Naps

My girls are only 2 months old. I put them down in their cribs when I see that they are tired. Madison is usually pretty good about not fussing for to long and she goes right to sleep. Claire on the other hand will cry and cry sometimes.

My question is - should I not make them stay down for a little bit this early or just keep going in and comforting them for a few minutes if they cry and not pick them up until after they get a decent nap. If so how long should they stay down for a nap?

I want them to know that their cribs are for naps and bedtime at night - to rest, relax and sleep. Is 2 months to early to start this? However, they also need naps and I can't possible hold them the entire time to get them to sleep. Isn't that a bad habit to start?

My friend's mom is a retired pediatric nurse and she said to start a schedule now. I just want to know your thoughts on this. I'm going to be going back to work in a few weeks and hoping to make it a little helpful to their caregiver if I can.

 

Just wanted to let you know that I put them down together at 3:00 and Madison fussed for 20 min and went to sleep. Claire fussed for 45 min but finally quit and went to sleep. Madison has now been sleeping for 1 hour and 20 min and Claire has been sleeping for close to an hour.

Your thoughts??

 

They are WAY too young to do CIO. CIO is only appropriate when babies can self-soothe, which usually doesn't happen until at least 4 months. A few minutes of fussing is OK, but I wouldn't let it go longer than that.

QUOTE
My friend's mom is a retired pediatric nurse and she said to start a schedule now.


I think that advice is inappropriate at your babies' age. The part of the brain that creates organized, predictable daytime sleep doesn't really mature until about 4 mo - that's the earliest you can realistically expect to see the beginning of predictable naps. And even then, a strict by-the-clock schedule is not really a good thing for many babies. It's always better to just play it by ear and respond to their cues.

 

My girls are 2.5 months adjusted and we are still on no predictable nap schedule. Their little 2.5 month brains just aren't ready for that yet. Sometimes they nap at the same time, many times they don't. Karina has only had two 20 minute naps today. :crazy:

 

i didn't start putting them down for "naps" in their cribs until around 5 months. before that, they usually slept in a swing or the bassinet of the pack and play. they were semi-scheduled when they would sleep though...it was a routine of being awake, eating and sleeping. once they reached 5 months, i would watch for signs of tiredness...rubbing eyes, glazed look, yawning, etc. i think they did 3 naps then? hard to remember now

 

Our naps were a mess until about 6 months, which was when they both were sleeping through as well.

 

Personally, I wouldn't even worry about it at this stage. IMO, they need to be a little older to just put down and let fuss by themselves, they need you right now.

We did CIO at 4.5 months for STTN and then started implementing a nap schedule around 5ish months, which didn't stick until about 6ish months.

At the age your girls are, mine where sleeping wherever, whenever, as long as we god them to take a nap.

Do what is right for you and your sweeties! :hug99:

 

oh my goodness. I couldn't even imagine putting them on a schedule at 2 months! I have been incredibly patient with my little ones, who just started sleeping through the night. I did not do any CIO because I knew my babies would do it when they were READY. The only schedule they have is a bedtime schedule. Solids at 7pm, baths at 7:30pm, bottles at 8Pm, bed at 9...

 

Thanks for your advice - I won't do that. I did not just let them cry - I did go in when I heard them. I will put them in their cribs when they are tired but I'll get them if they cry.

I asked my pediatrician about scheduled naps in the afternoon and she said it was fine to go ahead and do this but to do like I did - go in when I hear them.

Now I'm confused because most people I've talked to about this either did it early or think it's good.

 

A set schedule would be hard to implement right now as they are pretty young. Having said that I don't think there is anything wrong with letting them fuss/cry for a little bit. That often happens with twins anyway, you are trying to help one get to sleep while the other is fussing/crying, and sometimes that twin falls asleep while they wait. Up until about a week ago I didn't really let mine fuss longer then about 2-3minutes, but last week I let my dh fuss/cry for 11minutes, and then she feel asleep and slept nearly the whole night. So, I think there is some room for letting them fuss but IMHO I wouldn't let them fuss longer then about 10minutes before trying to help them get to sleep though.

Good luck whatever you decide to do and hang in there.

 

I should add that I only put them in their cribs because they were both dozing off - tired. It's not like I looked at the clock and it said 2:00 so time to put them down. I watched for their cues. Also, when they did get up, they were so much happier than they've been all day because they slept. How is this any different than at night? I go in at night every time I hear them, console them and go back to bed.

I don't mean to sound defensive - I'm just learning but son't want to do anything to harm them either so that's why I wanted to ask you guys.

 

Thanks Isis - I went in every 5 minutes to console them. I should add that it was fussing - not full fledge crying at the top of their lungs. I think they were tired.

 

At that age mine were falling asleep on the bottle or in the swing so they were always soothed to sleep by something or someone other than themselves. It was not until about 4 months that I started putting them in their cribs for naps sleepy and either they fell asleep after a bit of fussing or I ended up rocking them to sleep.

FWIW the only schedule at that age that we tried was to keep them on the every 3 hour feeding schedule that the NICU had them on. That was very hit or miss as well. They just needed to mature. Hang in there.

 

I understand where you are coming from and what you are trying to accomplish. I started putting my girls in their cribs around 2 months because my older ds was waking them downstairs. Mine rarely slept in bouncy seats/swings, etc. (not that their is anything wrong with them doing so). They did sleep on the nursing pillow on me alot of the time for the first 8-9 weeks.

This is what I did and still do for naps. My girls can only make it about 1hr,15 min - 1hr,30 min before they need to sleep again. I nurse them and put them in their crib awake but very tired. They stir and usually go to sleep. Sometimes they fuss for a few minutes, but I always pat their bottoms (they sleep on their stomachs) through the fussing and little bit of crying until they stop fussing, but before they fall asleep. Sometimes they will start to fuss again when I stop patting their bottoms, I start the process over again. It takes anywhere from 30 sec to 5 min. If they start to really cry, I pick them up and soothe them and put back down and start over (rarely do I have to do this now). They respond well to this. They almost always wake around 30 min to 45 min and I go to them. Most times I can tell they are still tired, so I pat bottoms for a few seconds/minutes and they go back to sleep taking a nap around 1 hr 30 min - 2 hr 30 min. If they start to cry or seem really awake, I get them out of the crib and call it a nap, but I do not assume right away that they are really done with the nap. I think most babies wake up from naps before they are really ready to get up.

I do agree with the others that a nap pattern may not be developing yet, but you can still work on routines and watching sleepy cues (which I think you are doing), maybe at their age though, they need a bit more help soothing. I definitely believe 2 months is not too early to establish good sleep routines, habits. Having said that, my ds was such a challenge and he didn't sleep anywhere other than in arms, at the breast, and in our bed for a good 4/5 months and he didn't STTN until he was 17 months old. So I think it has a great deal to do with the temperament of the child/children. If your babies respond well to sleeping in their cribs with some help from you, then do it. If they sleep better in swings or in arms, then do that. What is important is that they get some sleep.

Regardless of what the "experts" say, there is no age where a baby needs to sleep a certain way, in a certain place. So meet your babies needs, work on some healthy sleep routines, and be flexible because babies change it up on all the time and no baby is the same.

 

Thanks Christy. My girls sleep better in their cribs. If I let them stay in their swing or whatever they don't get a good sleep and I'd never put them in my bed with us - not safe. I could never let them cry without responding. Most of the time when they are fussing, they see me and they stop, looking at me in their cribs but their eyes are half closed like they are wanting to go to sleep, just fighting it. I just don't pick them up. I lean over, rub their tummy and soothe them by saying Shhhhhh till they stop fussing and then leave and repeat as necessary. I have the lights off, the blinds closed and the ocean waves playing on this CD player that play nature sounds during their naps just as I do at night. When I said that Claire cried for 45 minutes, I meant fussed but I kept calming her each time. Since I'm responding this can't be harmful, can it?

 

Just wanted to add that in Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child that in the twin section (the back of the book) on page 407 he states that "with twins, triplets, or more, the major principle is to start early". Early sleep training means starting around the time the babies are born, or around the time of their due date for children born early....".

I think the poster has a very valid question and forgive me if I sound defensive as well but saying things that "oh my goodness I could never imagine doing...." is a bit harsh. I think she is just wondering as I did and still do, what is the appropriate level of sleep training. I know everyone on here says do not do any CIO until after 4 months, but there are many, many things one can do before 4 months. The major thing would be watching for sleepy signs. My girls do not STTN but they are getting pretty good at falling asleep in the day awake. In fact my Ped. says at every appointment, "you will save yourself a lot of trouble later on if you put the babies down awake". They also sleep in their own cribs, or swing if they need be.

My girls will be 3 months adjusted next week and sometimes I let them cry (gasp!). I know their cries, especially if they just ate, burped, diapered, clean, just right temp wise, they need to just fret a little in their crib. I always go in and check on them within a couple of minutes and eventually they fall asleep. If I would have bothered them too much I could have robbed them from a 2 hour nap!

I hope you figure things out Bridgett and more importantly I hope you feel comfortable to ask questions that we ALL are asking especially as first time moms.

 

I think if they are fussing and not full on crying...there is no issue with leaving them in their cribs. As long as you are checking and soothing I don't see any problem here. You will find what works for your family...it may take some time but we all figure it out eventually. Good luck!

 

QUOTE(Bridgett @ May 16 2008, 12:06 AM) [snapback]776150[/snapback]
Thanks Christy. My girls sleep better in their cribs. If I let them stay in their swing or whatever they don't get a good sleep and I'd never put them in my bed with us - not safe. I could never let them cry without responding. Most of the time when they are fussing, they see me and they stop, looking at me in their cribs but their eyes are half closed like they are wanting to go to sleep, just fighting it. I just don't pick them up. I lean over, rub their tummy and soothe them by saying Shhhhhh till they stop fussing and then leave and repeat as necessary. I have the lights off, the blinds closed and the ocean waves playing on this CD player that play nature sounds during their naps just as I do at night. When I said that Claire cried for 45 minutes, I meant fussed but I kept calming her each time. Since I'm responding this can't be harmful, can it?


