My twins can't come visit in Hospital because of new visitor policy!

Discussion in 'Pregnancy Help' started by twinsmommy11007, Dec 1, 2009.

  1. twinsmommy11007

    twinsmommy11007 Well-Known Member

    My hospital and most surrounding in MA have changed visiting policy only allowing those 18 years and older in good health to visit patients. This is to protect the patients form H1N1 exposure. I understand the reasoning for the change but am very stressed. This means my 3 year old twins can't see the baby after he is born and can only see me if I meet them in the lobby for a quick visit. My children have never ever been away from me for more then 8 hrs. and never overnite. I am just hoping that I get out of the hospital early (having a scheduled c-section). Trying not to stress. Anyone else have the same problem?
     
  2. MrsWright

    MrsWright Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    I'm not due until summer so I'm hoping our policy will change back but yes, the hospital I work at has the same policy. I know it will be hard but even a trip to the lobby will be good for everyone:) Good luck!!!! I know its got to be tough!
     
  3. nateandbrig

    nateandbrig Well-Known Member

    :grouphug: I'm sorry you're stressing!!! I agree that a trip to the lobby will be good for all of you! When I had my youngest the twins were only 13 months old so they didn't come. It was very hard to not be with them but it also worked out because it gave me some really good bonding time with my new one. Also because it was a c-section I think it helped me recover faster. I had my c-section on a Monday morning and left Wed. Good luck!!
     
  4. Susanna+3

    Susanna+3 Well-Known Member

    I think the same thing will happen at my hospital too. I'm actually okay with it because I'd rather not have the kids pick something up at the hospital! (I'm more concerned that they'll get sick from a visit to the hospital than vice versa!) But in my previous deliveries I have had the kids visit once just to help with the transition...so they can see the new sibling and understand who will be coming home with mommy... I think this time around I'm not so concerned because the 3 big kids are all old enough to fully comprehend the addition...they all remember my 2 year old coming home when she was born. And my 2 year old is too young to understand what is happening even with a visit to the hospital! I think what will help your children is to explain to them ahead of time what will happen, and how many nights you expect to be away. Have whoever is watching them do something special with them. Maybe letting them stay up 'late' those nights and do a movie with snacks as a special treat. I find that when a grandparent is spoiling my child they rarely miss me if it's less than 3 days...
     
  5. Meximeli

    Meximeli Well-Known Member

    The Under 18 crowd can't visit in hospitals in many parts of the world. Been that way for who knows how long. No kid visitors in any hospitals anywhere near where I live.

    I also remember as a child in the US I had a friend who was in the hospital. I could visit her only in the pediatrics play room. Which was just off the stair well. From the lobby I was allowed to go right up the stairs and right into the play room with an orderly and my dad. I was not allowed to go down to her room.
     
  6. twinsmommy11007

    twinsmommy11007 Well-Known Member

    I am having a c-section and the dr said standard is 4 nights so tuesday to saturday. if i am doing well then maybe 3 nights. my husband will be with them every night and then it is going to be between grandparents and my sister (who they see everyday, she has a little one their age.) I am probably more stressed about me not seeing them then them actually missing me. I have never been away from them over night and I am home with them everyday. I am trying to look at the positive side of bonding with the baby and being able to rest. we will just have to see how it goes.
     
  7. MSB1203

    MSB1203 Well-Known Member

    I haven't even thought to ask, b/c my bestfriends little girl got to visit her son when he was born, but that was in May. The policy could have changed considering all the N1H1 concerns. Thats a long time for them to be away from mommy. I'm so sorry that you all have to deal with that stress. :(
     
  8. ljmcisaac

    ljmcisaac Well-Known Member

    If you have a video camera, you should take a quick video (1-2 min) of you and the baby saying hi to the new siblings, so they can watch it at home. And maybe they can send something special -- or just a photo of them -- to the baby.
     
  9. summerfun

    summerfun Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    :hug: I'm sorry about that. I know all the hospitals around me (so I have heard) have that same policy now due to H1N1. I know it must be hard. :hug:
     
  10. nateandbrig

    nateandbrig Well-Known Member

    wow 4 nights is standard, I didn't know that... My oldest was an emergency c-section and it was only 3 nights, same with the twins who were scheduled. My youngest I knew what to expect and how to help me recover faster (get up as soon as possible etc.) so I was able to get out after 2 nights. But def. follow your doctors orders and do what you feel comfortable with!
    The time goes by pretty fast so do enjoy your time with the new baby!! :grouphug: It is harder on us then them, I agree.
     
  11. HollyP

    HollyP Well-Known Member

    Yes this is common nationwide, and I think a few others have posted about it. I've accepted it. My 4yo won't be able to visit me at all nor his new twin brothers later this month for the same reason. I just keep reminding myself - it's for good reason. I wouldn't want anyone bringing a child into an environment where something dangerous could possibly be passed along.

    My suggestion is to create a care package for them to open each day, and prepare them in advance to understand they will meet their new sibling when you and baby come home. Honestly they will survive, it will be harder on you. When my DS visited me in the hospital in September (I had pancreatitis) he was so much more interested in the stuff in the room, and ready to leave in five minutes LOL). And I wouldn't anticipate an early departure if you're having a c/s. The standard is usually at least four days/nights I think. But maybe you'll be lucky!

    P.S. I'm taking two pics of my DS to place in the bassinets of my twins - at least they will see something of their brother early on ;)
     
  12. traci.finley

    traci.finley Well-Known Member

    Oh, no! I didn't even think to ask at my hospital! Where I had the twins, only siblings were allowed on the L&D floor but once I was in a regular room my nephews came to see me, too. I am having the new baby in a different state and just assumed the girls could come see me! I feel the same as you ... that it will be really hard on ME to not see THEM for 3-4 days!!! Also, they are V-E-R-Y much Mommy's girls and have never been away from me (SAHM) for longer than a few hours! I SO know how you feel! I hope that my hospital is OK with sibs and if not, I may be messaging YOU for support on how to get through the separation ;) Though, it is probably true that it will help you recover and bond if you can just focus on your new baby ... in a perfect world ... but in MY reality, I may spend half the time enjoying it and half the time feeling guilty!! I'm so sorry ... and yes, a little campout (maybe including some ice cream) in the lobby every afternoon may be very helpful for you all!!
     
  13. twinsmommy11007

    twinsmommy11007 Well-Known Member


    thanks to all for the support...i am just hoping to do really well and get out sooner. i plan to have my husband give them daily treats and their birthday is the 10th
    (5 days after c-section) so plan to have a cake and make it extra special. good luck to all.
     
  14. sullivanre

    sullivanre Well-Known Member

    This is a very informative thread guys. I'll be doing a little research on this.

    I hope your kids do well for those days without you, Mama.
     
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