Nanny questions

Discussion in 'The Toddler Years(1-3)' started by vtlakey, Aug 22, 2010.

  1. vtlakey

    vtlakey Well-Known Member

    We are considering hiring a nanny because I am not happy with our boys' daycare. I have been exchanging emails with a potential nanny and she has asked some questions that I haven't thought of. First off she is agreeable to a pay rate of $10 an hour or $400 a week, which is good. Then there is the whole withholding taxes which is another issue I'll try and research more later. But she asked if we were agreeable to paying $100 towards her health insurance (I assume monthly). That seems reasonable to me and I have no problem with that. She also asked if we would be paying for any vacation or sick days. I think it seems reasonable to be willing to pay her for some sick days, but how do you set a limit? As for vacation I would think that would only be an option after a grace period or trial run, but after a grace period then I'm not sure what is a reasonable amount of vacation. What do you other twin moms allow for vacation for your nannies??

    I appreciate any and all advice relating to nannies! I really don't know what is standard practice and I'm sure there are plenty of other nanny related things I haven't thought of. So share any "beware" stories too. And did you have your nanny sign a contract outlining these kinds of things? TIA!
     
  2. tpowers

    tpowers Well-Known Member

    I have friend who has a nanny and she brought up all of these things to me. I was going to hire a nanny and hired my mother-in-law. Different story. I think that you can decide whether that is your responsibility or hers as far as taxes goes. I am not sure on that. I would agree to that up front so you don't have discrepency between your taxes and hers. If she is purchasing her own insurance I too think that is reasonable. I would set a limit on sick days maybe a week per year. You don't want her to come to work if she is sick because she can't afford to miss. Also, what my friend did for vacation is she had 1 week a year they went out of town and they paided her for that and planned in advance so she could plan hers around it. I would have her sign a contract to cover both of you. That sets out the job in writing for her and your expectations. You have to remember you are her employer and this is her living.
    Another thing to discuss is house work. Do you want her to do light cleaning or just clean up after the kids? What kind of cooking etc. I care more that she is spending time with my kids than if my house is clean. Some want their house clean.
    I hope that helps.
     
  3. DATJMom

    DATJMom Well-Known Member

    We went through a Nanny Agency. It was the only way that DH and I felt comfortable. They did all the screenings, drug, social security, driving record, criminal, etc. Then we told them what we wanted and they sent me resumes of potential applicants. I googled nanny interview questions and got a great starting point and the more I read and interviewed, the better the questions got. We had one Nanny when we lived in FL. She was great with the kids and us. I have zero bad things to say about the entire process-start to finish. In fact, we are about to go through it again as we have moved out of state. GL!
     
  4. LeeandJenn15

    LeeandJenn15 Well-Known Member

    Definitely prepare a contract showing everything - all the research I did always said to do that!

    So far, we haven't had to limit sick days, but we have switched nannies. Our first one wouldn't watch the kids when they were sick, so we'd have to take off work, and then she'd end up getting whatever they had anyway, so that was more time off for us. It just didn't work out. Our current nanny doesn't mind watching the kids when they are sick (she might wear gloves and doctor's masks - but that's fine - we'd rather she err on the side of caution). We each get 3 weeks of vacation from work a year. We pay her when we use vacation, since we are getting paid. If she has to miss and we have to pay someone else (has happened once or twice), then we don't pay her - her wages basically go to the substitute.

    We don't give her any vacation besides when we take off.

    We do withhold for taxes because I talked to a CPA about it and he said that's the law. She is not "contract" labor (which would be a 1099 form), because we are really her boss and decide everything for our home. It's not too hard - the calculations are not bad - you can find them on the IRS.gov website. As an example, we withhold 6.3% for Social Sec & 1.5% for Medicare. For the FICA: we withhold 5%. We, as her employers, are then responsible to pay some to Medicare & Soc Sec for her. So, when I think about the money that actually comes out of our pocket, it's actually what she makes plus an additional 7.5% for the employer's part of Med/SS - in your case, another $30/week.

    Also, overtime gets kind of tricky. Legally, you are supposed to pay extra when she's required to work more than 40 hours a week. Just be aware.

    We don't provide any money for health insurance - so I don't know what that will do to the taxes...I'd definitely research it, and meet with a CPA - it was worth the $50 it cost us to get all that straight for us.

    I'm trying to think if there's anything else I've learned...

    We have a great deal, and know it!! She keeps our house cleaner than I would, and our kids are well provided for. Good luck!
     
  5. vtlakey

    vtlakey Well-Known Member

    Thanks so much for all of the replies! And Momof4Angels, you bring up a great point regarding vacation days. DH and I work for a state agency so we get a decent amount of vacation time (though its dwindled this year due to our babies getting sick so much in day care!) and we also get a ton of state holidays (Labor Day, July 4th, Thanksgiving, Christmas, etc). So I would think her getting those holidays paid would be a pretty good starting point, and then of course if we go on vacation too. Though we just went to the beach the other week and I said I didn't want to go back unless we could take a nanny next time, LOL. I was also just looking at her care.com profile and it says she isn't willing to care for sick children, which causes me concern for the reasons you mention. I'll see if she is willing to be flexible on that or not.