As long as you are responding to them and they are not crying, I think it is fine.

Also, I just wanted to add that bringing a baby in your bed can be safe if done correctly. I am not at all trying to tell you to do that. I just think sometimes as mothers we get misinformation or conflicting info, but co-sleeping is very safe if you use certain guidelines and in some cases the most safe place for a baby to sleep.

 

Thanks Pam & Kelly. I'm a very new mom and just trying to figure it all out. Another friend said her doctor said to start as early as possible - put them down in their cribs and go in and pat them, soothing them and they will eventually figure it out but may take awhile. Now that's 3 different professionals in pediatrics in my city that say the same thing about it being ok this early.. I guess you just got to do what works for you. After much thought I'm going to still put them down in their cribs when I see that they are tired but console them without picking them up. I've done this for a week now and the 45 min yesterday was the longest Claire has fussed - usually it's 10-15 min.

I do really value everone's opinion here.

 

Bridgett,
Hi!!! It's good to see you I am right there with you, I am always wondering to myself, am I doing this right? Am I fostering bad habits? How much whining/crying is too much? How much sleep do they really need? I am certainly no expert I think it's all about experimenting and figuring out what helps your babies the most. At two months I decided--no more swings and bouncies for naps--that lasted two days b/c they wouldn't sleep in their cribs except at night. I watch for tired signs but I also watch the clock, so they're up no more than 1-2 hours, but usually only 1 -1.5 in the morning/early afternoon. Then I swaddle them, turn on the white noise (usually), and put them in their preferred nap location, which took some experimenting. If they fuss for more than a few minutes, I usually pick them up an try to soothe them, and put them back down when they're calm. I have to say, the naps have become more predictable for us in the last few weeks. Not certain times, but a predictable cycle. They always nap at least an hour, usually longer. Prior to that it was totally random. Ours do the wake/nap cycle up until about 4:30 and then they're up until bedtime usually, around 7:30. When I think back 6 weeks, we have come SO far. We used to have to rock, bounce, soothe for hours on end at night, especially in the middle of the night after their feedings. It seemed like everyone else's baby fell asleep nursing except mine. Now at night they go down fairly easily, some rocking (and I shake the crib), and they go right down after nighttime feedings although they talk for a while.
Sorry for the novel, but I guess I just wanted to say, I've been there and I had wished there was a magical answer or solution, but there wasn't. We are still getting to know our babies like you are, and you do the best you can to get them their needed sleep and help get some sanity for yourself.
Hang in there!!

 

QUOTE(Bridgett @ May 15 2008, 11:06 PM) [snapback]776150[/snapback]
Thanks Christy. My girls sleep better in their cribs. If I let them stay in their swing or whatever they don't get a good sleep and I'd never put them in my bed with us - not safe. I could never let them cry without responding. Most of the time when they are fussing, they see me and they stop, looking at me in their cribs but their eyes are half closed like they are wanting to go to sleep, just fighting it. I just don't pick them up. I lean over, rub their tummy and soothe them by saying Shhhhhh till they stop fussing and then leave and repeat as necessary. I have the lights off, the blinds closed and the ocean waves playing on this CD player that play nature sounds during their naps just as I do at night. When I said that Claire cried for 45 minutes, I meant fussed but I kept calming her each time. Since I'm responding this can't be harmful, can it?



I don't think this is bad at all. I did this with my girls when they were little and it worked for us. Whatever works for you is what matters. You raise them the way you see fit and don't let anybody make you feel like less of a mother because your babies fussed a little in their cribs. Sometimes babies just need to be put down and not be held for a while. I know mine did. I think they got tired of being held all the time. I am sure you are doing a perfect job. Keep up the good work and keep doing what you think works for your babies.

 

QUOTE(clkafka @ May 16 2008, 08:56 AM) [snapback]776548[/snapback]
As long as you are responding to them and they are not crying, I think it is fine.

Also, I just wanted to add that bringing a baby in your bed can be safe if done correctly. I am not at all trying to tell you to do that. I just think sometimes as mothers we get misinformation or conflicting info, but co-sleeping is very safe if you use certain guidelines and in some cases the most safe place for a baby to sleep.



I agree with this also. My first dd slept with me until she went to kindergarten and now my twins sleep with me and I wouldn't want it any other way right now.

 

Jen - so good to hear from you!!! Can you believe still believe that after all we went thru our babies are here!?! Still hard to believe sometimes!

Missy & Christy - I'm sorry I hope you don't think I was criticizing you for having your babies in bed with you. When I was saying "not safe" I was thinking about my 6'6", 245 lb. husband rolling over on them.

I agree that we all have to do what we think is best for our babies. Thanks ladies!