Nap Mayhem!

OK, So I want to know whose babies really nap from 9-11 and 1-3 (or something close to that). I think there are FAR too many of us out here (at least in the 4-6 month range) aspiring to what may be unattainable and are left feeling like we are doing something wrong!! I'll fess up that for a few weeks, mine were pretty close with a catnap to boot (I could alwasy count on the swing if one woke up too early to lull tham back), so I may be guilty of posting a schedule that made it appear my lil angels were sleeping ever so nicely at set times for the same amount of time. Let me just say, I'm sorry, I Lied. Yeah, right, well you know what karma is....

There must be 100 nap posts in the past few months that is some variation on the same topic - how do I get my babies to nap longer, better, together, blah blah blah.....I'm not saying these posts aren't asking important questions, but sometimes I really think it's just a crapshoot. There is only so much we can do as parents (put them down when sleepy and give them a nice environment for sleep), and in many cases the fact that one is a good napper and one isn't proves that there isn't some magical solution that will work for all babies.

So, what I really want to know is when you answer posts about your babies schedule,do you post your "ideal" schedule (but maybe it only happens a few times a week) or is is your "real" schedule. I remember reading through the sleep schedules for 4 & 5 months olds, and I appreciated the one that said 7-7 all H**L breaks loose.

Mothers of Bad Nappers, Horrible Night Wakers, Too Frequent Feeders and Haters of Carseats - UNITE and banish the guilt!
Suzi

 

Sorry, my girls go down for their first nap at 10:30/11 and sleep until 12-12:30. 2nd nap starts at 2:30 and they sleep until 4:30-5. They very rarely get up before the times I listed. They have also been sleeping through the night since about 2 months until 8:30 in the morning. Bedtime gradually went from midnight (newborn) to 8:00pm around 6 months. I guess this is why I love being a twin mom! If it makes you feel better though, I have a 3 year old that has been getting up 4-5 nights a week for the last 2 years!

 

We sleep usually 10:30 to 12:30 and 3:30 to 4:30 HOWEVER Addison still sleeps in her swing!! yes, at 8 1/2 months!!! Whoops!

My schedules are usually pretty close, unless we are having a "crabby" day!!

 

Don't get me wrong, there are definitely some "bad" naps, but I definitely do not over exaggerate our success with the naptime routine. My guys nap from about 1 to 2 hours each time and we sometimes have to wake them because we don't let them sleep past 2 hours. They take 3 naps a day and sleep in their cribs for each one - they used to nap in the swing but we cut that out of their routine about a month ago. There is usually very minimal crying, but as I mentioned above, sometimes we have bad days but for the most part, they are typically good.

My success with naptimes doesn't mean that moms who can't get their kids to nap are doing something wrong. I think the purpose of the "nap" posts are meant to get tips and advice from those who do have a pretty solid routine. I found those posts very useful when I had questions about setting a routine and I like to think that now I can give back by relaying my success story.

On the flip side, my guys are horrible sleepers at night. My life is in no way perfect... what we do well at in some areas leads to struggles in others. Not to mention that I have an excellent nanny who really has done an great job getting their routine down. I like to think that I loosened the jar for her, but it would be dishonest of me to say that I did it all on my own.

 

I put mine down for a nap at 9am and they're asleep with no fussing by 9:05 or so. They wake up between 11 and 11:10. They have their lunch at 11:30 and then we usually go for an outing. They giggle the whole time they're in their carseats and by the time we reach our destination, they're usually asleep! We go back home and they go back down again for a nap at 1PM. They sleep until about 3 or 3:30 and then they wake up to eat. They stay awake until bedtime around 6pm and I see their smiling faces the next morning at 7! Oh wait, I'm sorry. Imagine the total opposite of what I just described....thaaat's more like it ardon:

 

It's hard to "read" how someone intended a post but I have to say that this one had me cracking up!!! :laughing: You are sooo right!!

Around 5-5.5 months, I started putting my girls down at 9, 1, 3 everyday. Mine have NEVER napped 9-11 and 1-3. For a while in the beginning, I was getting 30-45 minutes out of them 3-4 times per day. Eventually they went to 3 naps, same duration. Then finally, they were going down at 9 and 1 almost like clockwork. Everyday wasn't like this, but as a whole it was. My girls would sometimes nap 1 hr in the a.m. and 2 in the p.m., the next day it might be 2 hrs in the a.m. and 1 in the p.m...you get the point. BUT...what was consistent everyday was getting them down at the same time. Don't get me wrong, I didn't have an alarm or timer that went off at 9 and 1. They would go down within 15 minutes (either before or after) those times.

