Just wanting some opinions

Hi all! Just wanting to gather some opinions here... Last week my boys turned 2 and a good friend of mine at work was asking what my feelings were about those backpack leash things, because she was thinking about getting them for the boys. She had bought one for her niece around age 2 who is now 5 and said that her niece loved it! Before we had the boys, I was always kinda against ever getting them for any child, but when my co-worker asked me, I started thinking about how they would be more of a kind of safety thing given my boys very independent attitudes. They will walk holding my hands for only a short period of time, but then like to run off. And if we put them in their strollers, they are almost immediately squirming to get out. I know they used to make those as just a straight harness type thing, but now that they have the ones that are attached to little animal backpacks, it doesn't seem quite so bad.
Before I just told my co-worker to go ahead and get them, I told her I wanted to discuss it w/my husband first, b/c I knew his original opinion was the same as mine. However, my husband says he doesn't like them and won't give me any specific reasons aside to say that he just thinks they are degrading. But he says that the choice is mine what I tell my co-worker.

So, has anyone else here ever gotten them, and what are your takes on them? Thank you for the input!

 

QUOTE(Laurenbelle @ Mar 6 2009, 08:42 PM) [snapback]1217565[/snapback]
Hi all! Just wanting to gather some opinions here... Last week my boys turned 2 and a good friend of mine at work was asking what my feelings were about those backpack leash things, because she was thinking about getting them for the boys. She had bought one for her niece around age 2 who is now 5 and said that her niece loved it! Before we had the boys, I was always kinda against ever getting them for any child, but when my co-worker asked me, I started thinking about how they would be more of a kind of safety thing given my boys very independent attitudes. They will walk holding my hands for only a short period of time, but then like to run off. And if we put them in their strollers, they are almost immediately squirming to get out. I know they used to make those as just a straight harness type thing, but now that they have the ones that are attached to little animal backpacks, it doesn't seem quite so bad.
Before I just told my co-worker to go ahead and get them, I told her I wanted to discuss it w/my husband first, b/c I knew his original opinion was the same as mine. However, my husband says he doesn't like them and won't give me any specific reasons aside to say that he just thinks they are degrading. But he says that the choice is mine what I tell my co-worker.

So, has anyone else here ever gotten them, and what are your takes on them? Thank you for the input!


Ya know...I asked this a few weeks ago! Well-more of how to contain them. Anyways...I went out to Target and got the backpack harnesses. They are from Eddie Bauer and they are actually cute-I got the dog and monkey one. My boys are 16 months old...so a bit younger...and they did NOT get the concept! LOL! Plus-it was only me using it-and with the two of them in two different directions...ya...not a pretty sight! LOL! But-your boys are older-so it could work.

I felt bad as well-in terms of what society would think of me putting "leashes" on my kids. But I have to stop and think it's their safety. And if someone else had twins/multiples-they might be doing the same thing as us.

 

We have them and the girls love them. It's so much better than getting out the double stroller for short distances. The girls look SO CUTE with them on. No one can resist them with the backpacks on.

 

You know, I was always totally against those leashes whenever I seen a child with one on. I just always had the imprint in my head of that being a use for a dog ONLY & how cruel it is to contain a child in one. Now that I have twins (who aren't walking yet) I could probably see the use for them now. I mean, nothing would be more hectic that chasing two boys in two different directions I can imagine. I don't know if I would personally use them, as I am not in a situation where I would consider it yet, but safety is DEF first!

 

I got them at my baby shower and said I would never use them until one day last summer we went to a park on a lake by myself, so I got the things out so I would have control of the boys and not have to worry about the lake.
There were a million other moms/kids there and I felt really weird about it pretty much the whole time just b/c I know how people think of them. We already get stared at and it was worse having them in the harness!! It was sort of hard b/c they were both going in different directions, however...it was better then running after both of them the whole time so I say who cares!!! It is a safty issue and I think that is all that matters. I would go for it!

 

I am a HUGE fan of any kind of tether for a headstrong toddler (or two!). I am terrified of someone abducting one of my children (anybody seen those mom's who just let their toddlers roam at Target or wherever???? That blows my mind!) That has never been, nor will ever be me. I'll take the funny looks any day over the panic of not being able to find my child, or having one run off while I've got the other two... For the most part, people have always been nice about the tethers.

To quote my mother (who had ME on a tether because I was evidently He!! on wheels 35 years ago), "Fine. I'll take it off. You chase her. You are not allowed to quit, or call mall security to help you grab her unless her life is in danger. I'll know where you are by the loud noises and crashes, you'll be able to find me by the hysterical laughter you'll hear floating behind you..."

