Might Miss The Birth...

So, I recently got back from Iraq Jan 27th. We had discussed while I was gone that maybe we should give trying to get pregnant a shot. Well, guess it didn't take long, because after a few weeks of being back, she was pregnant. We sure didn't expect it to be so soon, espicially since she had always been on a constant birth control pill until October to help ease painful cycles...

Then we went to the first Dr.'s appointment last month when she was 8 weeks along, and BLAMMO...twins.

We discussed it, and thought it was best for me to go back to Iraq (4 month tours) while she was pregnant, instead of leaving around December when she had a newborn (this is when we thought there was only one), but now, the last thing I want to do is leave her in December with (2) 2 month-olds.

The problem is, we send people over there every 2 months and the soonest I could get back over there was June-Oct. Now that would have been great for just one child (Due Nov 10th), because I would be back like the 3rd week of October, but now since it is twins, she is due Oct 23rd. That is RIGHT when I am supposed to be back. I know term for twins is 37 weeks. What are the thoughts, chances of her making it to term? This will be our first child(s). They normally don't keep them much past term (37 weeks) do they?

 

first off congratulations!! The only thing I would be concerned with is that along with twins having a higher chance of being preemies a lot of complications and issues CAN not saying they will be can happen.There could be a possiblity of bed rest,hospital stays etc.Will she have help while your gone?My husband worked on the road welding for months at a time and in October I was put on bed rest due to early contractions and dilating.My husband decided to stay home with me and help around the house and take me to Doctors appointments(at the end after put on bed rest I was going weekly)It was a blessing for him to be here because like he said if he weren't home there was a good chance I wouldn't have made it much longer without having the babies.I ended up making it to 36 weeks 5 days(being induced after contractions stopped the night before)But like you will read on here there is a lot of people who make it to 36-38 weeks and beyond without any trouble and some that are in the hospital on bedrest from 23 weeks and beyond.Its a tough call.I would discuss it with your ob or peri and see what they think is best and if you do decide to go make sure she has plenty of help lined up.Plus having twins is in NO WAY a one person job.

 

Every pregnancy is different and some doctors are comfortable letting twin moms-to-be go later. Talk to your doctor about what his/her thoughts are on how late she should go.

Is there a way you could come back a little earlier?

 

QUOTE(Chloe_and_Leahs_mommy @ May 3 2009, 08:13 PM) [snapback]1298840[/snapback]
first off congratulations!! The only thing I would be concerned with is that along with twins having a higher chance of being preemies a lot of complications and issues CAN not saying they will be can happen.There could be a possiblity of bed rest,hospital stays etc.Will she have help while your gone?My husband worked on the road welding for months at a time and in October I was put on bed rest due to early contractions and dilating.My husband decided to stay home with me and help around the house and take me to Doctors appointments(at the end after put on bed rest I was going weekly)It was a blessing for him to be here because like he said if he weren't home there was a good chance I wouldn't have made it much longer without having the babies.I ended up making it to 36 weeks 5 days(being induced after contractions stopped the night before)But like you will read on here there is a lot of people who make it to 36-38 weeks and beyond without any trouble and some that are in the hospital on bedrest from 23 weeks and beyond.Its a tough call.I would discuss it with your ob or peri and see what they think is best and if you do decide to go make sure she has plenty of help lined up.Plus having twins is in NO WAY a one person job.


Yeah, that is what I like about her Dr. He is very straight forward. "Not that this WILL happen, but it CAN". He has 2 13 yr old twins boys that wieghed 8lbs at birth!!!

Yes, her family is a few miles up the road, the next town over.

I was reading a bit about the other people on here that made it a bit past 37 weeks, so that is sort of refreshing.

I pretty much don't have a choice. When Uncle Sam tells me to go...I have to go. Like I said, I think it is much better for me to go now, than in Decemeber. I mean there would actually be a chance that if I did not go in June, that they could send me in October.

She will have a lot of family support while I am gone and the last thing I wanted to do was leave her with 2 newborns for 4 months right after they were born and head off to Iraq. There is a chance if she has to be on 100% bedrest that they would bring me back early, but no just for bedrest (meaning she can't work). It would have to be a serious bedrest situation.

I'm gonna have my fingers crossed.

 

QUOTE(gina_leigh @ May 3 2009, 08:14 PM) [snapback]1298842[/snapback]
Every pregnancy is different and some doctors are comfortable letting twin moms-to-be go later. Talk to your doctor about what his/her thoughts are on how late she should go.

Is there a way you could come back a little earlier?


Possibly...if she gets on 100% bedrest and needs someone full time to help care for her. The Dr. can always "fudge" a bit when requesting me to come home early.

I hope so. I know being healthy doesn't always mean she will keep them to term, or past term, but she is doing everything well. She is a health nut and loves the gym, so I can only hope to make it back in time.

 

Congratulations!!!

I had a very uneventful/normal pregnancy (it was our first too). I ended up carrying my girls to 37.5 weeks & had a scheduled c-section.

I would think that if your wife has a great support system with friends and family that are physically available to help her towards the end of her pregnancy as well as be there for her for at least the first month after the babies arrive she would be OK. Someone would defnitely need to be there with her at home after the babies arrive.

Sorry you may have to miss the birth, but a big thanks to you for what you do for our country! :hug:

 

QUOTE(tamaras @ May 3 2009, 08:29 PM) [snapback]1298854[/snapback]
Congratulations!!!

I had a very uneventful/normal pregnancy (it was our first too). I ended up carrying my girls to 37.5 weeks & had a scheduled c-section.

I would think that if your wife has a great support system with friends and family that are physically available to help her towards the end of her pregnancy as well as be there for her for at least the first month after the babies arrive she would be OK. Someone would defnitely need to be there with her at home after the babies arrive.

Sorry you may have to miss the birth, but a big thanks to you for what you do for our country! :hug:


Thanks...

Her start of her 37th week is exactly when I am due to return.

Yeah, she has a bunch of help. Also I have a roomie(until the twins come) that can do A LOT of things for her around the house while I am gone and things start to get difficult for her.

IF for some reason I do happen to miss the birth, she will hae her Mom or her Sister staying with her full-time, then when she goes back to work, I am taking a month off to care for them. I want to make sure they are a bit more durable before we put them in daycare a few days a week.

Missing the birth will suck, but I can guarentee I will be needed MUCH more after that birth than before

 

QUOTE
Yeah, that is what I like about her Dr. He is very straight forward. "Not that this WILL happen, but it CAN". He has 2 13 yr old twins boys that wieghed 8lbs at birth!!!

Yes, her family is a few miles up the road, the next town over.

I was reading a bit about the other people on here that made it a bit past 37 weeks, so that is sort of refreshing.

I pretty much don't have a choice. When Uncle Sam tells me to go...I have to go. Like I said, I think it is much better for me to go now, than in Decemeber. I mean there would actually be a chance that if I did not go in June, that they could send me in October.

She will have a lot of family support while I am gone and the last thing I wanted to do was leave her with 2 newborns for 4 months right after they were born and head off to Iraq. There is a chance if she has to be on 100% bedrest that they would bring me back early, but no just for bedrest (meaning she can't work). It would have to be a serious bedrest situation.

I'm gonna have my fingers crossed.

its great she will have family close by.Sounds like she would have a great support system.You never know if could be a wonderful uneventful pregnancy.Hopefully you'll be able to get back in time for the birth.Is your wife a member here?If not she should join.Im sure she'll be full of questions and the expert twin mommies here are great help or even company.Good Luck!!!

 

QUOTE(Pitbullzz @ May 3 2009, 06:34 PM) [snapback]1298866[/snapback]
Thanks...

Her start of her 37th week is exactly when I am due to return.

Yeah, she has a bunch of help. Also I have a roomie(until the twins come) that can do A LOT of things for her around the house while I am gone and things start to get difficult for her.