So when I post, I tell you what happened "on average", which was fairly often. You will definitely get there too. :hug99:

 

Our naps were still a mess at that point. Around 5.5-6 months they did start to improve. And once they were both sleeping through at 6 months, it got a lot better. I did put them down at 9 and 12, but they rarely(if ever!) slept for 2 hours!

 

HA! Mine will go down at 9 (at home anyways. At Daycare it's a whole other issue) consistently every day UNLESS something happens (like waking for 3 hours in the night) that causes one or both to sleep in, then the whole day is shot.
Okay and both don't sleep for 2 hours. 'A' will sleep for 2 hours, she needs her beauty rest. 'C' on the other hand will only sleep for 30-45 minutes and wake up SCREAMING. This is AFTER I spent 30 minutes rocking her to sleep (she gets tired around 8:30 so that's when we start the whole nap routine)

Afternoon naps go pretty much the same way. Anytime between 1-3 (again depending on the morning nap, duration thereof, etc) and again 'C' will only sleep 30-45 minutes but 'A' will sleep pretty consistently for 1.5-2 hours.

Nighttime..... boy oh boy! Down for bed around 7-7:30, after bottles, playing till they just can't play no more, and rocking 'A' to sleep for ANOTHER 30-45 minutes. Starting around 9 p.m. we are up pretty consistently ever hour to 2 hours until 2-3 a.m. One or the other will wake up either to eat or to have a pacifier put back in. Usually wake time is between 5-5:30, again barring any nighttime playdates (thats what I call them, they'll wake up for 2-3 hours and just want to play)

Okay, and everytime 'I' wakes up, she screams for a good 30 minutes, becuase she is tired but won't go back to sleep. 'A' will cry just until you pick her up and then she'll be all giggles. Also, 'A' has gone back to sleeping in the swing for naps for the most part.....

Oh and by the way, my girls are 10 months old! So yea..... any type of CONSISTENT schedule??? Nope. I WISH. I STRIVE for, but realistically I probably will never achieve....

 

UGGHHH I just typed this whole big reply and completely lost it in computer space...Anyway, my point was that I loved your post and totally get it and I am in awe of all of those with consistent schedules and without nap screamer/fighters but I also hate them a little as well JUST KIDDING LADIES!
AS FOR OUR HOUSE-
Thier 1st nap is 9ISH (depending on completely sporadic waking times, 6 or 7 alternating each baby day by day. i.e. DD will sleep until 7am one day and wake at 6am the next and DS will do it everyother day opposite his sister. They must plan this. )
Their 2nd nap is 12ISH or 1ISH depending on the length of the first nap. Usually they nap for 1.5-2 hours twice a day and 30-45 minutes once a day and they also like to alternate these naps so that one sleeps for 2hours at the same time the other decides to take a 45minuter and vice a versa (again, must be completely planned)
Their 3rd nap is up in the air and usually involves me praying at somepoint amidst all of the screaming and complaining and nap fighting. And, for some reason, during this nap the second one to go down will inevitabley wake up his/her brother/sister whom is actually in another room but bothered by the SCREAMING!
HAVE I MENTIONED that my daughter needs to go about 2-2.5 hours awake in order to take a good nap and my son has to go down within 1.5 hours of being awake so any shared schedule is already out the window.
Oh, they also protest naps like they are poison and wake once during the night, often sporadically and individually, to eat.

ANYWAY, I try sooooo hard and read all of the books and all of the posts but my children are very head strong and it is what it is!

Amy

 

Suzi :hug99:

Our nap routine is more like 8:30, 12:30 and 4:30... but right now they are both alternating yelling and giggling in their cribs for what is supposed to be their 4:30 nap. It got screwed up because they fell asleep for the 10 minute car ride home from the doctor and now they are refusing to nap. Oh well. It gets screwed up a lot, but overall they sleep when they need to and we are trying to get them into a routine and its just starting to click (at over 8 months!). There is hope. Hang in there, Leighann

 

QUOTE(serranoboys @ Nov 16 2007, 03:57 PM) [snapback]499080[/snapback]
I put mine down for a nap at 9am and they're asleep with no fussing by 9:05 or so. They wake up between 11 and 11:10. They have their lunch at 11:30 and then we usually go for an outing. They giggle the whole time they're in their carseats and by the time we reach our destination, they're usually asleep! We go back home and they go back down again for a nap at 1PM. They sleep until about 3 or 3:30 and then they wake up to eat. They stay awake until bedtime around 6pm and I see their smiling faces the next morning at 7! Oh wait, I'm sorry. Imagine the total opposite of what I just described....thaaat's more like it ardon:


LOL....I almost didn't make it to the last line what with all the eye rolling I was doing, but I made it and I love it!

