Need nap advice for 4 month old

So, I should be good at this game since I survived the first year with twins, but my singleton (4 months next week) has got me baffled now. She was the easiest newborn in the world, which is the polar opposite of my colicky twins. Never cried. Nursed like a champ. Started sleeping 8+ hours at night by 6 weeks.
But.... (there's always a butt )

WE CAN'T GET HER TO NAP ANYMORE!!!

As a newborn, we started letting her nap in the swing because it was a place we could put her that was safe from dogs and 2 year olds. We would swaddle her, give her a paci, turn the swing on, and she would fall asleep on her own and sleep 1-4 hours. Now, she will still fall asleep in the swing but she wakes up after 30 minutes. We've tried the crib, pack n play, swaddled, sleep sack, unswaddled, rocking her to sleep...regardless we can't seem to get her to nap longer than 30 minutes any more. This leads to an overtired baby who screams bloody murder for my hubby while I am at work, which leads to a hubby who is about ready to crack! At night she still sleeps great. Goes down about 9:30 or 10 and doesn't wake for a feed until somewhere between 6-8 in the AM. After she wakes for that feed, she often goes back to sleep (twins don't wake until 8:30-9), and wakes for good 8-9:30 AM. She always wakes happy, and we try to put her down 2 hours after she wakes up, but after that the schedule just falls apart.

Any tips? Tricks? Ideas as to how to get her on a schedule? With the twins we used HSHHC and got them on a great nap schedule, but their problem was getting to sleep. Once we followed a strict schedule of nap 1.5-2 hours after waking they took nice long naps. This kiddo is so different and I am very confused.

 

Do you think it might be a sleep cycle issue? Some babies have problems switching from one sleep cycle to the next and wake up very easily in the transition from one sleep cycle to the next even though they are still tired. 30 minutes sounds a little short but maybe it is worth a try going to her a few minutes before she usually wakes up from her nap and soothing her into the next phase of sleep, e.g. shushing her, patting her, setting her swing off again.

Another thing to try, especially once she is overtired in the afternoon, is to see if she will sleep longer in a wrap/sling or in the stroller, so you can go out with the toddlers and she can get some rest. Maybe the movement and being close to you will lull her to sleep or at least to contented drowsiness?

 

My 3 month old does the same thing. Thankfully, he's happy when he's awake and doesn't act over-tired. I wish I had some advice but I can't find anything that helps either!

 

Where is everyone? Is the board really this slow or does no one have napping babies?

It could be a sleep cycle issue but it confuses me because she STTN. It's also hard because I'm running back and forth between her room and whatever the twins are doing.

I need to get a sling and try that. I don't have a stroller for her, just the double for the twins. I usually wear her in the Moby when we go out but lately she is nosy and won't sleep in it either. Also, she is much worse with the not-napping/screaming when I am at work and DH has avoided learning how to use the Moby so far (he stays home with them). This is driving me batty!

 

I don't have any advice bc my DD is the same way!! My twins were awesome nappers and now at almost 20 months she only takes one 45 min nap a day!!! Drives me bonkers!!!!!!! Wish I could help....how long has or been going on? Do you think it's just a phase? Learning something new? Teething? I would just keep at it! At 4 months she needs that nap!!! And so do mommy and daddy

 

Oy. My Anthony was a terrible napper for a time. It happened when he was older, but the ultra short naps drove me NUTS!!! I feel your pain!

The only thing I can think of-is her wake up time. I personally didn't worry about napping(with the twins at least) until six months old-but that is also when they started sttn. Could you wake her for good at say 6/7 am consistently? Everyday she wakes at 7, and everyday her first nap is 9am. I can remember, if you were off by ONE minute sometimes-that threw the whole napping schedule off!

I agree-keep at it. But if it doesn't work one day, don't go and switch it up the next day. Give it at least a few days to a week to see if she can work it out. I guess if it were me I would start a consistent wake up time and then consistent nap time.

Good luck! And when it all falls into place, let us know what worked!

 

Best thing I ever bought with my twins was the book Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child! It saved our sanity! They started napping better and sleeping awesome! I highly recommend it!!

