Is it bad to stay at home?

My 6 month old twins do really well on their routine when we stay at home during the day, eat well, good naps, go to sleep, no crankiness, like to play in their room, etc.
I move them around the house a lot, plenty of tummy time and different toys and I play with them too, and we go for a stroller walk every day, but whenever we have guests or I have to run an errand, I dread taking them with us because they get cranky, don't eat well, are off their naps and that makes me upset. It usually translates into a bad day if we leave the house.

Most days I prefer just to stay home with them because it is easier and everyone is happier. My MIL thinks it is awful that they don't get out and see things etc. She always wants to be *doing* something with them for fun. I'd rather just stay home. Do you think I am keeping them from too many new experiences and making life harder for myself down the line when we travel at Christmas? It's not that they NEVER go out. We occasionally take them to brunch or to the mall or grocery shopping, but prob. not more than once a week. What do you think?

 

I would love to be able to stay at home like that! I don't think it is bad at all!! what do they need to see out right now??
strangers and nasty germs? I think the time will come when you will take them places - but for now the naps and feeding schedules are the most important thing! it helps them and YOU!

 

Well, 6 month olds don't really "do" much, but I do think that all children benefit from a change of scenery and new experiences. I think once a week is great, that's more than I get out. <_<

 

I think you are doing just fine!! At 6 months old, you want to make it as easy as possible, on yourself and your babies. Once they get a little older they will enjoy going out and your trips will be happier!

I really wouldn't worry about MIL. No, you are not depriving or sheltering them from anything!

 

Never did much around 6 months either. I think that is just fine and you should do what works well for your twins!

 

I am definitely not the norm because for the first 4-5 months I was out of the house almost everyday. BUT, it was for my sanity because I had horribly fussy babies due to colic and reflux. I think our MIL's comment is just that - another MIL comment. My opinion is you do what is comfortable for you. I agree with Jenny, an occasional change of scenery is definitely a good thing because they are getting older and will enjoy looking around at all the "new stuff" out there. My girls used to be great in the car and now their patience is shortening so who knows whether going out or not would help travel at Christmas. I am sure you are doing a GREAT job mommy!!!

 

I work so when I'm home with the girls in the evening and weekends I just want to stay home with them! We do occasionally go out to dinner or grandma's or the park. But usually I just want to stay home, stay in our routine and have a "regular' non running around day with them!

Ignore your mil! It's what I do!

 

When mine were that age, it was December, so it was winter and we didn't go out much at all! <_< The seem to be okay today.
I think you have to do what works best for you and the little ones. Sure, experience is nice and all, but I think it will be more beneficial when they are a little older. If they are happy staying home with you and things work out better, then so be it. I know I didn't go out much not only because it was cold but for the same reasons you listed...it messed up our schedule. Plus, when they do get older they will WANT to go out and you have no choice, because they say byebyebyebye a million times, so enjoy it while it lasts!

 

You do what YOU want. If she wants them to have a change, ask her to take them out for you once a week. Then you can have some time for yourself! :icon_biggrin:

 

I stay at home most of the time too. I thinks its hard enough trying to keep them on a schedule as it is....it is so much worse when we are out for the day.

 

I am exactly the same way. If I do take them out I try to time it perfectly so that car trips are naps, etc. My kids are happier at home with familiar things and their routine. My best friend is getting married next week and nobody can understand why I'm not taking the twins to show them off. It's a 2-day wedding out of town. My twins do not like parties! My husband and I are going and the boys are staying home with my mum and her husband. They'll be much happier that way. We took them to my MIL's 60th bday party in June and it was a disaster. They screamed for three hours straight! I think I'll wait until they're older before I venture too far with them again.

 

During the summer, while my oldest kids are out of school and all of their activities and sports, we rarely get out more than once or twice a week. It's much easier to stay at home on schedule, but it feels good to break the routine every once in a while.

 

We stay at home a lot too... the boys don't seem to take in too much when we go out- they mostly stare at me or whatever teething toy we've brought, so getting out is more for me at this stage. I tend to feel more relaxed on days we don't have to go anywhere- I know they can sleep, eat etc as required, which makes us ALL happier.

I know when they get older and are more excited about being out and about we'll go out more often, but for now, keeping outings to a minimum works best for us. I agree that if your MIL thinks your babies should get out more, she should take them out to the park or wherever for a couple of hours and give you some time to relax on your own!

 

I'm with you! My boys seem to thrive on our schedule and when they miss naps, chaos occurs! Plus, it's terribly hot here, so when we go out, it has to be to the mall or some place cool which isn't terribly close to our house.

Once a week is about where I'm at, too! And it's when DH is home so we make an event of going to the grocery store or Target or something!

 

I'm going to go against the grain here a bit - first I want to say you must do what is comfortable for you! However by getting into a "set in stone" routine means that the kids will have a harder time adapting in the future - they will only do certain things at certain times because thats what they've always done...for us we've instilled a bit of flexibility in the twins, so that if lunch is early or dinner is delayed they don't meltdown as easily...

 

Wow! Thanks for all of the support. I was feeling really guilty about being a bad mom, what relief that I am not the only one who prefers staying home on a routine most days. We have guests here right now and they are driving me CRAZY! Luckily they leave today and I am looking forward to getting my girls back on their schedule and not having to clean up after someone else and their children. What a pain!
Thanks again.

 

We hardly ever went out with ours until they were about a year old. Like you said, it was too much of a pain. We did take them on stroller walks, and we'd stop at the park and let them out to crawl around on the grass (when they were that age). But even this was a lot more fun when they were cruising than it had been earlier. Until 9 months or so, we really only took them out when we had to (Christmas, family birthdays, etc.).

I felt very sorry for myself sometimes when I saw all the things that our friends with singletons could do with their babies. But our world opened up SO much when they were both walking. That helped a lot in itself, but at that age they also just became a lot more interested in things, so it was actually worth it to take them places.

Hang in there! Do whatever is easiest for you right now. (But, if you do want to get out more, also be aware that it gets easier with practice. So if you try something and it doesn't seem to work out right, don't give up! Try it again!)

 

6-9 months was the hardest time for me... they wanted to get down and crawl... It was awful! I think once a week is good. Dont let anyone talk you into more than you are comfortable doing! Only you know you and your babies the best!

 

I am so glad you posted this! I used to go out more when Amy and Matthew were 3-4 months but now I tend to stay home most days. Sometimes it is just a pain in the neck to go out for many reasons. First you really start to notice they need their schedule of napping and feeding and changong. I feel bad when they sleep anytime I am on the car even if its just 10 mins. Then they are awake when we are strolling along, or maybe they sleep again. Secondly, I have not fed them their cereal while out....can'teven think about that!

I feel bad sometimes that they are not out as much as they used to be because they understand "being out " now more so than before. But i try to make activities at home as varied as possible. I think nextt month I will have toventure out more so they cn learn about the world beyond home sweet home.

2 weekends ago I we took them to the Bronx Zoo. It was a very hot day and they didnm't "get" the point of the zoo. When will they "get" the point of seeing animals? ot that you could see them when they are so far away "in their natural style habitat."

I know it is politically incorrect to wish for the days of cages and all but we could not see the animals ourselves let alone 2 little almost 6 monthers. Sorry for a long rambling post. I thinK I will post a-new for where you all tlake the babies and at what age.