 

I have never posted my schedule. ideal or otherwise. I have a lot of stuff I have to do, and a toddler---so at least half the time we're out and about while the babies "should" (I use that term verrrrry loosely) be napping. I'm not one of those people that get super crazy about schedules, and I would never miss out on an opportunity for my older son to do something just so the babies could sleep. They nap in the car, they nap in the sling, and they get some good naps at home. For me, life can't stop for naps--so I do the best I can. I started getting into crazy nap-schedule mode about a month ago with them, and to be honest--it was the most miserable time ever. I was obsessed with their sleeping schedules, and I would get so mad if they woke up early, or were "off-schedule" so after a month or so of that I realized I'm not that person, and our life isn't like that, so forget it! There, I said it. And I feel so much better

Reyna

 

Right around 5-8 months I started to get really good nappers. I was getting the 2 hours in the morning and the 2 hours in the afternoon for the most part. But that is if I was home all day. If I did an errand, they would fall asleep in the car and that would shoot at least one nap in the foot. But they might just play quietly and that would work for me too. But at about 10 months when they could pull up in the crib and talk to each other we had to separate them to get them to fall asleep. So yes, some days its a crap shoot but I think if you want to get out and not live at home all the time that it the way it has to be and you have to accept that you are going to ruin a nap.

 

I love this! Thanks for the post. You spoke my thoughts. My girls are good nappers most of the time, but then there are the days when one sleeps for 40 min. in the am and one sleeps for 2 hrs. Then vice versa in the afternoon so there's never a break. BUT - they do nap really well - I hate to say that but it's true. NOW - lets talk about night time sleeping...... that's an issue for me. And just for the record while we're on this...... what does it mean when someone says "the baby sleeps through the night with 2 feedings in between" what the #$%! - is that sleeping through? I thought sleeping through was going to sleep - and not waking mom up until morning...... sorry to thread jack - I feel your pain.....

 

I'm with you - as long as I remember that my worth as a mother is not dependent on whether or not the girls nap, I'm good. On those days that I forget that AND they don't nap, those are my bad days. But, nope, we aren't anywhere close to 9-11 and 1-3. And right now, I can't even get them to go to sleep at night without screaming, so I don't know what is going on!

Erica.

 

QUOTE(MichelleL @ Nov 16 2007, 03:08 PM) [snapback]499108[/snapback]
It's hard to "read" how someone intended a post but I have to say that this one had me cracking up!!! :laughing: You are sooo right!!


That means you got its intention right!!

 

Ha ha ha - I have no guilt!

I feed my babies when they're hungry and put them down for naps when they're tired (usually 1.5 hrs after last wakeup). They nap 45 min - 2 hrs, though usually closer to 45 min, and take 3-4 naps per day. They go down for the night between 6:30 and 7, usually have one night feeding, and are up for the day between 6:30 and 7.

Funny how good and easy life is when you aren't trying to shoehorn babies' needs into a by-the-clock schedule! :lol: There's a lot of good stuff in HSHHC, but the by-the-clock 9 and 1 thing is total HOOEY!

 

SusieQ, our babies are the same age and we live in the Twin Cities too!

My babies are terrible with naps. DH and I have been having long discussions about this, about what we can do. We try to do the 2 hour wakefulness and follow HSHHC. They don't seem over-tired in general. But DD absolutely will not sleep for more than 30 minutes. DS sometimes will, but he is really inconsistent---30 minutes, 2 hours, who knows. So if their schedule gets off, oh why I am saying if, WHEN their schedule gets off, we end up having 5 minutes here or 10 minutes there where they both are napping. They sleep great at night, 6 p.m. - 6 a.m.

But they do seem like they are overtired by the end of the day after taking their 3-4 little 30 minute naps (which end up being at all different times, there is no schedule). We try to be consistent with the soothing: in the crib, special blankie, special book beforehand, and it really doesn't seem to be working any better than anything else we tried in the past (swings, napping on walks, etc.)