IF for some reason I do happen to miss the birth, she will hae her Mom or her Sister staying with her full-time, then when she goes back to work, I am taking a month off to care for them. I want to make sure they are a bit more durable before we put them in daycare a few days a week.

Missing the birth will suck, but I can guarentee I will be needed MUCH more after that birth than before


Sounds like you guys have a lot of help & options which is GREAT!
She won't be alone & that would be the main worry ~

Just tell her to take it easy the further along she gets - lots of rest & LOTS of water is key! Hopefully those babies will wait to arrive till their dad gets home!!

 

Oh I was going to mention if you did happen to miss it you could always have someone video tape the labor/delivery or c-section from the beginning and videotape her belly for you for the months you are gone.I know it would be sad to miss but it all happens so quickly once you get in there to be honest I don't even remember everything,I wish I had taped it.Then you would always have that to remember it.If she get closer and the Dr thinks there is no sign labor is happening soon and the babies are fine maybe she can plan an induction or c-section for after you have arrived and settled a little.

 

QUOTE(Chloe_and_Leahs_mommy @ May 3 2009, 08:40 PM) [snapback]1298873[/snapback]
Oh I was going to mention if you did happen to miss it you could always have someone video tape the labor/delivery or c-section from the beginning and videotape her belly for you for the months you are gone.I know it would be sad to miss but it all happens so quickly once you get in there to be honest I don't even remember everything,I wish I had taped it.Then you would always have that to remember it.If she get closer and the Dr thinks there is no sign labor is happening soon and the babies are fine maybe she can plan an induction or c-section for after you have arrd and settled a little.


Yeah...I will have the tripod and video camera ready for her. No close ups(Ha)...just set up in the room.

That would be the ideal situation. I could care less if I was just walking off the plane. I would head straight to the hospital if need be.

I usually know the exact date I will be home about 3 weeks out, so if she does make it to term and there is no sign of labor...that would be great to have a date set where I could be there

 

QUOTE(Chloe_and_Leahs_mommy @ May 3 2009, 08:36 PM) [snapback]1298869[/snapback]
its great she will have family close by.Sounds like she would have a great support system.You never know if could be a wonderful uneventful pregnancy.Hopefully you'll be able to get back in time for the birth.Is your wife a member here?If not she should join.Im sure she'll be full of questions and the expert twin mommies here are great help or even company.Good Luck!!!


She isn't yet, but I am pretty sure she will be soon. With her work schedule, it is hard to get on at work and after she gets home, gym time, etc. She is pooped and ready for bed. I guess I just ask questions for the both of us now.

 

Congratulations!! and :welcome: to TS!

It's wonderful your wife will have so much help and support while you are gone. I hope the babies can hold out until you get back!! I had an uneventful pregnancy and my water broke at 37w0d.

I'm sorry you have to miss most of the pregnancy. Thank you! for your service though!!!

 

Thanks...and only 7 more years of this service and going off for months at a time, then I am retired and will become a stay home dad...can't wait.

 

Congrats to you two! I agree that leaving when you are is probably smarter than december. My DH was deployed for over a year right after we found out we were having our DD. My OB was really awesome through everything, and when i had complications he redcrossed my dh home and he got to be there to see her born and went back a week later. Once the redcross message went through, he was on an airplane in less than 24 hours. I'll admit it was rough being prego while he was gone, but i think the first few months after she was born was rougher (he came back to a 5 month old baby). My heart goes out to you two with you having to leave during this time and i know how it feels. You and your wife can feel free to pm me anytime. Take care!

 

QUOTE(agentplatypus @ May 3 2009, 11:07 PM) [snapback]1299022[/snapback]
Congrats to you two! I agree that leaving when you are is probably smarter than december. My DH was deployed for over a year right after we found out we were having our DD. My OB was really awesome through everything, and when i had complications he redcrossed my dh home and he got to be there to see her born and went back a week later. Once the redcross message went through, he was on an airplane in less than 24 hours. I'll admit it was rough being prego while he was gone, but i think the first few months after she was born was rougher (he came back to a 5 month old baby). My heart goes out to you two with you having to leave during this time and i know how it feels. You and your wife can feel free to pm me anytime. Take care!


