Is this typical for this age?

Took Aaron to the dentist this morning. When we got out, it was 10am. I asked him "you have an hour for lunch, are you going to make it?" He said "yup". So I took him back to school. We pull into the parking lot and I ask him "So where is your class at 10am?" He tells me but then says "Mom, I missed snack, I'm going to STARVE".

I love the boy dearly but his non-listening skills combined with his need for drama is killing me.

 

I don't know if it's typical for 7, but it's certainly typical for 6. I keep thinking they must be old enough to have SOME ability to listen, plan ahead, etc., but no, they seem to keep expecting me to spoon-feed them (literally and figuratively) every little thing.

 

Normal....I volunteer in my girls 1st grade class and have worked w/ lower elem kids. They are still a wide range of developmentally 'normal' for a sense of time, responsibility, and listening=action going on.

Really-- developmentally they are just bridging the gap between NOW and delayed gratification. Although many kiddos 'get' the concept of a day, a week, a year, etc- their sense of time is much different than adults and if they arent hungry, sleepy, etc one minute- it is fully normal for them to complain of being so 15-30 min later!

It takes time and rhythm to plan ahead--- practice helps too. A change of routine will almost always trip them up (as it still does some adults)-- that age thrives on structure and routine, right/wrong, etc. If you change things up- often they will not realize such things (such as missing snack) until the moment is upon them.


As adults, we know that if we normally eat at 12, but know a meeting will keep us later-- to eat a snack at 11 or so. Kids rarely plan that far ahead. Part of it is that as adults, not only do we know what an hour feels like, but we also have learned from the natural concequence of not eating. At age 6-7 kids are still figuring this out (both natural concequences and the concept of how long an hour is-- not just 60 minutes, but how long it feels.

Drama is also standard!! LOL. They are still playing with emotions and really getting a feel for how their actions effect others....it is the gradual transition from being the center of the world to considering peers opinions and feelings-- which results in DRAMA as they see how different scenarios play out. If they are tired, hungry, etc then they tend to fall back on the younger more ego-centric pattern of what they want and they want it NOW. As they age-- hunger, fatigue, and stress will be better managed. But at age 5-7/8ish-- no way!

They also are seeing peers reactions and testing the waters to see how that behavior works for them...they are way more aware of different rules at different houses (or different at home and school) and questioning it than when they are younger.

Humor is often the best deflator of drama in our house (one of our DDs is a major major drama llama!)....that or if it is really intense, some time spent getting themselves (and their dignity) together is also beneficial.

We do a lot of logical concequences (with parental prompting). If mom says take your coat and explains it will rain later-- you choose to not wear it and complain of getting wet at the bus stop. Sorry. But I almost ALWAYS give them a verbal description of why a certain choice may be a good idea rather than letting them figure it out. Even remind them two or three at times.

I will tell you my kiddos have gotten wet at the bus stop (or not got to play outside because they didnt choose to bring snow boots) a few times. Now it is no longer a problem, but it took several times!!

 

Speaking of learning from experience (or not) -- this morning Amy discovered that her favorite ornament was broken. She had been moving ornaments around last night (despite being told multiple times not to) and had dropped it. She hung it back on the tree without realizing till this morning that a little piece was broken.

She was very upset and I said we'd try to glue it, but I also hoped she would finally learn not to touch the ornaments. I gave it to DH for super-gluing, walked back into the living room, and caught her kneeling on the edge of the couch, moving another ornament around. Literally not 10 minutes after she was devastated about the broken one. :wacko: