Mine, mine, mine, mine,mine ...

It is really getting crazy over here with the boys claiming everything as "mine". I know that this is a work in progress but are there any tips out there as to how to teach them to share and that it's ours and not mine. I'm trying to teach them that each boy can have a turn and that they get a certain amount of time with that toy but that only works few and far between. It's usually the one boy w/o the toy sits and screams that it's "mine" over and over and over.

Since I really can't :headbang:, let me just add it here a few times. :headbang: :headbang: :headbang: Oh and a little :catfight: . Thanks!


The weather needs to cooperate better so I can get everyone outside!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

I'm right there with ya! On top of a grumpy farmer DH who can't get in the fields and plant bc of non stop rain here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I also hear, "hannah, Hannah, HANNAH! MINE", "Your too little", "No", "*various screaming and squawking noises*"!

Its unbearable some days! Today being one of them! They've been cooped up far too long and to top it off they woke up early today and wouldn't lay down for their nap until almost 20 mins ago...they are usually waking up right now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So "share" and let me "take a turn" on that wall with you :headbang:

 

Our daycare started enforcing taking turns around 18 months (much earlier than I would have thought to do it) and I'm so grateful that they did! It takes a few thousand repetitions of "Now it's your turn -- in one minute it will be her turn" before they start doing it on their own (and they still have trouble with it at age 5!). But the more practice they get, the more they will accept it. We did always have to enforce it though, including literally prying one kid's fingers off the thing when it's the other kid's turn. Setting a timer also helps -- it makes it seem less personal and more like a Law of the Universe.

 

I agree you just have to keep up with enforcing turns. A timer can work really well to help them get the idea. I was constantly telling them "It's not yours, it's a sharing one. X is having a turn and then it's your turn next." As they got older (like 3+) I started to work on getting them to ask each other "please can I have a turn", telling the one who had the item to give it to their twin when they had finished.

The other thing that I found helped is to let them have some things that do belong to each of them individually. I think sometimes (and especially with twins) we expect them to share everything. The majority of their toys are joint (at that age probably 95% were shared) but there are some things that are individual. That doesn't mean they never shared their 'special' toys with each other but they didn't have to, it was their choice. For us having those few things they could claim total ownership of made it easier for them to share the rest of the stuff.
That's also why, for things we had doubles of, I always liked having them in different colours/designs rather than exactly the same. Each child could have their own one and if an argument came up about who was playing with it I could say "That's x's ball/car/teddy, go and find your one."

I hope you can get outside soon!

 

Listen to yourself and see how many times you or your significant other says mine. We took it out of our vocabulary and they don't say it much even now

 

Agree with PP - we started giving a few things to the boys that were just their own so they didn’t have to share everything thing. Also if they are BOTH fighting over something and can’t reasonably work it out then neither of them can play with it.

 

My one son was receiving OT through EI right around the age of 2 and I had no choice but to include my other DS in his sessions. The therapist started us on taking turns and now at 3 I hear them both playing with something and then say it's his brother's turn. Just yesterday my one DS was sitting with me playing with a toy and kept saying "mommy's turn" and then "my turn".

I also have told them at least a million times that they need to share and I can honestly say it's finally sinking in.

 

That is what we do with all 5 of our kids. Luckily with the girls, Ava loves baby dolls and anything girly and Addison wants NO part of any of that so their special things are from 2 different aisles of the store LOL! My older boys are actually my biggest problem believe it or not! With their x box controllers, ESP!! we were having the that's mine crap with 17, 14 and 12 yr olds it was so fun let me tell you. UHG!!!!!! So I took them all away and made them use their money and buy their own controllers so that they would truly be theirs ( the x box is MINE LOL!! So I reserve the Play right at all times LOL!)