 

Our boys LOVE theirs! They seriously wear them around the house every. single. day. There are times while out and about it gets a little difficult if they want to go another direction, but it doesn't take long before they figure it out. I was never a fan of them before having kids, but man, I am a huge advocate of them now! I mean seriously, with all the crazies out there, with all the possible chances for them to run off in two different directions... keeping them "leashed" means keeping them safe, and like everyone already said, that is what's most important! And FWIW, I think every time this topic comes up on these boards, I think I'm safe in saying the vast majority of moms are PRO harnesses!

 

My husband absolutely fought against the idea. I thought it was a neat idea, he said, "no way we're putting our girls on a leash." Our girls, however, are fairly compliant when we go places and we didn't need them. They loved their stroller and when they were big enough to walk they held our hands well. For kids who don't love the stroller and don't hold hands well, I could see where they would be a nice alternative. So, I didn't agree with my husband, but he did win in the end <_<

 

I used them with both my sets, and not cute little backpack ones either, just the normal harnesses. It does take some practice to use them because they need to lean that they have to walk in the same direction at pretty much the same speed. It probably took 3 or 4 goes for them to get used to it.
I also had the wrist link ones which I used with N & L because they didn't like holding hands-they would walk beside me ok but on narrower pavments it's just a couple of steps into the road and I wasn't comfortable with that. They really liked those ones (and they didn't need to practice) because I was wearing one to, they'd ask "Have you got yours on Zoë?" "I got one and you got two".

I think there may be a slightly different attitude to harnesses here (UK), I never felt like I was being judged and I never got any comments on using them. Honestly I was surprised the first time I read on here that people take issue with them. My opinion is that they are a safety device and a good thing for lots of people. I look at it as the same sort of thing as strapping a toddler into a stroller; yes they can sit in the stroller without straps, and they might not jump out/fall out-you could even argue that parents should just teach their children to sit nicely and it's cruel to restrain them-but why risk it when the straps are there?

[SIZE=8pt]ETA: If you're interested in the wrist link ones you can get them on Amazon[/SIZE]

 

I dont know how I would get through the day with out my harnesses we took the twins to toysrus and let them pick the style they wanted DD got a pink poodle and DS got a teddy bear. Now when we go to take our eldest DS to school in the morning they get their little animals and put on their hats its a great routine. I dont take them if my DH is around as with another adult I dont need too, but when its just me i need to keep the kids at arms length! When our youngest DS turns 2 Ill get him one too ( i think Im going to look like a dog walker with 3 of them on leashes ) Im going to need it.

 

We had a conversation about this at work the other day when I told a story about taking the boys out on a walk with the harnesses for the first time and how hilarious/hard it was when they went in different directions or just refused to walk...A couple of people were aghast that I would put the kids on leashes, and it made me SO MAD. I defy anyone who thinks they're "wrong" to live day-to-day with a pair of active young toddlers who need regular exercise. They are such a great way to give the boys more time to walk and explore a little when I need to run errands instead of going to the park all morning...and how is being strapped into a stroller against their will better than a safety harness?

The thing is, you really don't get that unless you spend enough time alone with them to need to a) multitask with them in tow or b) give them a break from the stroller. Sorry. Sore subject. My respect for one of my colleagues was seriously undermined by his attitude.

 

There's nothing wrong with child harnesses, especially if you have twins. My mother used one on me. I bought one when I was pregnant and I still have to get one more. My babies just turned 1 so it will be a while before I use them...but I'm definitely going to use them !!
I remember seeing a woman using one on her son (only one child ) in a shopping mall when I was pregnant and I thought "She's a responsible parent who really cares about her child. "
Anyone who would be offended by them is nuts IMO.

 

my opinion is the same as yours and your DH's. I don't like them. I do understand why people use them, and certainly don't judge those who do. I think there are other ways of training your children to stay by you in public. You can PM me if you're interested in some of my ideas/suggestions. My advice to you in this situation is to listen to your husband's feeling on this and tell your coworker friend that you and your husband are in agreement on the leashes, that you feel you aren't ready to try that with your children, and that you don't want to go against your husband on this. The co worker shouldn't be offended with that line of thought.

 

Thank you all for the input. It was good to see what peoples experiences were that have actually used them. Like I said in my original post, I do see them more of a safety thing now, than I did before I had any kids. I told my friend that even if we never ended up needing to use them, (and the only times I can think I'd use them was if I had to take them out to a crowded place by myself, which I rarely do) at least they would get cute little backpacks out of it. But today I ended up suggesting a couple other things to get instead, b/c even though my husband put the final decision on me, I just know that he wouldn't be happy about it.