    Thanks again and if anybody else has anymore helpful hints or just wants to share their nanny story I am all ears! :)
     
  6. vharrison1969

    vharrison1969 Well-Known Member

    I think getting everything out in the open beforehand is really important so there are no misunderstandings. Spell out what should be done in case of sickness, emergencies, vacation, tardiness, etc.

    Our agreement regarding vacation/holidays is that we give her every paid holiday that I get (a whopping 6 days per year, woohoo <_< ), a week paid vacation at Christmas, and the opportunity to make up any other days missed. We recently attempted to go camping for a week (long story) so we paid her for the week and she will owe us 5 days (one of which she will make up this weekend).

    I would also question your candidate closely about her statement that she won't watch sick kids. Kids get sick a lot, even when they're not in daycare, so it would be a huge pain if you had to take those days off.

    I don't have any horror stories to share except for my first nanny who was probably on time a grand total of 3 times in the 6 months she worked for us. :mad: She was once 1.5 hours late! :woah: We ended up firing her. Make sure that your nanny is "geographically compatible" ;) and that she has reliable transportation.

    I guess the hardest thing for me is treating my nanny like an employee; she's really more like a member of the family so I sometimes have a hard time being critical. It's a fine line to walk. :)
     
  7. MarchI

    MarchI Well-Known Member

    Whitehousenannies.com has a good calculator on their site that shows how much taxes/other things you need to take from their paycheck. I would limit sick time to less than you get each year. IF you get 2 weeks, limit hers to 1 week so you can keep some of your sick time in case you get sick. As for vacation, I would offer to pay for her vacation time, that is just a decent thing to do. As PP said, make sure you have a contract. BTW, I am jealous that you are 100 miles away and your nanny costs are 1/2 of what it would cost me in NOVA.
     
  8. mommyto3boys

    mommyto3boys Well-Known Member

    We have had a nanny for our 3 boys since I went back to work after the twins were born. She works Monday-Thursday 7:30-5:30 (I only work Mon-Thurs as well). We sat down with her prior to writing up a contract and went over what her expectations and desires were as far as salary, vacation, etc and then made her an offer. We give her 5 sick days a year and pay those out in cash at the end of the year if she doesn't use them. She generally works if the kids are sick as long as she is not sick as well. If there are days when multiple kids are sick, either DH or I try to stay home to help out because we know how hard it is to take care of 1 sick kid, let alone multiple sick kids. Last year she didn't use any sick days, but this year she has used 4 so far. Our whole house, including the nanny, got the flu in March, so all of us were taking sick days! For vacation, we generally take 2 weeks each year (1 in the summer and 1 around the holidays) and give her those same 2 weeks. If she were to ask for any additional vacation, it would be without pay. However, she got married in May this year and we gave her a week for her honeymoon paid as her wedding present. For holidays, DH gets twice the number of holidays that I do and we give our nanny any holidays that DH gets. If a holiday happens to fall on a Friday when she doesn't work, she does not get to use that holiday at another time. We do not pay anything towards her healthcare at this time, but that has been mentioned as a possibility in the future. What you may want to do with the person you are looking at is hold that out as an incentive to add on after a certain number of months if things go well.

    For employment taxes, yes, you are required to pay them. The PP is correct that a nanny is not a contract employee and you have to pay employment taxes. I know many people pay their nannies "under the table", but technically that is illegal. We actually pay our share of our nanny's employment taxes, as well as her share. It costs us a little more, but we are paying her a great rate for watching 3 kids and we really like her, so we feel it is worth it. Since we pay both parts, we don't withhold anything from her pay each week and just pay it with our own taxes (through either quarterly estimates or increased withholding from our own paycheck). She pays her own federal and state estimated quarterly payments to cover her income tax requirement, so we do not have to file anything extra for that.

    As for a contract, I would highly recommend having a written one just to make sure you have everything covered. We included all of the above information in ours, as well as a brief description of what we expected her to do in caring for the kids or around the house.

    Good luck and if you have any more questions, please feel free to ask!
     
  9. vtlakey

    vtlakey Well-Known Member

    All great replies ladies - thanks again! Now I just need to convince my DH to give this nanny a try <_< He is semi-receptive to the idea but he isn't totally sold on it either. I think its mainly from a financial standpoint - $275 per week in daycare vs. $455 week for a nanny ($400 + $25 health insurance stipend + $30 taxes).

