Intro..

Hi New here a friend told me about this site..My name is Rose Im 25 years old married for 4 years, stay at home mom.. I have a 2 year girl (Eliana) we decided to have another baby and well surpise its twins..lol well there here. Born may 22..They arrived via c/s at 38weeks and 5days weighing 5lbs 12oz and 5lbs 8oz..(Adassa and Naomi) we were hoping for a vbac but girls never turned..both breeched. We had a good experience tho. Only I've had a hard time bonding with them and with the whole no sleep thing hasnt helped niether. Im so clueless to the whole twin thing. Im just taking it day by day..im getting use to it..I was very overwhelm with everything.. now were getting the hang of it.. Just wondering how do I get them on a schdule or a routine..is there anything I should know..im sure there are tons of things..any advise is welcome. Im trying my best to bf also and finding it extremly hard..i've been pumping and well everthing right now seems so time consuming. I guess I really want to yell out HELP!! I got twins..what the heck do I do now..lol

-Rose

 

:sign0016: to TS! Congratulations on your Twins!

Right now you are in the thick of it. Having newborn twins is incredibly hard, and just remember you are in survival mode. You have to do whatever you need to do to keep you sane and the babies happy. Having a schedule was impossible until my girls were about 4 months old (adjusted), as much as I tried... You are right about taking it one day at a time, and before you know it you will emerge from the newborn fog and then it gets fun!

We do have a breastfeeding forum here on TS, and those women are awesome and they can help with you with any questions you may have, and they are a great resource for support!

Do you have anyone that can help you so you can get some uninterupted rest from time to time?

 

Hi Rose & welcome!!!!!!!!!

congrats on your little girls

I too had a SUPER hard time bonding with my little girls in the beginning. I had a case of the 'baby blues' and I was in a little bit of shock (first time parent!). Those first couple months were a challenge for sure.

Taking it day by day (or even hour by hour) is the best way to deal with things in the beginning.
I tried to pump for the first 2 weeks, but was too overwhelmed & sleep deprived, so I ended up formula feeding & in turn I was able to sleep. For ME it was the right decision - A happy/rested mom was better for my girls than a sad/frustrated/depressed one

Do you have help right now? Can you take turns with some of the feedings? Those every 3 hour feedings round the clock can be really exhausting & time consuming - so having a little bit of help is amazing.

One thing that some of the ladies on here told me that was really helpful was about feeding the babies at the same time. I didnt think I could do it (and would cry cry cry) so I was feeding them individually, which took over 2 hours from beginning to end sometimes. So what I was told and did was this:
I would get 2 boppys & put them in front of me & lay each baby in one & hold or (gasp!!!) prop their bottles up w/ a blanket or burp rag. burp one, set back down, then burp the other. It saved me sooo much time & I was able to sneak in more sleep, even if it was just a half an hour more.

I know things will get easier day by day (I didnt believe this till it actually happened!) so hang in there & please come here to vent or ask questions. there are some of the nicest most helpful moms on here!

It will get soooo much better!

 

Welcome :sign0016:

this is a great site for advice, infos, support... and the occasionnal vent!

About breastfeeding, some of the ladies swear by the E-Z pillow. I was so busy and overwhelmed at the beginning, and also recovering from a C-section, I didn't have time/the energy to log onto the computer, so I had already sort of established a routine when I heard about it. But I've heard it is sooo much easier with it. Anyway, I remember how hard these first weeks were! My boys were breastfeeding every 2 hours for what seemed an eternity to me. It was exhausting, but I made it, and you will too! The good thing is that you're staying home, so you should try to masterize the art of cat-napping whenever your babies are sleeping. It is important. Really.

About your first DD, you don't mention her age. Anyway, she's likely to suffer from all the attention given to the newborn. So, it might help if your DH spends some time playing, reading with her, or takes care of the babies while you use bath time to give her your undivided attention.

C-section was difficult for me to recover from. Do not push your limits. You need to recover to be able to take care of your babies and their sister. So, take it slowly, avoid carrying the babies and get help from DH and family/friends as much as you can.

Hang in there, as the ones with older kids will tell you, it WILL get better!

 

Congratulations on your twins. If you remember nothing else remember this: It does get easier. Mine are 9 months old now and it is great. I love having twins. The first 4 months are very hard. Just do what you have to to survive. My house looked like a tornado went through it the first 4 months. This is a great forum also for information. If we ever have a concern, I tell DH that I am going to ask the ladies on Twinstuff and I always get the answer. Well good luck. Take care.

 

:sign0016: Rose! There's a sticky at the top of the FY board which is a handbook for the first year with twinfants. I'm sure you'll find some helpful information. I'm so glad you found TS! You are definitely in the right place to find encouragement and support. When mine first came home, I read this board whenever I could because there were other women who had babies near the age of mine. I read the posts they made and I was able to learn. I was also able to learn reading posts about babies a little bit older so I could keep that info. in mind. Of course, feel free to post your questions. We would all love to help answering them!

