My super long birth story

When I found out I was pregnant with Annabelle, I knew I did not want to have a repeat C-section. I’d had a life-long fear of vaginal birth I think maybe due to watching too many bad TV shows/movies of women who looked like they wanted to die rather than feel that pain when I was a kid.

So I was in a place of denial for a good 5 months where I knew I was pregnant, knew I didn’t want another C-section but was too afraid to contemplate a vaginal birth. Pain meds were out to me as I believe that more interventions lead to a greater likelihood of a C-section. I’d ruled out the Bradley Method as I thought it looked annoying to breathe that way and it didn’t seem to work. Then I discovered Hypnobabies. It promised an easy, pain-free, comfortable childbirth in which you were awake. I was very intrigued and tried to sign up with two different classes (by this time easily 6.5 months pregnant) but it didn’t work out with either class. I thought I’d try one more time and met S; who thought I’d be a great candidate for Hypnobabies.

Class started and I’d hoped to finish it before Annabelle was born- I was projected to be 37.5 weeks at that time (exactly when I’d given birth to my boys). I tried to jump into Hypnobabies with both feet and really wasn’t sure it was going to work for me until class #3 when during hypnosis your Birth Partner squeezes your arm. I was surprised when the other pregnant lady complained that her arm hurt. I certainly didn’t feel any pain; just pressure like they said I would. On the way home, I was talking about this with Ben and asked him to demonstrate how hard he’d been touching me. It was shocking that it did, in fact, hurt!

I finished the class and on March 7th felt waves or contractions. I tried not to be too excited, just sent Ben to work with an understanding he might have to go home. I texted my doula, R, and called my friend, K, who took the boys and me last minute shopping, hoping walking might work. We went to the mall and bought nursing bras (better late than never, right?!) and Target where I stocked up on easy things for a babysitter to feed the boys. My contractions went from every 5-7 minutes down to every 10. They’d pick up when I’d rest but stall out when I was moving. Eventually as afternoon approached they stopped. I thought if I took a nap they’d come back, but they didn’t. I’d gotten so excited that today was THE day I’d meet my daughter that I was pretty disheartened. I vowed not to get excited again next time.

Saturday came and I was due on Sunday. Saturday was supposed to be fun but I was in a foul mood. I’d had a headache off and on through the day which is not typical for me so when K came over that night she insisted we go to take my blood pressure someplace. It took 3 stores to find a place that had a blood pressure cuff but we found it- and it was elevated. I called the midwives who were decidedly unconcerned as I had an appointment on Monday and it wasn’t that high to them. K rubbed my ankles (supposedly this brings on labor) and went home. DH and I, who’d had a tiff earlier in the day, made up and went to bed around midnight.

At 3:45a, I woke up 100% awake and alert. I was really confused why I was so awake, but thought I’d just needed to go pee. I stood up and leaked. Then it all made sense- my water had broken! I tried not to be excited, as I hadn’t felt a contraction since Wednesday. I thought I’d pee and go back to sleep. As I climbed into bed, I had a contraction. I started timing them but didn't want to wake up DH or any of my team up yet as it was still near 4am. I turned on my Hypnobabies CDs and focused on relaxing. At 4:30 I woke up DH and he started timing me. I was averaging every 4-5 minutes at this point. At 5 I called K and texted R. K and her daughter who was watching the boys would shower and grab bagels and be over (it’s about 25 minutes). R texted back she was supposed to sing at worship today and keep her posted. My waves started coming more and more and I was so happy and relaxed - it was no trouble at all! I texted R that they were getting closer together and she asked if I needed support yet. I remember thinking if she doesn’t get here soon she’s going to miss it so I said yes. K and her daughter finally got to the house around 7 and we chatted for awhile until it was obvious I was pretty far along. I started shaking and vomited up my crackers and juice I’d eaten a couple of hours ago. K didn’t straighten her hair, just scarfed down ½ a bagel as we decided to go to the hospital.

I was so happy to go to the hospital- I looked really cute in a green and white striped shirt and a black skirt but by the time I got the hospital my shirt didn’t cover my bump because it’d dropped so much. I felt confident I’d done transition at home and we were about to have a baby! My waves had slowed at this point (8a) to every 6 minutes or so but I figured that was my body’s way of making sure I didn’t have Annabelle in the car- fine by me!

We check in at triage and she tells me to use the bathroom. I comply and they take me back to the world’s crappiest triage room. It may have doubled as a broom closet. There were 4 IV poles in it, no supplies (fetal monitoring belts, or the test to see if my water has broken), bathroom or chairs for K, DH or R to sit on.

I start to get really uncomfortable laying down giving them the strip. I’m waiting for my favorite midwife, Kathy, who came in for a shift at 7 to check me. I’m SOOOO uncomfortable and just want to be checked. My doula, R, gets in and asks if she can touch my hair. It felt amazing although I didn’t know at the time I would like it or even care. I have to use the bathroom so they make me walk down 5 mostly empty rooms to a bathroom. I don’t want to have a contraction while walking so I walk as fast as I’ve ever walked, I think. I had no idea I could walk that fast 40 weeks pregnant.

