of not feeding them after their last late night bottle, they began to drink 8 oz consistently rather than sometimes 5 oz. THis has helped fill them up so they are not as full at night.

Good luck and keep us posted

I think the fact that we taught them how to sooth themselves during naps helped when we did CIO.

 

I'm a big fan of Good Night Sleep Tight by Kim West the Sleep Lady. She does a modified CIO. It really worked for us. She has advice for all age groups and adjustments for different situations. Including a chapter on twins.