 

I agree with Meaghan about the consistent wake and nap times. I would add consistent feeding times as well. I was a schedule nazi and it worked for all my kiddos, as well as other MOMs that asked what I did. The short version: wake and feed at the same time every morning. Then feed every three hours all day long (so if they are sleeping 12 hours through the night they'd get 5 bottles/nursings throughout the day). Shoot for the last 90 min to 2 hrs of every cycle to be naptime. Then wake, feed, play/have some awake time then back to bed. The best way to start this is when there will be two of you for several days. That way one can focus on naptime, the other on the older kids. I would literally stay in the bedroom with them for the duration of naptime when they woke at the first sleep cycle. I'd sooth in the crib first then pick up/rock for a bit if they needed it and lay them back down. It takes being uber consistent for up to a week but it works. GL!

 

I forgot to add: the boards are typically pretty slow over the weekends, so things should pick back up today.

 

Hmmm... my thoughts would be that maybe sleeping out where the dogs and twins are won't work anymore. At around 4-5 months is when most babies start getting a bit more aware of surroundings and startling more to external stimuli. Maybe your DD is a little more sensitive to the noise than your other kids were. I know you said you have tried crib but perhaps try to stick with it a little longer and put on some white noise in the room with the crib and close the door. with all three of mine, I stopped having them sleep out in the main part of the house in swings or pack n plays and in their cribs at around that time. This also seemed to be the time we started transitioning to more regular nap schedules. I've also always used white noise (fan) when they sleep.

I am not a schedule "nazi" in that I am flexible in the eating times, nap times, but I do know if they don't get 1-2 hours straight, it always seems to make them over tired, and off kilter the rest of the day.

 

My twins were terrible nappers at that age. Around 3 months was the worst, but IIRC, their naps didn't really start to lengthen and standardize until around 6 months.

Until then, we mostly napped them in the stroller on weekends. DH and I both lost lots of weight pushing that thing for 1-2 hours at a time! On weekdays they "napped" at daycare, but usually only for 20 minutes about 2-3 times a day. The evenings were ugly.

 

I'm with the PP re: sleep cycles and that she is becoming more aware of what's around her. Even though she's STTN, during the day, when she's in her light sleep, she is probably more aware of all the daily stuff going around her. I moved my twins into their bedroom, darkened for naps at around three months with the same routine, musical toy, shushing noises. This is consistent every nap.

My girls both had difficulty with their naps at just before 4 months - Sierra especially only slept for 45 minute stretches, which drove me barmy. I ended up separating them for naps, and every time she woke at 45 minutes, soothed back to sleep (usually rocking and/or patting), she now sleeps 1.5 hours. The best advice is to be consistent and do this every nap (if possible, I know it's harder with older kids around) and do it every day for at least week - that is what I did and I think that's what helped.

At my end though, I'm now finding that my good sleeper, Liara, now only sleeps for an hour at a time - sometimes I can get her back to sleep, but most often not, she's just awake, so I give her 3 naps of 1 hour instead of the two long ones that Sierra has.

Hoping it improves for you!

Oh and at worst, I did the graduated CIO, leaving it longer each time I went in - I found with this method, quite often than not, she fell back asleep on her own - of course this is a personal choice and for me, I'd rather have a well rested baby and put up with the short amount of crying, compared to an overtired inconsolable baby later in the day.

 

Thanks ladies. To clarify, the swing is in my bedroom so away from the rest of the craziness of the house. There is a fan in there for white noise and it is always pretty dark. The pack n play is set up with the bassinet attachment and is what she sleeps in at night. She has not yet slept in her crib as she still sleeps next to my bed. She has never lasted longer than 30 minutes for a nap in either the bassinet or the crib so we had not been using them, but I have been trying this week in order to try to get her to nap better. I have tried to soothe her back to sleep but so far it has not worked. If she wakes just fussing I let her go and she will usually put herself back to sleep. The problem with naps lately is that she is waking screaming and when that happens there is nothing putting her back to sleep. I am glad to see that this is a common problem though and hopefully just a phase.

As for waking her at 6-7 AM, that is never gonna happen! I work 2-3 shifts a week, mostly nights, and there is no way my husband would ever set an alarm to get her up when I am gone. We are much more likely to start our day around 8-9 AM. For instance, this AM she woke me at 8 to eat and fell asleep in my arms afterward. I sat there reading my email while she slept. The twins started playing in their room about 8:45, DH woke up about 9, and she didn't wake until I moved her off my lap around 9:30. This is why I've been trying to follow the 1.5-2 hours awake rule rather than set nap times!