I'm So Overwhelmed Re: Toddler Bed Transition

I can't take it anymore. My boys were climbing out of cribs, so we got toddler beds. We thought it may take some adjustment, but they have always been really good kids. They listen really well. And they have NEVER had a problem going to sleep in cribs.

I was so wrong. I have no idea what to do. The first two weeks, we sat in the room until they fell asleep. Everytime we would get ready to leave, if they were still awake, they would run to the door and scream and cry. After two weeks passed, and we were in their room for at least an HOUR EVERY NIGHT, we tried something different. We laid them down, and then when they got up, we just kept going in over and over again and quietly putting them in bed. Again, this took over any hour and no improvement.

So then, we tried locking them in their rooms (we have a video monitor) to let them cry it out. We would go in every 15-20 minutes. This lasted 3 hours, and we felt it was kind of cruel so we quit that.

So for the past week, we have been staying in their room for 5 minutes. (When we stay in there, they never try to get up -- but they don't sleep either.) Then, we slowly make our way to the door and watch them on video. Everytime they pop up, we open the door and say lay down. Again this is taking at least an hour.

Tonight, we have even done several time outs. NOTHING IS WORKING!!! Please, help me. Would putting a tv in their room help? I'm so desperate. In addition to this, they are also waking up several times in the night and they are getting up so early in the morning. I am not interested in crib tents because we gave away one of the cribs to a needy family.

I"m so overwhelmed. So desperate.

 

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QUOTE(Sabrina Fischer @ Apr 4 2007, 04:08 AM) [snapback]205356[/snapback]
I can't take it anymore. My boys were climbing out of cribs, so we got toddler beds. We thought it may take some adjustment, but they have always been really good kids. They listen really well. And they have NEVER had a problem going to sleep in cribs.

I was so wrong. I have no idea what to do. The first two weeks, we sat in the room until they fell asleep. Everytime we would get ready to leave, if they were still awake, they would run to the door and scream and cry. After two weeks passed, and we were in their room for at least an HOUR EVERY NIGHT, we tried something different. We laid them down, and then when they got up, we just kept going in over and over again and quietly putting them in bed. Again, this took over any hour and no improvement.

So then, we tried locking them in their rooms (we have a video monitor) to let them cry it out. We would go in every 15-20 minutes. This lasted 3 hours, and we felt it was kind of cruel so we quit that.

So for the past week, we have been staying in their room for 5 minutes. (When we stay in there, they never try to get up -- but they don't sleep either.) Then, we slowly make our way to the door and watch them on video. Everytime they pop up, we open the door and say lay down. Again this is taking at least an hour.

Tonight, we have even done several time outs. NOTHING IS WORKING!!! Please, help me. Would putting a tv in their room help? I'm so desperate. In addition to this, they are also waking up several times in the night and they are getting up so early in the morning. I am not interested in crib tents because we gave away one of the cribs to a needy family.

I"m so overwhelmed. So desperate.

 

I may have quoted you before for no reason. Sorry, technical difficulties with new systerm.

I'm sorry that you are having such a hard time adjusting to the toddler bed. We didn't have the same amount of trouble that you are having, though we did go through about a month of silly behavior in bed with the new freedom. We just kept putting them back in bed over and over and over again. Some nights were easier than others, but eventually they settled down. We did at times close their door (which mine hate), but we didn't keep going in at regular intervals. The up til 10pm parties tapered down and then they slept. We have since gone through some difficult phases (I want water, can I go pee-pee?...) and we again had to put our foot down and close the door once in a while. But it passes. That has been our experience.

This may sound crazy, but perhaps if they get really tired (keep them up?), maybe they will just crash. I don't really have any new advice. The tv nanny's say to not talk and just keep putting them back into bed. I'd try that again or just close the door and not return for a night or two. Perhaps that might work?

GL,

 

How old are they? We switched at 2.5 & had about a month of trouble. I know some moms who had alot of luck separating them to get them to sleep. Maybe you can try that for a while.

 

I'd spend the money on crib tents till they are old enough to understand better. That much stress isn't good for either or you.

 

I have to agree that Jessica gave some great advice above. However, I know you mentioned you gave away the crib, so it may not be an option for you. Before we switched J&H into beds, we emptied their room of everything, I mean everything. Even put the dresser in the closet & locked the doors. They only had beds, one blanket & a pillow (they never had 'lovies' or we would have left those also). We were lucky in that we never had any problems, but that may have helped them to settle - having nothing to play with or get into. Putting a gate across their door (maybe 2 high if they are climbers) may help in your situation, too. I'm not sure how old they are, mine were 2 1/2 & able to understand the rules and such. We really built up the fact that they were getting beds so they could sleep like 'big kids' and Daddy even had them help build the beds. We talked for days before hand about how exciting it would be to sleep in them and talked about how they had to stay in them and stay in the room, etc. I think the more upset you get and the more you fight with them, the more it will seem like a game to them.

 

We are having the exact same problem with Connor, although we switched them to beds 2 months ago with no problems at all. Just out of the blue he is doing the same thing yours are and forget about nap time. It just doesn't happen anymore.

We've tried sleepytime tea to calm him at bedtime. Didn't work for us. Telling him what he's supposed to do doesn't work. He will only go to sleep if we are in there and slip out quietly either just as he is dozing off or just after. It takes anywhere from 15 min to an hour depending on how tired he is. Oh, and I don't talk to him at all once we've said good-night the first time. Just silence...

Sometimes he wakes in the night and we have to do it all over again! And he's been getting up early, too.

I'm hoping yours (and mine) are only going through a stage and that they will settle down soon. One thing we did try for a nap once was to take him for a car ride. He fell asleep w/in 10 min. I don't know if you could move yours into their beds if they feel asleep in the car and I know that's not a permanant solution... :hug99: It's worth s try for a few nights of peace for you.

 

Yikes! I would try the no talking and consistency being key. I would not remain in the room. Just place them back in and leave, place them back in and leave etc; Maybe get a babysitter one night and see if a "stranger" has better luck. ugh. You have cemented my decision to keep mine in cribs until age 3. I will invest in the crib tents if I have too. So far Archer has only climbed from his crib to Phoebe's.

Best of luck to you!

 

I experienced this same problem only at nap time though! My only resolution was to seperate them. I too had sold my cribs, and tents. I had to resort to a pack n play in a different room. It worked immediately. I could not get them to sleep while together, they just played around. I put them to bed first, walk out and give them a minute or two, and then go back in and say that's 1, repeat, that's 2, and then on the 3rd time of having to go back in, I seperate them. That method is from the 1-2-3- magic book for discipline. I would also make sure the rooms are very dark, that was another obstacle for me also. Good Luck!!

 

I'm sorry to tell you that the same happened to me and I was a wreck. It did pass after 6 weeks. However the catalyst to the whole thing seemed to be a trip to grandma and grandpa's house. When we got home a switch just seemed to click and all was better. We did however loose our naps.