 

I am so glad you asked this question
We got 2 cute pink poodle harness/backpacks for the girls 1st birthday...but I was going to return them. I have hung onto them 'just in case' we decide we might want to use them.
I think I will play it by ear & see how things go once they are really off & walking/running :good:

 

We had one for our son and while we didn't use it all the time, it was definitely something I'm glad I have! (my MIL just bought them for the girls, haven't used them, yet...)

Last week I took my son and his friend (both 3) into the city on the train/bus. For their safety I had the backpacks on both of them. Mostly, I just loop the "tail" around my wrist and hold their hands, but it's feels much better knowing they can't get out of my sight (either by their own design or tragically by someone else's). Almost everyone that saw them (1st of all thought they were twins said, oh, that's sooo cute!!! Both boys have worn them on various occasions since they could walk and have no problems with them.

 

I have them and I too also look to "down" on parents who used them BUT that was before I was a parent and I thought I knew it all
There were a life saver at the zoo, where we go often since we are members. Also my DS would climb out of the stroller, even when buckled in.
Now I dont really use them, but my son still wears his everyday. It is his "puppy costume" as he calls it. He loves dogs and uses it for pretend play! He just brought for show and tell to school, no leash.

 

We have the dog and monkey harnesses too and I LOVE them! The girls don't want to sit in their stroller any more. Very different things pique their interests and they inevitably go in two directions. A few weeks ago, my DH forgot to pack the "hugs" (as we call them) when brought the girls out to my roller derby bout. I was upstairs in the mezzanine running the scoreboard and had a very useless bird's eye view of him trying to keep up with them. It was gut-wrenching for me to watch powerlessly from upstairs and hard for me to concentrate on my job, especially when McKenna came a few steps from running onto the track! And it was exhausting for DH to keep up with them. He won't be forgetting the "hugs" again anytime soon!

 

We used one for Sierra when hiking and it was great to allow her to move around but still be safe. We will be bringing it out again this summer for Dax when we go on a trip. He is incredibly fast and can disappear in an instant, even when you have your eyes pinned on him. It's amazing. Since it's not that comfortable for a little one to have their arms hanging for an extended period of time (like they do when they are holding your hand) I don't really worry too much about what people think. I've had very spirited twins but Dax is in a league of his own. I'm sure there are many people who look down on keeping kindergarteners in carseats but my kids' safety is paramount.

 

I guess I was ahead of my time. I first used a harness 30 years ago with my own daughter. We were going to the mountains and I had a horror of her getting away and tumbling down the mountainside. I bought two for my daughter when she had the twins. We don't use them all the time but in a crowded situation we put them on the boys and they love them. We went to the Wiggles Concert and I can't tell you how many children we saw with similar backpack harnesses. We went to the fair and again - tons of kids in the harnesses. The boys have always been good about standing at our side and we have them "hold on to our pocket" when we have both hands busy getting the second and third out of the car, but I still love the security of the harness that I can put over my wrist. They'll actually go and get their harness - to them it equates going to fun events. A lot of times we have a hard time getting them to take them off.

 

it's funny how many of us used to look down on their usage, but now feel it might be necessary. my boys are walking up a storm now and i have them on my list of things to buy. i can't imagine letting them walk around w/out some way of making sure i don't lose them...

~~jl

 

I always thought they were cute and good for safety. Alice loves her Monkey, we remove the strap and let her just wear the monkey. Royce couldn't care one way or the other.

 

I didn't have strong feelings on it one way or another before we had the kids, and DH and I were in agreement by the time they were about 20 months or so and running all over the place (in separate directions, of course) that we would try 'em...if the kids liked them, we'd use them. If they hated them, we'd chalk it up to experience and move on. We live in a busy urban area, where most kid-friendly activities involve walking around city streets and so forht, which also affected our decision.

Anyway...we got them in advance of our trip in Feb to Nebraska, and the boys LOVED THEM from the start. They actually both refused to take them off to go to nap the first few days. We have the Eddie Bauer monkey backpacks (the boys call them "Monkey Dooos"), and they were a lifesaver in the crowded airports. They ask to wear them around the house for dress up too.

 

I've thought about those leashes also. I don't want people to think that I'm gonna have 2 dogs with me.... but you know what... it's too scary out there anymore with children getting lost or worse. I will get them when my twins are old enough. I'd rather have people think I'm cruel or mean 'leashing' my kids then for them to be lost or taken from me. Safety first!!!!!!!