Kathy comes in, finally, and checks me. 3cm. My reply is “You are kidding me?! NO. NO WAY” I’m so disheartened- here I am thinking I’m 7, 8 or even complete and it’s getting hard to relax and I’m hardly dilated? DH tells me to come to the bathroom with him and we’ll go relax. I charge down the hall again, this time a nurse sees me and holds up a hand to stop me. I don’t stop but in mid-stride say “Bathroom” and keep going. The look of shock on her face was pretty funny in hindsight.

We get to the bathroom and DH forcibly relaxes me. He gets in my face and reminds me that Hypnobabies works and I can do this. I need to center myself and work on relaxing as I was starting to tense up and be uncomfortable. He re-centers me, we work through a couple of waves on the toilet together and I am calm again. We re-enter the triage room and I am a different person. Both K and R comment later to me that the look on my face and change in my demeanor is palpable- I am determined to have a baby and nothing will stop me.

Kathy has checked me for my water breaking and it turns out it has so they will admit me (which is lucky in hindsight!). We move to the L&D room around 9:45 and as I’m waiting for the elevator I notice I’m having contractions every minute and think, 3cm, really? Who contracts every minute or two at 3cm?

We get to my room and all I want to do is get in the tub. On my way to the toilet I decide I WILL be in the tub soon so I start walking across the room, stripping out of every piece of clothing on the way. I make an announcement that I’m getting naked- which would absolutely shock anybody who has known me awhile as I’m pretty private. I get on the toilet and start begging to get into the tub. They say they want another 20 minute strip on me at which point my husband is my absolute hero. He refuses on my behalf; they told me I just needed 1 strip in triage and I did it and I wanted in the tub so fill up the tub! I was so proud of him for advocating for me when I needed it!

This is when time gets fuzzy and I really don’t know how long I spend in the tub. All I remember is the contractions changed and did not hurt, per se, as they never hurt. Hypnobabies is all about contractions/waves feeling like the pressure of a gentle hug. At some point I felt the pressure turn more into a boa constrictor, but it never felt painful as most people describe. During each wave I would say “Here we go” and DH would get very, very close to me- forehead to forehead and give me relaxation cues and prompts to help me relax into the wave. R and K would put a cold cloth on my head and back as I needed the sensation of cold to sort of snap me out of the sensation of pressure. I started pushing gently in the tub; not much, just testing out the feeling. I also ripped out my IV line at one point but didn’t care enough to tell anybody (it was an accident). I only remember colors - red, black and shadows but had my eyes closed much of the time.

Kathy thought maybe Annabelle had pooped (turns out she hadn’t) so she made me get out of the tub. I wasn’t happy to hear this but raced out to the bed and leaned over it. By this time I was pushing. I had a cervical lip that she held aside. My waves changed and I didn’t feel the intense pressure anymore, just sensation. It didn’t hurt a bit to push; in fact I was convinced that my pushing was doing nothing. I had to have people tell me that it was working and I was getting her down and out a little more each time- everyone had to reassure me.

I vocalized as they taught me, not because I had to but figured if it could work to open things up and get her out I’d try it! I was leaning across the bed to push, standing, and holding onto Ks’ hand. Eventually she held my other hand and I thought I might lift her into air I was holding on so hard. I had no idea that she loved the feeling of me giving birth (this is how she described it) and it was a sacred moment for her. I heard her praying for Annabelle’s safe arrival and thought that maybe R should join in but was too focused to say anything. Weirdly, later, I told her I heard her and she was pretty dumbfounded- she’d been praying silently.

I saw DH look at Kathy (who was squatting under me) to see if I was making pushing progress and saw Kathy shake her head no. This little head shake made me so mad! Here I was working my butt off and it wasn’t enough?! I’d show them!

At this time a woman came in the room wanting me to sign C-section release forms which she tried to explain to me. I was not nice, I was not polite, I was PO’d that she would dare interrupt what I was doing and expressed it. I also signed my name twice, the second time a wave was coming on so I punctured the paper at least 4 times. Whoops!

They had me move to hands and knees to push which I couldn’t do very well- my legs were weak. So they suggested the squat bar. I did not want to squat. I hate squatting in everyday life and wouldn’t even practice it during our practice birth class! I whined a little more and got into position. Turns out it worked and I really liked it. I pushed a few times and then had a moment of pain as I was pushing her out-she came out with her left hand on her face which clawed me on the way out. But she was out! They laid her on me, purple, but I didn’t care as I knew her cord was providing all the oxygen she needed. I was so happy to have done it- a vaginal, low intervention, no meds birth I just kept saying “I did it! I did it!”

They had DH cut the cord which was short and took her over for a look see. Eventually I felt the same weird non-pain urge to get the placenta out but whined again- hey, I’d just delivered a baby and didn’t feel like I should have to do more work! So Kathy gave a tug while I pushed and it came out whole, very easy.

