my freakin MIL

So after getting discharged from the hospital again yesterday and told to be on modified bedrest in front of my MIL who had to pick me up, she already manages to let me down.
I got up this morning and got my son ready for school and laid back down to rest cause I was slightly contracting already and my MIL was supposed to come and pick him up to drop hime off at school. Mind you we live in a very small town and she lives just blocks away. Well I noticed I missed calls from here so I call her back. I guess she went out and partied too hard and was too hungover to take my son to school. So I had to rush to get dressed and get my son to school on time as I'm all huge and having to drive dh's standard mustang which is hard for me now and makes me go into contractions.
I'm really annoyed with her now. I wish sooo bad that my mom could be here for me. She would never have done something like this and would've made me stay my butt in bed. On top of it my MIL promised to come over and make some breakfast for me since we don't have much here right now and I can't go shop. Well I had to settle for a small bowl of cereal and a banana.
I kinda feel like I'm being a brat but I just don't want anything to put me back in the hospital after I've been in there 3 times since last Friday. I almost wish I could be on hospital bedrest so I'd be forced to rest and not keep pushing myself, but our hospital is too small for that.

Sorry, I really needed to get this out. I've had so much crap happen to me in the last week and no one to talk to about it.

 

I am so sorry you are having to deal with all of this. Could DH talk to her since it is his mother?

 

I am so sorry you are having to go thru that. Did the doctors orders go in one ear and out the other of you MIL?? I was a little taken back about you said about her partying. She shouldn't be out doing that with you in the condition that you are in. She needs to be ready any moment just incase you need her to take you to the hospital if you husband is unavailable. Seems like she made some promises she just isn't prepared to keep. Have you tried talking to her this morning about how you feel? Do you have friends near by. I am praying for you and hope you can get some rest so you can cook those babies longer.

 

I would not want to have to depend on her. Is there ANYONE else that can help out? Friends, family anyone from church or co workers? I would have to ask anyone but her. Her actions are unacceptable. The longer you keep these babies in the less time they will have to spend in the NICU. You need to take it at easy as possilbe and let people help you as much as they can.

Good luck to you!

 

MIL's can be such pains sometimes! Hopefully she will get her act together and if not, like the other ladies said, have your Dh talk to her, it is his Mother after all! Good luck!!

 

Kimani, you don't sound like a brat at all! :hug: The doctor told you to be on modified bedrest and your MIL should do what she says she will. :hug: I hope that your hubby can have a talk with her.

 

Well I have HER mom, dh's grandmother, who actually just woke me from my nap and apologized for her daughter. I feel bad asking her for much cause she is so old and her husband is a mean old man who doesn't like her to give anyone else attn.
I moved here in March and got pregnant. I don't hardly know anyone in this town other than dh's family. Its depressing at times.
My MIL has always been a wild one and likes to drink and whatnot. She came over stubbling one night last week and we had to take care of her. It just bugs that she knew she had just one responsibility to do and couldn't call it a night to get my son to school at 8am or pick him up at 3pm. Now her mom has to get him. Is it that hard not to get wasted with friends on a week night?!

 

QUOTE(Kimani @ Oct 16 2008, 10:13 AM) [snapback]1028744[/snapback]
She came over stubbling one night last week and we had to take care of her.


So sorry. That does not sound like someone I would let drive my kids to school! Can you call the school to see if anyone from that school lives near you that could help you out?

 

How old is she like 50? She has responsibilitys other then partying.

Is there anyone in your family that can come stay with you for awhile? Any siblings or your mom, for a little while? Or anyone at a church that is close to you?

 

This is not normal.

You need to talk to your husband about your MIL. If she is going to agree to help you and drive your kids to school, then she shouldn't be out partying and getting too sick to take them. How irresponsible. And I can't believe she would put your twin pregnancy in jeapordy by making you get out of bed to do what she agreed to do!

I would fire her, she sounds like a terrible influece to have around your children. Isn't there someone else who can help you? A neighbor? One of your child's friends' parents?

 

I really only know like 6 or 7 people in this town, all of who work other than my MIL and her mother. We don't go to church so that's out.

I didn't know that she was like this. She is about 50, just got over breast cancer and I guess just wants to make up for being sick. In all honesty this is just a redneck town full of oil drillers and whatnot. Everyone smokes, drinks, and cusses up a storm. I was raised very different. Dh and I had a long distance relationship at first and he would come up and visit. I really didn't know what I was getting myself into. I love him very much and his family for the most part. Its ackward to put my foot down on all these things like smoking round my son and her cussing all the time around him.

My mom is a full time special ed teacher and director at her school and can only take off time when I have the babies. I miss her so bad and really didn't know how much I needed her.

 

Oh gosh, your MIL sounds like one hell of a wild woman, and I'd be very worried if my 5 yr old son is taken care of by her. I'm sorry to hear that you're in such a predicament, but I think your grand-MIL is your best bet at the moment. Suppose the other option is to have your son stop school for a couple of days? Not the best option I know, but at least he's around you and you know he's safe.

Or, can you move over to your mum?

 

Well she appologized for flaking on me earlier. Bottomline is that she's all I really have. I'm not allowed to travel 5 hours to my mom at all. Taking my son out of school is out. He's at the top of his class and loves school, he gets mad at me on weekends for not taking him to school sometimes. My Noah is actually getting an award tomorrow at school. So here's my new predictament: do I go to his school for his very first award ceremony?
I can't bare thinking of my son getting an award and me not being there taking pictures and him having someone in the crowd for him. I'm probably going to end up going and sitting down the whole time and then coming home right after and then staying in bed the whole weekend.

 

:hug: If you feel you need to be there for your sons award it might be worth the effort, relax as much as you can and take care of yourself as best you can and make sure your DH does everything for you when he is home sorry about your MIL!

 

Does the school have a nurse? If so, I would call her and alert her to your plans on being there. She might be able to arrange at least a wheelchair for you. If there isn't a nurse, I would AT LEAST let the principal/office staff know that you are officially on bedrest due to a twin pregnancy. They could at LEAST arrange for you to be able to sit as close to the door or something so you walk a lot less.

Good luck. Sounds like you have it rough. Pregnancy doesn't last forever....

Dominique

 

Unbelievable! Sounds like your MIL doesn't care about her impending grandchildren, and the impact HER actions have on you and her grandbabies. I would have a serious talk with hubby, forget relying on her, and ask some friends for help. Explain the situation to a friend or two, and I'm sure they may be willing to help.

When I was on strict bedrest, my hubby set up a dresser with food & snacks next to the bed, a microwave on top, and a cooler he packed every morning with frozen dinners, juices, a even milk for cereal. It worked for our situation. Of course, we don't have any other children, and honestly I can't imagine having other kids, being preggo with twins & on bedrest! Kudos to you and other moms who do it.. you are amazing!

Good luck!