Now this week to top that off DD has also started having a really hard time falling asleep for naps. She will be so sleepy, but as soon as I lay her down her eyes just pop open and she starts babbling and rolling around in her crib. She doesn't seem unhappy, so I just leave her in there and watch the clock, and she will do that for up to an hour before she falls asleep! It takes her forever! And she was super tired when I put her down. But as soon as she falls asleep, I could set a timer to her because I know that in 30 minutes she'll be rarin' to go again.

I try not to complain because it is nice how long they sleep at night. But this nap thing is mysterious to me. I keep waiting for the 1-2 hour naps to "develop" --- is it possible that they just might never develop?

 

You are so funny!

My little ones have been pretty clockwork with the naps....not 9 and 1, because DH and I like to sleep in, so we're on a two-hours-later schedule than HSHHC, but still pretty close to the times we set -- UNTIL the last couple weeks. They've hit 5 months, and are clearly sleeping too much (they still take *four* naps), or are ready for a change -- except I haven't quite figured out what that might be, and how to accomplish it.

So for now, we're just playing it by ear, and I know things will fall into place when we hit two naps a day....my older one was an 11am and 3pm napper, like clockwork, for a long, long time, until she went to one nap around 15 months....

 

QUOTE
are clearly sleeping too much


Um, is there such a thing??? :rotflmbo:

 

QUOTE(fuchsiagroan @ Nov 16 2007, 07:42 PM) [snapback]499419[/snapback]
Um, is there such a thing??? :rotflmbo:



LOL! What I meant was, we're still putting them down four times a day as always, but it's no longer working -- they've started sleeping only 10 hours at night instead of 12, so I think they need less sleep during the day.

 

My boys didn't become good nappers until around 8 months or so. Since then, though we have had a fabulous, no-fail nap schedule, 9-11 then 1-3. They still have two solid naps a day now at 18 months! I have no idea what I did to deserve such good nappers, but I must admit that they didn't sleep through the night until 16 months, so there was definitely a trade-off.

I think naps are one of those things, like sleeping through the night, first steps, first words and potty training that make every mom feel they're failing. We've all been there - just when you reach a new milestone there's something new to worry about.

 

My little guys sleep when they want to sleep. Sometimes it's a 20 minute cat nap and sometimes they are out for 2 hours. There is NO pattern or rhythm at all!

 

THANK YOU for posting this. I keep wondering if our insane nap issues are "normal" or if I am totally screwing something up! I don't wish our nap craziness on anyone... but, I must admit it's nice to know I'm not alone!!

My boys usually nap about 4 times a day... no matter what I do, I can't get more than 30-40 minutes at a time out of them (except for the occasional 3-hour nap). All day is quick nap - wake up - be fussy for 1.5 hours - fuss while going down for another nap - quick nap... and repeat!! I'll be so glad when we get over this hump and they settle into more solid napping patterns.

 

My kids have been on that schedule for months, starting at least 6 months.. still are at 13 months. I don't know what I would do without them. We do have days where we skip one or both but the majority of the time its those times!

 

I remember 4 years ago my best friend visited with her little girl and was SO strict about keeping a nap schedule. I thought she was a crazy drill sergent! I understood keeping things consistent, but we were in a different time zone!

Then I had my own little girl and I started to understand my best friend's reasonings. With my 1st DD I did follow a general schedule but always allowed a little slack depending on what was going on during the day.

Now I have two more girls and as far as napping, the babies nap when they nap. The only thing I strive for a schedule with is their eating schedule. Sophie loves to sleep. Sadie loves to look around and talk. It is too funny because sometimes when I put them down for a nap, I'll go back and check on them an little later and Sadie is SO wide-eyed that I have to laugh and pick her up to play or cuddle! Meanwhile, Sophie could care less and continues to enjoy her beauty sleep.

Now, I will admit that I am very strict with the nighttime sleep and my DH and I have benefitted from this in that we get to sleep from 10PM to almost 5AM.

When the twins get a little older, I will hope they fall into a bit of a routine like their older sister. Once my 1st DD got to two naps a day, she really did go down about 10:00/10:30 and slept for 1-1.5 hours, then she would go down again about 4:00/4:30. I didn't follow a book. I only read a whole "baby" book when I had twins (even then it was the funny one that was written with the style of Bergdorf Blondes or The Devil Wears...) So I didn't know there was an actual theory about when babies are "supposed" to take naps!

Is the nap theory supposed to be the same as having your hands on the steering wheel at 10 and 2?
I either have one at 11 or one at 3!

