Need help/advice/thoughts

So I am at a total loss here and hoping someone else has gone through this and has some ideas for us.

One of the twins is simply refusing to drink ANYTHING. We transitioned one of the girls to milk with no problems at all! But our youngest twin is just plain stubborn or oppositional or I don't know!!

We tried milk in a sippy, in a bottle, cold, warm, lukewarm, room temp. Tried different sippy cups, tried the bottle... tried juice, tried water, went BACK to formula when she quit taking ANYTHING to drink. She now goes nearly a full day without a single sip of anything. The only time she will have anything to drink is when she is sleepy, so late at night around 11pm. Otherwise, it's full on meltdown and she refuses to even put it in her mouth.

We had spoken to the peds and she assured us our daughter is OK as long as she has wet diapers. She has plenty of wet diapers, as I try to sneak in a jar of baby food or some food that is watered down enough. But she just plain won't drink anything!! I am offering dairy products so she gets that vitamin and nutrition she needs but I am just at a total loss here on how to get her to drink again. And also wondering if she is getting what she needs due to this.

She got VERY mad at me when I tried to introduce her to milk and that is when this whole thing began. It's like she thinks I am tricking her. I started to give her formula again just so she'd drink SOMETHING! I keep saying the same word "Regular bottle" over and over and try to at least get her to see it's what she is used to and that I am not tricking her. I want to gain her trust. Some days are good. Like three days ago she had every single bottle for that day but some days, like today and yesterday, she will not have anything to do with anything in a bottle or sippy.

How in the world do I get a stubborn and oppositional child to take something, ANYTHING, to drink?? It was hot the other day when we were out and I offered water to the girls... of course my eldest twin drank it all and I really wanted this stubborn girl of mine to have some water, too, but she refused. Sigh.

And no, she is not teething or in pain... she chews great, she swallows just fine, she sucks on a paci with no problems, she is happy and content all day, laughs and giggles and plays, no fever, no rash, no mouth sores... BUT give her something to drink and it's all over.

Anyone have any ideas?? Anyone go through this, too?? Any ideas?? Thoughts? Tips?? Anyone?

 

first, take a deep breath. second, i agree with your pedi - as long as she's having lots of wet diapers, she's fine. toddlers will take what they need, when they need it, as long as it's being offered at regular, frequent intervals through out the day. i would be willing to bet she's feeding off of your frustration & stress a little bit right now. if i were in your situation, i would offer whole milk in a sippy with every meal & snack (and possibly first thing in the morning & again just before bed) - simply set it within her reach & then don't say or do anything else. if she wants it or needs it, she'll take it. :hug: toddlers are so weird, but i'm finding more & more that the more i can go with the flow, the happier we all are. i hope she starts drinking for you again soon!

 

Totally agree with Rachel on this one! :good: At this point your DD is probably engaging in a battle of wills with you, and the more you push her to drink, the more she will push back. If she is healthy, step back now before this goes any further. Offer a sippy of milk or water or juice at meals, and don't even mention it. She will drink when she's thirsty!

I don't know if this is reassuring, but you can get a good amount of water from foods. Until she's ready to drink, can you give her a popsicle on hot days, or offer water-rich fruit like watermelon?

 

I'm glad you called your ped for reassurance. Since everything is okay health wise, I would try to step back and relax. When I start getting anxious about food or drink (my dd is very picky and often refuses food or drink)....I talk to myself "she's okay, she is healthy and fine." I have to override my anxiety that is telling me "something is wrong!! ahhhhhh-panic!!."

A few other thoughts. You might try a few different kind of sippies. There are some with soft spouts, straws, etc. I had to experiment with a few different ones. Mine are really interested in my water bottle (one with a spout). I found a sippy at BRU that has a similar spout. They seem pretty happy with it. I leave a few sippies of water around the play area, so they can drink whenever they feel like it.

I've heard some moms add a bit of carnation drink mix or ovaltine to the milk. I haven't tried this yet. My friend who was twins in the 3rd percentile does this every AM. Her ped recommended it.

My twins are older than yours, but I've been experimenting with dixie cups. I give them a small cup at mealtime and put a splash of milk in it. I make a big show of practicing with a "big kid" cup (I have to help them). My DS thinks it's hilarious and DD is very intent on figuring it out. Neither of them are able to drink a lot, but I'm trying to introduce a positive experience of milk from a different source.

GL. I'm glad your DD is healthy. She is strong willed, but will figure it out soon!

 

Thank you all for the reassurance that this battle of wills is not the end of the world!

I will definitely give it a try and just place the sippy next to her and take a step back and leave it be. It's frustrating but you're right! I need to relax about it. I've never experienced this before with any of my other kids so I felt like I was doing something wrong!

Thanks again!!!

 

:hug: My son is another one that does not drink a whole lot. I call him my camel. I agree that your DD is just engaging in a battle of wills with your right now. I say have a sippy out for her to take at her leisure, offer her water rich foods like Valerie suggested (watermelon, popsicles...I have used Edy's Fruit Bars when I went through this with my son). As for the milk, I tried flavoring it a little with strawberry syrup to get them to take to the milk. I also add Carnation Instant Breakfast to the milk, my two need the extra calories from it. Good luck and she will drink!!!

 

I have a covered straw cup that I am always drinking water of. I don't know if your twins are like mine, but they ALWAYS want what I have. Can she drink from a straw? Maybe try to see if she is interested in a drink if it is yours instead of hers. I figured out my boys could drink from a straw when offering them something from my cup - right around one year. Now, most of what they drink comes out of a straw (Munchkin Take-n-Toss: not leak free, but it is easy for them to drink out of). I know it sounds silly, but it's an idea! Good luck!

 

I've actually flavored the milk and she still refuses. My oldest twin loves her milk with strawberry nesquik!

I've also tried the straw idea, the straw sippy cup... I've been trying the suggestions here of just leaving the cup on her tray and leave her be. Still nothing. She shows no interest in putting it in her mouth and trying it on her own. She just plays with it. When her sister is done drinking, I take both sippys and get them cleaned up and that's it. I'm trying not to stress over it.

 

:hug: i know it's hard, but keep it up & just keep an eye on her diapers.

 

You can leave a sippy on the floor where she is playing. they walk over to it and find it like a new toy. Sometimes when there is only one they fight over it to drink it and the competition gets more into them. Other options is to have a glass of water too when you are near them and they might want to sip it. Offer it to the twin who IS drinking and not offer it to the other twin. Again competition to your advantage. The "Carnation" will add calories but not the liquid you are looking for.

What about a large bucket of water outside and play with cups and pretend tea party. There is always the water in the bathtub too. hehe As soon as my daughter gets a hold of a cup inthe bathtub she is drinking the water....

Heather