So Annabelle Rose (& here) was born at 10:55a, weighing 8 pounds, 8.2 ounces, with a 14 inch head. I evidently dialated from 3-10cm and pushed out a baby in an hour. It did not feel like an hour, but it was. K told me that she went to go get a glass of water for me and found the nurses and midwife in the hall conferring to make sure my chart was correct as everything happened too quickly to note it down at the time.

This is where it gets gross. TMI to the extreme, people. Final warning: this is not for the squeamish.

I started to hemorrhage. I started losing enough blood they gave me Pitocin twice, I think. This is when it’s revealed that I ripped out the IV- which amazes everybody as NOBODY had any indication! The Pitocin didn’t help. As Kathy's stitching me up I’m in stirrups, anxious to nurse my squalling baby, watching March Madness, making jokes and snacking as I finally have my appetite back.

They call in an OB because there is so much blood Kathy can’t see my cervix and can’t tell if it is torn. It’s not, I have a blood clot at the top of my uterus. The OB has to go in to retrieve it but asks if I want narcotics. I’m no hero- my baby was born and this procedure did not look anywhere near natural. I wait for the drugs, get a shot of something and she goes to work. I did use my relaxation techniques but wow did that hurt. I remember staring at a fuzzy on the ceiling just waiting for the pain to stop. She gets out the clot and I’m told Kathy holds up her hand to shield the fountain of blood that pours out of me. The OB wants to use Cytotec to stop my bleeding to which I immediately stop her and ask why and what are my alternatives. I'd researched Cytotec before and did not want it used on me. I ask to nurse Annabelle to help clamp down my uterus to which she gets testy and says that ‘might work’ very doubtfully. Meanwhile, I can’t get the baby near me because I have so many personnel attending to me which is uber annoying. The OB asks me to stop eating and drinking in case I need a transfusion which I do. She finishes up and leaves; now Kathy can RE-stitch me up.

I spent approximately 3 hours being stitched, un-stitched (when I had the clot removed) and re-stitched. The recovery absolutely sucked. What was funny is that I had no idea it was as serious as it was and I was just plain irritated that all these people were in my way and I couldn’t do what I wanted to do.

* * *

All in all it was an amazing birth and I'm so grateful for everybody there. I was more singularly focused than I've ever been in my entire life; probably more than I'll ever be again. I would totally give birth again, without drugs (and I'd do it at home, too!). If I can do it, anybody can.

 

Aww Michelle, that's a wonderful birth story, thank you so much for sharing!

I can't believe you went shopping while you were having contractions! And way to go on saying exactly what you needed during your birth experience. I am always heartened to hear women standing up for themselves in the L&D - a woman after my own heart!

And lastly Annabelle is stunningly gorgeously beautiful !

 

Wow - congratulations! you are one tough Mama and I'm so glad that you plans worked out! Have fun at home

 

Awesome birth story! Congrats on your baby girl! :wub: She''s adorable!

 

Great birth story! Annabelle is beautiful and I am glad you are okay, Momma!

 

Yay Michelle! Awesome story & thank you for sharing. I'm so glad hypnobabies worked so well for you. I've heard many good things about it.

Annabelle is beautiful. :wub:

 

I think you misspelled her first name. Awesome birth story!!!! Way to go! She's beautiful! :wub:

How are the bg brothers doing?

 

Great birth story Michelle! Thanks for sharing! We're so happy you got the birth you wanted, I am just sorry recovery was not ideal, glad you are okay!! Annabelle is beautiful. :wub:

 

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!, what an awesome birth story!!! miss A is absolutely beautiful!!!!!!

 

Congratulations on a beautiful little girl and I hope you have recovered! Thank you for sharing that amazing birth story.

 

Well done! It sounds like you had an amazing team in place and exactly the birth experience you wanted.. which is amazing! I am sorry the recovery sucked, but you can't have everything I guess.. just glad you're ok. Annabelle is beautiful!

 

Congratulations! She is beautiful! Amazing, amazing birth story!

 

Congratulations Michelle!! She is beautiful! :wub:

 

Wonderful birth story!!! I went shopping and running errands on the day that I went into labor with Evan! When else was I going to get that done? Ha! Beautiful girl!

 

Wow what a story!! Sounds like you have an AMAZING hospital/birth team available also- you are so lucky!! Your little girl is gorgeous, enjoy!!

 

Wow, your birth story is impressive, you are so BRAVE . She is so cute and so big . Congratulations!!!

 

Thanks for sharing! And congratulations once again! Wow you're one tough cookie, glad everything turned out okay though :hug: She's absolutely GORGEOUS Michelle and I love the name you chose :wub:

The hypnobabies sound great, my contractions definitely didn't feel like hugs, lol. If I'm ever privileged enough to have another one I'll certainly look into that!

 

Wow! What a great birthing story! congratulations!!!!