Is my baby normal?

Last night we ate dinner with my mom, she was holding Danny and just casually mentioned that she saw a tv show on autism and that one sign is that the baby doesn't make eye contact. Danny does make eye contact and has a great laugh. He just only does it when he wants to and not with the person who is holding him. He plays with his toys and interacts with his brother. His favorite thing to do is lay on his back and play with his hands. I have been worried a little about him mentally though and her comment didn't help. I have always assumed he was just laid back. How do you know?

 

How old is he?

 

He will be 6 months tomorrow.

 

I saw a study that was on Dateline that said it's hard to tell before six months and even then it doesn't necessarily mean a diagnosis of autism. They said if it's still happening around one year, they should be submitted for other tests.

After watching this, I kept calling my girls names to see if they would look in my direction (they were almost six months). One would, one wouldn't. Now, a couple of weeks later, they both turn and look when I call them. So, give it time and don't worry.

 

Ok, take a deep breath. He's young yet, and unless you see other symptoms. I wouldn't worry. My 6 mo's look where they want to look, usually at each other or whatever is going on. Eye contact at this age, when there is so much to look at, isn't a guarantee.

Why are you worried about him mentally? Is he slower than the other twin? If he's interacting, he sounds like he's doing well. Of our boys, Jamie is the go getter, roll arounder vs Lukas who is laid back and just likes to chill. That doesn't mean there's anything wrong with either.

If you are really worried, ask your ped. We don't watch TV, so when my mom makes comments about shows that she watched, I take it with a grain of salt. She doesn't always get the info that was important, just honing in on what she thinks is important.

Write down your concerns for your next ped visit. If you had preemies, you can call the County Health Dept and they should send someone out to evaluate one or both. The biggest thing is to just write stuff down based on what you see. That way you can show it to your ped for advice. They might be able to explain a different reason for each concern.

 

Keep in mind that kiddos will meter eye contact when they are trying to control stimulation. Often, when folks are visiting, is when kiddos can get overstimulated cause other people don't realize when babies show signs of "i'm done"

at nap time, my son, will look at me when I am not looking at him, but the minute I look at him, he will look away.

you could also see if he has mirror neurons firing -- essentially if he sticks out his tongue when you stick yours out or if he mimics you eating by choming him mouth when you eat. they've done some rudimentary research that links a lack of mirror neurons to future autism -- but again, I don't think that's been followed up yet. (Scientific American had an article in late 2006)

I'd relax until you have something to worry about. My kiddos are not as interactive with others as they are with me.

Teri D

 

DD is less "social" than DS. She is more interested in things and he's more interested in people. I have spent time worrying about austism b/c it seems to be so prevalent today. DD looks at me plenty, but I have to tell myself that just b/c she doesn't gaze longingly into my eyes like DS does, doesn't mean she has autism.

 

My daughter is EXACTLY like your baby. She doesn't want to look at you if you hold her. She will basically look at anything else. AND...she is constantly inspecting her hands. I know this is just because she found them and, wow, they are kind of cool looking. Every time before she sucks her thumb, she has to inspect them.'

My PT and OT was just over and I asked them the same exact question. They said it can't truly be diagnosed until about 15 months UNLESS the baby has extreme autism.

I feel much better now knowing there is another baby out there like my daughter. Thanks for posting!!

 

Mine wouldn't look at the person holding them til like 7 1'2 months. It was a huge game we played to try to get their attention. Now they are totally engaged, lauging, playing and digging, scratching and caressing the face of the hands they are in. Good luck, but I wouldn't worry too much, we've got so much other stuff to think about, don't we?

 

OMG!!! I was just talking about this with my husband this morning. I was telling him that I worry about one of my girls all the time. Maria will actually avert her eyes away from me if I hold her in front of me and say her name over and over to her face! But this is also after a couple of hours of her being awake. First thing in the morning, she is staring right at me and cooing and giggling. I'm thinking she's just an overstimulated sort of kid and can't help but be soooo into everything around her.

It's so hard not to worry especially when the reports say that an autism diagnosis is gaining momentum rather than slowing down or staying the same. It's so scary and I sympathize with you.

 

I wouldn't worry so much at this age. My 8 month old boy Drew is laid back and studies his hands and makes motions, he's been doing that for some time now. Kinda checking out what they do. That's normal. I used to worry about my oldest son, now almost 11, when he was an infant he didn't interact much just kinda laid around observing. He didn't talk much until a bit over 2 but when he did it was clear, no baby jabber. Today, he is in the "gifted" program in school and is very intelligent. I guess my point is that all babies are different, and if you have a laid back observer, it can be a good thing. With our twins..Drew is the laid back observer and Jake is the wild one. They are very different, but feel confident that both are mentally OK! Don't worry so much, discuss your concerns with the pediatrician if that will make you feel better.

 

Ok, I am sooo glad there are others in this boat! My DH has the nickname '911', and our boys do the same things you described! They are the same age too! My hubby is such a worry wart that everytime we go to the peds and he sees a poster about autism he f4reaks!

Autism is, although not fully, more understood tody than it ever has been and so more and more children are being diagnosed.

One of my boys stopped 'talking' for a while, and of course Dh was beside himself with worry, and just tonight I was at a local Twin meeting and he decided it was time to start up again!

Who knew?!

 

I thought this link might be helpful to you. http://www.drspock.com/article/0,1510,4935,00.html
It's way to early to even discuss autism. Babies have many autistic qualities and that's absolutely normal. Over time they are learning to balance between these autistic qualities and social skills. For example, playing with his hands is a developmental milestone at this age. Developmental tests ask if they do this because it's one of the things they should be doing at about 6 months. Now if they keep doing this when they are 3 or 4 for long stretches of time then maybe (just maybe) this might signal a problem.
Averting their eyes might be a sign of overstimulation, being tired or finding something else more interesting. He looks when he wants to so that's enough. Babies don't have the necessary social graces to look at someone just because they want them to! He plays with you and his brother so that's great!
I think sometimes grandparents don't realize how impactful their comments are. We are so conserned about our babies health as it is that one comment can create an avalance of anxiety.
What is it that is making you worry about him mentally? (except your mother's comment?)

 

When he was first born he was very forceful and definitly made his presence known. Now he seems to check everything out first. He loves to talk and make noises. But it is a lot less than in the beginning. It's mostly the looks that he gives sometimes. If Dh and I are on the couch he will look at the one who isin't holding him and interact with them. And he laughs at his brother. He is satisfied watching himself clasp his hands for about 5 minutes. Maybe it was just the comment that my mom made.