My almost 3y.o. will not sleep through the night...HELP!

Ok,something is wrong here. My babies sleep through the night with no problems, but my DS (almost 3) wakes up 1-2x EVERY NIGHT---- it's getting old and I'm getting very frustrated with him. I started giving him a small sippie of water to take to bed with him and that helped for a while, but now he's waking up for either "I want milk"----escalating louder and louder until either he wakes up the rest of the kids or I give in and give it to him :angry: or else he's soaked through his PJ's. I know I have to stop this vicious cycle,but this boy has a temper and he's stubborn. I cannot keep waking up with him every night either though. It's also making him very grouchy and even more demanding during the day. I try to ignore his behaviors in the daytime,but it doesn't seem to help. He throws tantrums, throws toys, hits his siblings, hits me. He will not stay in time out. If I try the 1-2-3 method, he finishes the count for me and starts laughing. What else can I do????? I need some suggestions and all of your expertise before I lose it

Crystal

 

I think it is probably time to get tough. If he is wetting through, then I wouldn't give him anything to drink anyway--he doesn't need it and he is definately using it to manipulate you. One thing we did with our boys was to give them a digital clock. They are not allowed out until 7, and it didn't take them long to get that--that way you aren't being mean by not letting him out--the clock is controlling it. He has figured out that if he screams loud and long enough, he will get what he wants. I think you need to totally ignore him for a night or two, and he will get the picture--it will be hard and get worse before it gets better, but soooo worth it in the long run.

 

I know you're right. I just feel horrible withholding fluids from him. Just keep reminding me that he's going to be ok. He's always been an early riser and lite sleeper to begin with. I know I'm going to have to be tough with him. What do you think about his demands during the day? It should be a fun few nights of ignoring him----if no one comes to the door, he lays in front of it and kicks it!

Crystal

 

Ok here goes my girls just started sleeping thru the night about a month ago (and its still not every night). they are 4

I just finally became more firm and said u have to sleep in ur own bed and now I just put them back in their bed and they usually go to sleep. The 1st couple they cried a little (mind u mine are older than yours), Its so hard too when they are so loud, which one of mine woz coz then they wake up the other twin.

How do you put them down at night, do u just put them in bed or lie with them. We used to lie with them and I think this added to the problem as when they woke they needed us then to get them back to sleep. So we now put them into bed and sit in the hallway, hopefully we'll get out of this soon.

I think if they wake and want a drink I would but maybe say just 2 sips or whatever u choose or else the drink will become an extra battle too.

I know I've probably not helped, but I do sympathize I know wot its like to go without sleep, both of mine were like this and I would be getting woke up sometimes 6 times a night (3 times each)

Good luck to you and hopefully its sorted soon


amanda

 

Honestly, I think if you get the nighttime settled, the behavior during the day will improve as well. Fight one battle first. If he does have behavior issues, I would give him one warning, and then a time out in another room--we always used the steps. As for limiting fluids, from the time we stopped bottles at 11 1/2 months, mine never got a drink at bedtime unless they specifically asked, and then it was a sip--we never left a drink in their room. This was mostly because I knew we would have to limit when we started potty training, and I didn't want to start a habit I would later have to break.

Good luck!

 

That's a tough one! I know I would be afraid of him waking the whole house up too and want to end the battle quickly so everyone could go back to sleep. However, usually when I get stubborn and stand tough is when the situation starts to get worse and cause more problems. Sounds like you are already there and ready to do this...so I guess you'll have to do what everyone suggested and no means no. I do like the clock idea. I don't have one in their room but I've always used it for nap and bedtime. It's never my fault that it's 1 OH OH (1:00) or 8: OH OH (8:00). I'm sure he won't buy it at first but if you keep pointing to the clock and saying it's still night time until 7: OH OH (7:00) it might help.

I do usually find that the supernanny method of little to no communication and no eye contact works best for my boys. I just lie them back down and walk out the door so that might not be consistent with pointing to a clock and saying it's not 7. However, if that's all you say every time it might be okay.

Good luck, I know it sucks to have to hear your little guy cry. However, if you resolve this he'll be more well rested and probably a different kid during the day. I know that's how I was able to do it. I knew Michael's night waking was making him miserable during the day so I figured it was worth a week of horrible screaming and my horrible guilt. I wasn't sure if I was being selfish and wanted the sleep, but I knew it wasn't true. I had to keep reminding myself it was for his benefit and it really was.

 

My DD wakes up everyonce in a while but now will not leave her room unless its light outside. I dont give her any thing to drink about an hour b4 bed and i make her use the potty ( I dont know if your boy is potty trained or not)
DD would come in to our room but i would just explain to her why she cant sleep in our room/bed anymore.. When it would happen again i would take her into her room without talking to her at all... Nanny 911 trick.. Watch Super nanny or nanny 911.. They have a lot of bed time tricks!! They really work!!!!! DD slept in bed with me until she was 3.5 (May 07). Thats when DH and i moved in together..

 

Oh, those little boys in the terrible twos/threes! What a total challenge they can be. Parents are lucky to survive these times. You've gotten lots of advice about bedtime-do what you think will work. Be prepared that he probably will scream, and probably will wake everyone, so do it on a night when you can get rest somehow or have less to do the next day (a Friday, or whenever).

And for the day behavior, if you are serious about wanting to stop it, you need to pick a time you are set to be firm, and then go cold turkey on changing it. No warnings, just consequences everytime he misbehaves. If you have to hold him in time out, that's OK. Don't let him up until he is calm, appologizes, and acknowledges what he did wrong. Even if it's you saying "is it OK to hit?" He needs to say no and appologize. It may seem like it's escalating at first, they get desperate and really push buttons, but then he'll get it and you'll soon forget the struggle to tame the shrew (but not the spirit). We're here for you, vent your way through this. Good luck.

 

I think you have gotten some great advice. I totally agree that you just need to take a stand and be firm. It will be really rough for a few nights, but I think it will pay off in the end. We usually cut off liquids at dinner time, that has really helped with wetting through diapers at night.

Ryan is really stubborn as well and I also have a hard time disciplining him. I do 1-2-3 magic and it is really hard to get him to stay in his time out spot. I did TO the other day for 1.5 hours. He kept laughing at me and running away. By the end he was hysterical crying, but at least he stayed in his TO spot and I have noticed a little bit of improvement since then. I think now he really takes me seriously that when I mean TO he needs to stay. But it certainly tests every ounce of my patience. I really feel for you, since you have 3 other little ones to take care of as well.

 

Oh how I can relate! Kaylee will usually go to bed with a cup of milk. Yes I know bad habit, but it works. Kelby throws a fit if I leave and cries so hard until he pukes. We have to lay with him. When DH lays with them Kaylee will stay in her bed, but when I am in there she climbs into bed with Kelby and I. Tonight I tried something and I think it worked. I opened there door and moved the Lazy-boy in so they can see it from their room and told them that is where I will be sitting. So far so good.

I don't know what to tell you because I am in the same boat. Kelby will come and climb into bed with us and sometimes he is so quite I don't hear him. I always move him back, but he ends up there. Kaylee is up 2-3 times per night. I give her less than 1/4 cup of milk and that works. I just don't know how I will end the milk at night. I am sorry I am no help, but I would suggest standing firm and not letting him get his way.

Let me ask you this...has anyone else ever put him to bed like a babysitter. I know I am being played because the babysitter was here on Sat night and she said she just put them in there and they went right to sleep. They do fine for everyone else, but not for us.