need advice

ok my babies r 9 months old. everytime i put them down to play my DS will always go up to my DD and grab at her face. this makes her cry all the time. they both use paci's and even if he has one in his mouth already and he see's her with her's he will try to grab it out of her mouth. he takes EVERYTHING from her. i try to take it back if she's playing with it and i give him another toy. i have also tried just doing things to get his mind off of what she has and he is just fixated on what she has. most of the time she just lets him have it and gets something else and then he wants that so she gets something else and the game goes on. what i dont like is when he grabs at her face though.
any suggestions on how to get him to stop this? i tried saying NO but yeah as we all know that doesn't work. I tried giving a light slap on his hand and saying no in a more stern voice and he looks at me like what was that for then goes to do it again. i tried putting him in the pack n play for time out and when he comes out he does it again.....AGGGGGHHHHHHHHH HELP ME SOMEBODY!!!!! :umm:

 

QUOTE(2xthelove @ Feb 27 2008, 02:49 AM) [snapback]642139[/snapback]
ok my babies r 9 months old. everytime i put them down to play my DS will always go up to my DD and grab at her face. this makes her cry all the time. they both use paci's and even if he has one in his mouth already and he see's her with her's he will try to grab it out of her mouth. he takes EVERYTHING from her. i try to take it back if she's playing with it and i give him another toy. i have also tried just doing things to get his mind off of what she has and he is just fixated on what she has. most of the time she just lets him have it and gets something else and then he wants that so she gets something else and the game goes on. what i dont like is when he grabs at her face though.
any suggestions on how to get him to stop this? i tried saying NO but yeah as we all know that doesn't work. I tried giving a light slap on his hand and saying no in a more stern voice and he looks at me like what was that for then goes to do it again. i tried putting him in the pack n play for time out and when he comes out he does it again.....AGGGGGHHHHHHHHH HELP ME SOMEBODY!!!!! :umm:



We're in the same phase, and it's a true PITA. I don't believe any kind of hand-smacking or time-outs really get through to them yet - maybe others disagree with me - but I try to consistently take his hand away and say, "No, we don't hit other people" or "No, that hurts Jack and we don't hurt each other" and then I move Tom to the other side of the room and give him something else to play with.

Does your son actually hurt your daughter? I kind of think if it doesn't bother her than I'd let it slide (since you can't really stop it), assuming that some day she'll figure out a way to communicate that she doesn't like it (like, say, biting him). If he's hurting her, does he still do it when she doesn't have her pacifier? Sometimes I just take all the binkies away so that there's nothing to grab.

 

QUOTE(2xthelove @ Feb 27 2008, 02:49 AM) [snapback]642139[/snapback]
ok my babies r 9 months old. everytime i put them down to play my DS will always go up to my DD and grab at her face. this makes her cry all the time. they both use paci's and even if he has one in his mouth already and he see's her with her's he will try to grab it out of her mouth. he takes EVERYTHING from her. i try to take it back if she's playing with it and i give him another toy. i have also tried just doing things to get his mind off of what she has and he is just fixated on what she has. most of the time she just lets him have it and gets something else and then he wants that so she gets something else and the game goes on. what i dont like is when he grabs at her face though.
any suggestions on how to get him to stop this? i tried saying NO but yeah as we all know that doesn't work. I tried giving a light slap on his hand and saying no in a more stern voice and he looks at me like what was that for then goes to do it again. i tried putting him in the pack n play for time out and when he comes out he does it again.....AGGGGGHHHHHHHHH HELP ME SOMEBODY!!!!! :umm:



Could have written this post! Except sometimes she grabs his face too. They do it out of excitement a lot. Like, "I-am-so-excited-to-see-you-I-just-want-to-poke-you-in-the-eye"! As for the toy-grabbing thing--it drives me crazy. I have no idea when to intervene. He ALWAYS grabs whatever she has, and she just howls, and then he laughs. She's getting better about either moving on, or taking it back. Most of the time I try not to get in the middle because I figure I have years and years of this to look forward to, and they better figure it out on their own sooner rather than later. When it gets particularly bad, I just pick one up and put them across the room with other toys. At this age, discipline is a bit over their heads. Redirection is about all we can do!

Reyna

 

Best advice I can give you is to keep at it. Consistency will eventually pay off. Its pretty hard to reason with a 9 month old, so you have to just keep moving him away from her for now and tell him no.

I know it's hard and its a huge PITA. :hug99: Remember, this too shall pass.

 

[SIZE=10pt]Mine are doing the same thing. James always takes everything away from Jack but Jack just goes onto the next thing so it doesn't really seem to bother him. When he does get mad I still don't intervene and lately he has started grabbing his toy back. I really don't know what the "right" thing to do is but they seem to be figuring it out on their own. They also pull eachother's hair a lot which I usually will just grab their hand, say no we don't do that, and give him a toy to play with. I hope eventually they stop pulling hair .[/SIZE]

 

QUOTE(Zabeta @ Feb 26 2008, 10:42 PM) [snapback]642259[/snapback]
We're in the same phase, and it's a true PITA. I don't believe any kind of hand-smacking or time-outs really get through to them yet - maybe others disagree with me - but I try to consistently take his hand away and say, "No, we don't hit other people" or "No, that hurts Jack and we don't hurt each other" and then I move Tom to the other side of the room and give him something else to play with.

Does your son actually hurt your daughter? I kind of think if it doesn't bother her than I'd let it slide (since you can't really stop it), assuming that some day she'll figure out a way to communicate that she doesn't like it (like, say, biting him). If he's hurting her, does he still do it when she doesn't have her pacifier? Sometimes I just take all the binkies away so that there's nothing to grab.

yes he does grab her binky or without and he makes her cry all the time when he does it. he gets her eyes all the time

 

i love to hear that my kids r doing the same as everyone else's. i will try to do the moving thing. i know the excitement on them seeing each other but ya know they r together all day long. guess i will never figure what they think lol. i like hearing about what people do and how they do it i have gotten great advice from all you mommies out there. thanks