Thanks. Yeah, that Red Cross works fast. If I do have to come back, I hope she can make it as far long as possible.

 

Yes, thank you for what you are doing for our country and it's obvious you want to be there... God bless.

 

What branch of the service are you in? My DH was able to miss a 2 month deployment b/c they thought my boys might have TTTS (only happens when there is one placenta) and I could possibly deliver at 29 weeks. The AF was great and kept him home. In his squadron, ALL the new daddies deploy for 2 months exactly 2 months after their baby (ies) are born. I was alone for 80 days (of course his 2 month got extended a few weeks) when the boys had only been home for 1 month b/c they spent their first month in the NICU. I packed us all into the car after 1 month alone and drove to my parents house 9 hrs away. Is your wife independent? Does she have any previous experience with babies? It was really tough, but I did it and was glad that the boys were young enough not to know that they were missing their daddy.

FYI for your next deployment, you can videotape yourself reading stories so your babies can watch you and listen to your voice while you are away. Every night we would watch my DH. You can even go to a military base library and record more while you are away. Also, check out http://www.hugahero.com/ for a Daddy Doll.

 

QUOTE(mommymeg @ May 4 2009, 12:55 PM) [snapback]1299821[/snapback]
What branch of the service are you in? My DH was able to miss a 2 month deployment b/c they thought my boys might have TTTS (only happens when there is one placenta) and I could possibly deliver at 29 weeks. The AF was great and kept him home. In his squadron, ALL the new daddies deploy for 2 months exactly 2 months after their baby (ies) are born. I was alone for 80 days (of course his 2 month got extended a few weeks) when the boys had only been home for 1 month b/c they spent their first month in the NICU. I packed us all into the car after 1 month alone and drove to my parents house 9 hrs away. Is your wife independent? Does she have any previous experience with babies? It was really tough, but I did it and was glad that the boys were young enough not to know that they were missing their daddy.

FYI for your next deployment, you can videotape yourself reading stories so your babies can watch you and listen to your voice while you are away. Every night we would watch my DH. You can even go to a military base library and record more while you are away. Also, check out http://www.hugahero.com/ for a Daddy Doll.


I'm in the AF.

No, you are correct, I "could" be home for the birth, but then I would have to go back in December no matter what (for 4 months). Now, I can make it home right at their birth, or very soon after and be home for at least 8 months. I came back the end of Jan, so December would be the latest they could keep me home. We had to choose what would be best for us, and leaving her for 4 months when the kids would possibly a month old was a no-brainer.

If she has some serious medical issues, I could be brought back early...if not...I will ba back right at her 37th month.

Yeah, she work for State Farm and will have her own agency in the next year and a half, but she does have all of her family in the local area (20 min away).

She raised her little sister and took care of her a lot growing up. I got her beat by a little bit. My Mom did home daycare for 15 years while I was in the house and no runs a 12 child home daycare. We are always going to run into new things with these kids, but at least I wont be like my brother-in-law watching him try to put his first kid in a car seat for about 45 minutes thinking she was made out of thin pastry dough. I was like "come on man...she isn't going to break into a 1,000 pieces"

Thanks for the link...that's a good idea


oh...and probably WAY stupid of a question, but what does "DH" mean

 

QUOTE(Pitbullzz @ May 6 2009, 04:10 PM) [snapback]1303388[/snapback]
oh...and probably WAY stupid of a question, but what does "DH" mean



DH = Dear Husband

 

QUOTE(fromthecabbagepatch @ May 6 2009, 04:14 PM) [snapback]1303391[/snapback]
DH = Dear Husband


Got it. Just making sure it wasn't Dumb Husband, but then I would have just proven that by not knowing what it was...ha.

Dear Husband...LOL...I'm sure those words don't come out much during childbirth...