    So the disadvantages of a nanny are:

    - costs about $180 more per week
    - all eggs are in one basket (we'll be one big illness or emergency away from needing emergency childcare)
    - taxes are more complicated
    - no socialization with other toddlers
    - giving up our spot in daycare, and almost all daycares around here have waiting lists making for a stressful reentry back into daycare down the road.

    But the advantages are:

    - we won't have to rush around to get them ready and fed every morning, drive to daycare, and then pick up. She can be at our house in time to feed them breakfast.
    - less exposure to germs (so hopefully less time off from work, provided they stay healthy and so does the nanny)
    - a tidier house (if she could just keep the kitchen and living room area, where the twins spend 90% of their time at home, tidied up that would be a HUGE help)
    - would make pedi appts easier to deal with given our home location and the pedi office (she could even go with one of us, so both DH and myself wouldn't have to miss time off from work)


    If you can think of any other advantages I am forgetting about please remind me! :) It's like I told DH we won't be using a nanny forever, probably only 6 - 9 months, when around 2 years old the boys can go back to daycare. And if it this girl doesn't work out then we can put them back in daycare before then (hopefully without too much hassle).

    And marchl, that is one of the few perks of living in a small town :) But our salaries tend to be much less than in NOVA too so I guess it all evens out. After our recent trip to the beach, and having to get on the beltway around DC, I told my DH that nobody could pay me to live in NOVA because everybody drives like idiots! :lol: Gas was also 50 cent more a gallon there. Everything is just so darned expensive up there, including nannies ;)
     
  10. vharrison1969

    vharrison1969 Well-Known Member

    More pros:
    1. You can ask her to go on vacation with you, which is more expensive, but might be worthwhile for the extra pair of hands.
    2. If you're running late coming home from work, you have more flexibility and won't incur any late charges.
    3. A built-in babysitter that you know you can trust. We ask our nanny to watch the boys on date nights and the odd weekend day when we have to do something.
    4. More control over what your LOs eat. Unless you send all food to daycare, then you're dependent upon what they feed your kids. I like it that I set the menu (I have lots of easy choices available for her to cook like sweet potato fries, fish fillets, etc. plus leftovers).

    Another con:
    You will never be alone in the house again. I don't regret having a nanny 1 bit, but when I'm sick it's not even worth it to take the day off, because there is no rest. There is nowhere in the house I can go and not hear the boys, which means no sleep and too much temptation to go and spend time with them instead of recuperating. :)

    Something else I thought of: If you know that you'll only have the nanny for 6-9 months, make sure she knows this at the outset so there are no hard feelings when you have to let her go.

    Hope this helps! :)
     
  11. mommyto3boys

    mommyto3boys Well-Known Member

    If you are comfortable with the nanny taking your kids places, you can mark no socialization off the "con" list. Our nanny takes our boys to story time, the local park, play dates with other kids, etc. She actually has a few friends that nanny for kids in or near our neighborhood and they get all of the kids together once or twice a week to play. At the same time, another advantage to a nanny is more one on one time with your kids. A few other advantages are sleep schedules that may work better for your kids rather than the daycare imposed schedule, less stress in the evenings when getting home from work and possibly help with cooking dinner. When we had our oldest in daycare, picking him up nad driving home added at least 15-20 minutes to our total trip home in the evenings. Now, we just go straight home and have extra time with the kids. Also, our nanny does not cook (she quickly let us know that she has little to no cooking skills:)), but we make casseroles the night before and leave them in the fridge with cooking instructions. She will pop them in the oven so they will be done right when we get home. This makes evenings so much smoother.

    Good luck winning the battle for a nanny. It wasn't a very hard decision for us as our nanny is actually cheaper than daycare would be for 3 kids, but she is still worth every penny!
     
  12. vtlakey

    vtlakey Well-Known Member

    We are meeting this potential nanny at our house today at 1pm. I looking forward to it! And yes, I plan to let her know that we may only want a nanny for another 9 months or so. However, we may also like the nanny so well by then and everything that she does for us and our boys that we decide we can't part ways so soon! Regarding her taking the boys places, I think I would be fine with that later on after we feel comfortable with her. I figure she could drive to the local library where there is a well traveled trail and she could take them for stroller walks. And maybe I'll sign them up for kindermusic and things like that where she could take them a few times a week. Her care.com profile also says she will do some cooking as well so that's a bonus!

    It's a big decision but if we like her and feel like she would be a good match for us and our boys I totally want to give this nanny thing a try! And I'm pretty sure DH will go along with whatever I want to do, but I do want him to be on board as well and not just agree to it to make me happy.
     
  13. trudyhm@att.net

    [email protected] Well-Known Member

    I have one suggestion for your interview: make sure you go over with her exactly what is acceptable in regards to discipline. I had a sitter from a good agency spank my then 10-month-old for pushing food around her tray instead of eating it. The agency doesn't allow spanking so I never discussed it. I learned a huge lesson there.
     
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