Need Discipline Advice

I desperately need some suggestions for discipline because nothing seems to be working. My girls are 4 and recently (the past couple weeks) they have been very aggressive with me. when they don't get what they want they will hit, kick and scratch me. The other night one scratched my face so bad that it was covered in blood. I have tried time outs, taking favorite toys away, restraining them in my lap during a fit of rage. I just don't know what else to do to get them to realized this behavior is not acceptable. Also, one of them tried biting another kid at preschool the other day. There has not been any major change in the last couple weeks so I don't know why this drastic change in behavior or how to get them to stop. Today one of them thought it was really funny when I told her no and when she didn't listen and I picked her up to take her in her room she laughed and hit me in the face. My DH and I are at the end of our rope and I would really appreciate any advice on how to get them back on track.

 

QUOTE(HappyMomOfTwins @ Jul 16 2007, 06:43 AM) [snapback]332263[/snapback]
I desperately need some suggestions for discipline because nothing seems to be working. My girls are 4 and recently (the past couple weeks) they have been very aggressive with me. when they don't get what they want they will hit, kick and scratch me. The other night one scratched my face so bad that it was covered in blood. I have tried time outs, taking favorite toys away, restraining them in my lap during a fit of rage. I just don't know what else to do to get them to realized this behavior is not acceptable. Also, one of them tried biting another kid at preschool the other day. There has not been any major change in the last couple weeks so I don't know why this drastic change in behavior or how to get them to stop. Today one of them thought it was really funny when I told her no and when she didn't listen and I picked her up to take her in her room she laughed and hit me in the face. My DH and I are at the end of our rope and I would really appreciate any advice on how to get them back on track.


Have you tried 123 Magic! it works!

 

My first question is always, how is their speech? I found with my son, he had an expressive speech delay which caused him to be violent--simply because he had no other means of expression.

At 4, they are old enough to deal with consequenses. The trick is to find what is important to them, and be consistant. For example, my son loves his bunny--if he were horrible, I would take it away. One warning, and the next time gone--I have never had to go beyond the warning. The biggest thing is to follow through--don't make empty threats. Good luck!

 

I could use some help too - my son is 3 1/2 and will get so angry and throw things when he gets mad. He know will get completly naked and pee on the floor. This isn't an everyday occurance. He is fine at preschool. I try taking things away and timeouts do not work.

 

First - what is 123 magic? never heard of it.

As for their speech, one has great speech, the other one it is ok. I have been taking thier favorite things away and they have earn it back, but since they haven't been good even for a full day yet to earn it back I don't know that they are getting that they can earn it back....UGH

 

You may want to start with shorter intervals than a full day. Work on morning and then afternoon. You may want to go hour by hour when you start, just to get them the idea. You need to have more positive than negative, so going a whole day to get something back is an eternity for a 4 year old, but they will handle breakfast to lunchtime much easier.

 

My Katrina is exactly like that. She will hit, scream, and do anything she can to get away or to not listen. The only thing that helps with her behavior is sleep. I don't know if yours still nap but I have noticed if she doesn't nap (both of mine still take about a 2-3hr nap daily) then the next day she is a nightmare, or if she goes to bed really late (way past their bedtime). Bascially the only thing that somewhat works (taking toys away and everything you have tried doesn't always work for us) is if I just put her in her room and leave her in there for a while. I ignore the screaming, hitting/kicking of the door, and anything else she might do in there and just let her calm down. When she is calm and her timeout is over (which doesn't start until she is calm) then I go in and talk to her and for her to say she is sorry. I hope you find something that works for you.