ETA for grammer.

 

Welcome to TS and congratulations on your babies! Those first couple months are very busy and the sleep deprivation is difficult. My girls came home from the NICU on a schedule so I can't help you with that... I think if you are going to try to implement a schedule, start with feeding.. if one wakes to eat, wake the other and feed her too. I know you usually never wake a sleeping baby, but with twins it can save your sanity to not be feeding someone constantly. If you are BF-ing, definitely check out the BF board here on TS. Those ladies will definitely be able to help you out. GL and post here and yell anytime. We all understand!

 

Hi Rose and :sign0016: to the First Year. You got some great advice so I just wanted to say "Welcome."

 

welcome Rose!! you've been given lots of good advice above. Just getting through at the moment is your best thing. Routine/schedule will probably happen later. Just feed/change/sleep them at the same time and you sleep whenever you can, oh and grab the ocassional shower. Hugs to you.

 

HI Rose!
Glad you found us, I went through a hard time, ok VERY hard time the first few months, overwhelmed, new mom, sleep deprived, etc, etc, and I found that venting or asking questions on this site was invaluable to me. I honestly thought that someone was playing a cruel joke on me the first few months, I felt like I was in he11. But, things do get better, I promise, I remember those hard days and I remember people telling me to wait weeks and things would get better. Just take it one hour at a time, and sometimes I even took it one minute at a time. Try to get breaks wherever you can, dh and I broke down and hired daytime and some nighttime help - so if there is anyway you can get some help so that you can sleep or do whatever, please try and do that.
I too had a hard time bonding with the babies, as I really felt they were just lumps, they didn't interact with us in anyway. It wasnt until around 3months that I started to feel a real connection with the babies, it was right around the time that the colic ended, and we saw real smiles. So don't worry if you dont have that instant bond, for some of us love takes time to grow a bit.
I too bf and pushed through the first few months, they were so hard, we had latching issues, and the feedings would often take 1.5hrs, just to start it all up again an hour later (which doesn't leave much time for sleeping : ) I tandem bf and that helped a lot, I also have the ez2 nurse pillow, and stupid me didn't realize that the small little pillow that came with it was for back support, and after about 1.5mnths I figured that out and the pillow now works great!
Hang in there, and dont' be afraid to ask for help, right now you really need it.

 

:hug99:
I think you need a hug. You'll be fine. The bonding will come. I had the blues, I am still BF. The EZ pillow is great and still used here. However, I hardly touched it at first. I was so tired. I would put the babies in the middle of my bed. Put a pillow on the outside of one, and nurse the other laying down and dozing. Then, the pillow and I would switch sides. The diapers were changed there also! That is how I survived the sleep deprivation. We have no family around at all.
You have had a lot of good advice. Just reading the BF forum is awesome!

 

Hi Rose, congrats on the birth of your twins!

I found that bonding was very difficult at first, but now I am so incredibly tight with my boys!!!! It took a while for me to get past the OMG there are two of them, what do i do?!?!?!? stage, and now I just love having twins. Sure, it's hard, but there are TWO little ones for me to love on and tickle and giggle with!!!

 

QUOTE(isis @ Jun 19 2008, 10:03 AM) [snapback]834819[/snapback]
HI Rose!
Glad you found us, I went through a hard time, ok VERY hard time the first few months, overwhelmed, new mom, sleep deprived, etc, etc, and I found that venting or asking questions on this site was invaluable to me. I honestly thought that someone was playing a cruel joke on me the first few months, I felt like I was in he11. But, things do get better, I promise, I remember those hard days and I remember people telling me to wait weeks and things would get better. Just take it one hour at a time, and sometimes I even took it one minute at a time. Try to get breaks wherever you can, dh and I broke down and hired daytime and some nighttime help - so if there is anyway you can get some help so that you can sleep or do whatever, please try and do that.
I too had a hard time bonding with the babies, as I really felt they were just lumps, they didn't interact with us in anyway. It wasnt until around 3months that I started to feel a real connection with the babies, it was right around the time that the colic ended, and we saw real smiles. So don't worry if you dont have that instant bond, for some of us love takes time to grow a bit.
I too bf and pushed through the first few months, they were so hard, we had latching issues, and the feedings would often take 1.5hrs, just to start it all up again an hour later (which doesn't leave much time for sleeping : ) I tandem bf and that helped a lot, I also have the ez2 nurse pillow, and stupid me didn't realize that the small little pillow that came with it was for back support, and after about 1.5mnths I figured that out and the pillow now works great!
Hang in there, and dont' be afraid to ask for help, right now you really need it.




LOL thank you! i didnt know the small pillow was for your back me and DH had no idea what to do with it :lmbo:

 

Congrats on your twins. It's really hard at the stage you are now. For me, it started getting a little better in the 6-7 week range and then just better and better from there. So, I don't know if I have much advice but I can offer hope!