 

Mine have been on the 9 am and the 1 pm nap schedule since 4 months without much trouble.
At first the first nap was more 1 1/2 - 2 hours, now it's only an hour or so. They go back down at 1.15 pm and sleep until 3ish. Then in bed at 6.30 pm and we start the day at 7 pm (with unfortunately still one feeding at around 5.30/6.00 am but there is no way I am starting the day at that time).

My oldest was on exactly the same schedule but her first nap was always shorter, she didn't go on a 2-nap schedule until 6 months and she would sleep from 6 pm until 7 am straight (4-24 months). She's still a perfect sleeper.

 

aaahhhhhhhh, so refreshing!

i have always read these schedules and felt a sense of awe and failure all at once.

we are almost 5 1/2 months and sleep has gone CRAZY around here. my good sleeper is rolling over and getting mad/ screaming in the night & at naps. my non-sleeper is being put down for naps without protest but still wakes up at 30-45 minutes. she usually sleeps well at night but has been waking earlier and earlier and cannot be soothed.

it's so discouraging/ distressing sometimes but then i think...we have happy & healthy babies that will eventually sleep...even if it takes another few months.

thanks for the post... glad to know i'm not the only one struggling with nap mayhem!

 

Mine usually sleep from 9:00 till 10:15 and 1:00 till 2:15 sometimes a longer or shorter,but they alway go to bed at the same time. They do sleep throught the night also, the odd time that they wake. They usually sleep till 7:00 so sometimes I am amazed that they are ready for bed at 9:00 already, maybe its just habit. This has been their shedule for at least the past 4 months. i remember that around the 4 - 6 months sleeping and napping here were a utter disaster, but everything just kind of falls into place, with a bit of guidance

 

Great post, and funny too!

I did follow HSHHC because someone told me it was their "bible" and I was clueless so I read it. Naps were a mess until after 6 months, but not for lack of trying. Then I started napping them in seperate rooms, and had to let DS CIO. They do go down at 9 and 1, and I would say 80% or more of the time, they both take decent naps with little fussing...which usually means 1 to 1.5 hours. Once in a blue moon one will sleep closer to two hours. We were still taking random 3rd naps until about 7.5-8 months.

I live way the heck away from anything, so we are home bodies and if we do go out, it's after their 2nd nap. About once a week we will break schedule for the afternoon nap and do something, and they are usually pretty good, but I'm one of those people that does get a little freaky if they don't sleep and eat by the clock. Which is kinda funny, I NEVER thought I'd be one of those people...also NEVER thought I'd have twins! I think it's easier too since I don't have older kids...that's a whole other ballpark I'm sure!

 

QUOTE(mrsfussypants @ Nov 16 2007, 10:40 PM) [snapback]499267[/snapback]
I have never posted my schedule. ideal or otherwise. I have a lot of stuff I have to do, and a toddler---so at least half the time we're out and about while the babies "should" (I use that term verrrrry loosely) be napping. I'm not one of those people that get super crazy about schedules, and I would never miss out on an opportunity for my older son to do something just so the babies could sleep. They nap in the car, they nap in the sling, and they get some good naps at home. For me, life can't stop for naps--so I do the best I can. I started getting into crazy nap-schedule mode about a month ago with them, and to be honest--it was the most miserable time ever. I was obsessed with their sleeping schedules, and I would get so mad if they woke up early, or were "off-schedule" so after a month or so of that I realized I'm not that person, and our life isn't like that, so forget it! There, I said it. And I feel so much better

Reyna



I agree. Naps are all over the place for my girls. We have older children that have things going on too. My girls sleep when they get sleepy. Otherwise I am not stressing over it anymore.

Missy

 

Mine did nap from 9:30-11:30am and 1:00-3:00 from 6-11 months and from 9:30-11:30am and 1:30-3:15pm from 11-17 months. At 17 months we went down to one nap. Mine liked their sleep and I considered myself lucky!

 

I don't want to jinx myself but . . .

My boys were HORRIBLE nappers (1-2 naps a day, maybe, no more than 20-30 minutes at a time) until - literally - their 6 month b-day. maybe it's too soon to let my breath out but it's been a few days and they've napped well and LONG. They wake between 5:45-6:15, and go down for the first nap at 8:00-8:20. These babies that used to sleep for 20 minutes at a time are now sleeping 1:15-2 hours each. They wake, eat, etc etc and then nap again (2+ hours each!) in the early afternoon.

I hope this isn't a fluke. If it isn't then it really means there's hope for everyone!!!!